Immortal

Special thanks to Priscilla Moore, for her inspiration of this. And everyone else who inspires me, you played a part in this too.

Ink filled pens

Wearing our hearts

In the vulnerable stings

Of broken love and pasts.

Stories to be told

Imaginations soar

Painting the creative aspects

In a search of self-reflection.

 

Pick a color,

Let your rage show

In the constant spills

Like bittersweet lullabies.

 

We are not God,

As we search within our selves

For the answering of burning

Undying questions of reality.

 

We are not infinite...

As humans...

Caught in the idea

To live forever and beyond.

 

We are our words from the wise

Creators of what we choose to be born

In the skies of eternity to which

We will remain immortal.

Author's Note

Not sure about the title though, suggestions will be appreciated.

Reviews

[ken burke]

Amazing poem nd perfect title its so full of emotion good job

[Chantelle]

I loved reading this. So full of emotion with some wise messages in there too. Love the title too, no need to change that.
I really think the ending was very powerful also: "In the skies of eternity to which we will remain immortal" - beautiful :)

[Crow]

A wonderfully prosed piece that expresses human emotion and life. I found the imagery fantastic, and the message full of insight and truth.

Well done!

[Shadow in the Dark]

I think that the title is a good fit for the poem. Great poem! When we write it is us pouring out our emotions, thoughts, feelings, and memories and like you wrote we are not God so no matter how hard you try to anwser the questions inside of you you can't.

[Amila Jay]

I agree with storiestotell!! super write:)

[KAREN]

Awesome write! Love the meaning of this poem. You give all writers inspiration!
100/100

[J. J. Nightingale]

The written word outlives mere mortal flesh ... Our thoughts and hearts are known to the next generation .. and they reflect our struggles and our joys ...

Well done .. Jasmine :)

[Priscilla Sayers]

Perfect Title! Don't change a thing. You a poet who brings music and grace. The footprints and impression left by you.... An immortal soul now a place you hold your existence witnessed.... Your voice is known.
Keep writing, keep growing, keep dreaming.... Fluttered you wings that feverishly raise you up. You Are Flying.

Sicerely,
Yours....

Priscilla Moore

[Robbie~xoxo~]

OH MY GOSH!! you are AMAZING! I cannot tell you how much you inspire me.... You are a true gift to poetry. "YOU" are poetry! LOVE THIS! :)

[J.V. Stanley]

The title seems absolutely perfect for this piece and it is seriously a work of art. We do strive for a sort of immortality within this life, strive to be remembered someway somehow whether it be by our writing or our actions or simply the memory of us that as carried by others whom we have touched in some way that they take along with them.

Mostly regarding writers, we do use our words as a sort of inner reflection of who are are upon the inside and those who read those words don't see them as a part of us necessarily, they tend to look inward and see those words and relate to them within themselves. By relating our writing to themselves is a way for them to remember us because well...we were brave enough to bring it out and forward, sharing those words, those emotions, that rage, that love with the world.

This is truly well penned