It's Okay

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What was it I had said.

So long ago, I hardly remember.

And what did you say,

You’re a terrible pretender?

Just yesterday I said,

It never really mattered.

That what’s up ahead,

We both lay battered.

 

So I’m telling you,

If you never see straight.

I’d never walk again.

Or hear just right.

And without a fight,

I might just run,

And keep on going to another world,

Without you in it.

But what’s to say,

That’s the only way.

I can still see through to the other side.

So please don’t hide,

I want you in it.

 

So come home with me,

Just tonight.

Finish what we started,

To be polite.

I’ll hold your door,

And you’ll ask for more.

And I’ll just nod,

And say okay.

Reviews

[melril18]

This is really fantastic. I LOVE the rhyme scheme. I love the way I can feel exactly what you're feeling. Very awesome. Goooood job.

[Tkess]

I like the kind of conversational nature of your poems. From what I've read of your stuff, it's almost like you are speaking directly to the reader. Like being at the bar and drinking a few and listening to the guy beside you vent.

[bluessadmood]

this world i see ,i staggered all along ,always counted on you
and you failed me ,still all i see ,all visions i see its you in it
no mater what fool i was , no mater the hurt or lies
its only with you i could see and walk again
and i could never fight ,not in a world without you
i ask you once more to come to me tonight
i will close my eyes and always dream of you
so dreamy ,the least i could say ,and lovely
lovely write..

[Dahlia Phoenix]

Unconditional love can forgive all stupidity and blossom a bond that's just unbreakable. That is why I can relate to this poem because I endured the same except I was the stupid one and in the end, when I made the right choice to walk through that door, it was the best choice I ever made.

[Mehul Rwat]

I liked the idea your poem was conveying. Really nice poem.

[amdc101]

This is very beautiful, thoughtful, and just really good. Nice job.

[EricGodsil]

I enjoyed this piece. It makes me think, which is rare and good. I also enjoyed the rhyming you had going on. First I was looking for a particular one then I was looking for maybe a multiple scheme. The first and last stanzas are quite simple but the second one a little more complex. Feels like it eases me in and eases me out but keeps the middle, the meat and potatoes, a little more satisfying and complicated. Which, in my head at least, is a little representative of the subject matter.

No technical errors and a subject common to most people. I would have to say this is a well written piece and keep up the good work.

[Jibin]

Really nice read, and it is straight to the points....
Good job dear friend....
:)

[Jupiter Jazz]

The vunerability and acceptance and unconditional love I get from this makes it a powerful, lovely write

[EMF]

Damn good read. Powerful in its vulnerability. Good work again.