Ruined

I was really depressed when I wrote this one. It is really sad for me.

Romance novels have ruined me,

But not in the way you would think.

They didn’t kill my innocent belief in the Stork.

They didn’t train me to be dependent or weak.

But they ruined me all the same.

 

They showed me love.

That true love that fairy tales describe.

They showed me the rewards

Given to people who are good and strong.

They showed me the ultimate happy ending.

 

It is a happy ending I crave.

A longing to have someone love me that much.

A longing to have someone I love that much.

A wish to be happy.

A wish to never be alone.

 

But I’ll never get that.

The world is too vast and the people to many.

How can I find my soul mate while locked in this cage?

How can I search for my love when the chains are unbreakable?

And, if I did find him, what then?

 

‘Give him your heart.’

I can’t.

It is torn and bleeding and battered.

 

‘Give him your mind.’

I can’t.

It is fragmented and poisoned.

 

‘Give him your soul.’

I can’t.

It was stolen and only an aching hole remains.

 

All I have is my beloved facade.

My beautiful lie.

My carefully crafted mask that no one notices.

Beneath it there is nothing,

But cold, white walls with no life or color.

 

White like hospital rooms.

White like the light that hurts my eyes.

White like the hope that is always dashed.

 

I am truly ruined.

Never could I be content with someone I just like a lot.

But true love would never find me.

You can’t have a soul mate

If you do not have a soul.

Author's Note

I hope you like it, even if it is depressing.

Reviews

[A.r. Bazian]

I LOVED IT BRIT!
you have no idea!
well... lets talk literature...
the structure is well crafted
diction is very descriptive and strong
feelings are amazingly revolting
and the pictures are drawn clear!
now... lets talk, as friends...
my friend, the feeling, the confession, and the bravery show you have a soul!
its blurry when you're looking outside in... because of how many times you've been hurt!
you're heart is white... which is a saying we have in my part of the world indicating the loving potential of a person and how warmhearted they r! i believe you say... a heart of gold!
and yes... you do have a heart of gold!
the hollowness and the emptiness you feel inside are what show the loving soul that is longing for love... and if you do not have a soul... you can never long for love!
and you do long for love... thus, you do have soul!
look deeply into your heart...
its the only way to find the light!
and you have plenty of light!

be well
love and respect

[C.J.G.]

I just read this over again, and wow. Still so stunning every time i read. Keep writing; you've given me hope. Again, truly indescribably amazing.

[ashley]

This was heartbreakingly sad, but a fantastic write. I love it, 100/100! Great job! :D

[C.J.G.]

That truly took my breath away. You are an amazing poet, absolutely incredible. It was clear, but beautifully mysterious. You will find him. Again, absolutely breathtaking.

[Every1s_psychotic_vampy..]

I like it! Its very dark yet so real and true. [: I hope you do findhappyness but don't wait around for it. Go find it yourself. Good job!

[Sean M. Addams]

very deep piece and the imagery is great in this...... nice job.

[Lee E. Powell]

Yes, it is very depressing and i do like it. It was incredible, but true love and bring the soul back.

[T]

Nice write! The following lines are my favorite:

I am truly ruined.

Never could I be content with someone I just like a lot.

But true love would never find me.

You can't have a soul mate

If you do not have a soul.

The ending made me smile. I love the last stanza but moreso, the last two lines.

Again, good job!

[BenightedWhispers]

This is very beautiful. Depressing and joyous poetry are all enjoyable if they are written well. This was a stupendendous poem! Even if I can't spell stupendous. XD Stupendous? Stew pending us? Oh I don't know. XD Anyway we all have that aching hole when we have nothing left. The vacancy for true love is either lost or destroyed. In the end even if we do not have anything in the beggining, we can always gain something in the end. Perhaps one day we can all find our souko (soul) and be allowed to play the game of love.

[Dr. S. D. Blankenship P..]

very good Brittany, I feel my life has been torn away from me like this way of which you have written. And I know I will fell this way forever. Nicly wrote I love the flow the image. My life is right next to a sad fairy tail.
I enjoyed reading this but it is very depressing and I fell very sad now...


Your friend Shawn

[Pakino]

This is a very nice piece. You show a part of love which people ignore or do not know about. Well written you talk about the mind, heart, and soul. Doing that really allowed the reader to understand the struggle that you faced. Cheer up not all hope is lost. :)