Hypnotize You

Random

I want to hypnotize you,

To tell you the truth,

To tell you the lie,

I want to see the real you.

 

They don’t understand,

What’s really there,

What’s really seen,

You open there eyes.

 

You say hello every day,

You’re friendly,

So kind,

You’re not where you belong.

 

Such a foreigner,

Fighting for land,

For peace of mind,

For the right to love you.

Reviews

[Dove]

this is really good i like it, my favorite lines are
I want to hypnotize you,

To tell you the truth,

To tell you the lie,

I want to see the real you
You did an amazing job on this

[J.Truth]

Its so... hypnotizing. :p the flow was definitely moving and the rhyme scheme was very well written. I felt my eyes unfocused as the words played itself over and over in my head, creating some kind of swaying beat.

They don’t understand,
What’s really there,
What’s really seen,
You open there eyes.

Definitely my favorite part of the whole. Thanks for sharing :)

[amdc101]

Such a foreigner,
Fighting for land,
For peace of mind,
For the right to love you.


That's my favorite part. This really is a beautiful and thought provoking write. Well done.

[Jupiter Jazz]

Sort of dreamy. Your passion and desire for this person is quite apparent ;)

[Coyote Poetry]

I like how you expressed your desire in this poem. You told a story of wanting to get close and to understand another person. I like the complete poem. A very good ending to a excellent poem.
Coyote