Plight of the blue monkey

flash fiction

Plight of the Blue Monkey (Rough Draft)

 

And the Blue Monkey rested beside the road,
licking his wounded knuckles,
road dragged,bloodied, and blistered.
Upset at the wounds,
blaming them for his pain and suffering.

Scratching his ear with his left foot he wondered,
"Why my finners hurt so much? Why me bloody?"
I came upon him commiserating, licking those wounds
angry and detached.

"Blue monkey what finds ye on the road today?"
With a last lick and grunt he sneered at me.
"who you and what you care upright man? you no want my answer you just no-zeee, you go now away."

I looked at the poor beast,feeling somewhat sorry for him. I had always heard of the blue monkey and their kind but had never actually met one in person. however, for some reason this one looked somewhat familiar. He had a common look about him.

"Blue monkey, do I know you? Have we ever met before?"
He glared at me with red firey eyes, rising slightly to his haunches. I could tell he was surveying me more closley now.

"Hmmmm, he said, let me see , open mouth upright man, let me sniff... he rose and came closer, pawing at my hair with those damn bloody knuckles.
"Upright man, yes I know ye, you see me many year ago now, you upright man that was my...
how you say... naaaaabore,"

"Naaaaabore, oh, neighbor, huh! whatever do you mean? I have never lived next to a blue monkey in my life!"
The blue monkey looked at me with sad eyes and said,
" I was not Blue monkey then, I live there before I go to war, before the killing, before my hands were bloodied, I need bandage, you got bandage upright man?

I fell back, shocked realizing that this blue monkey, this thing, was my childhood friend, Jeffery.
"Jeffery, My God man, what has happened to you?" We all thought that you had died in the war!
"I did Thomas, I did."
I was a bit unnerved he had called me by my name, he did know who I was after all.
"Jeffery gone long time now, I am all thats left. Me, the how you say... reezult of conflikt, when we make no peace, only war, We become Blue monkey, Knuckles dragging... he paused, and looked at his hands slowly raising them. A tear forming in the corner of his eye. He seemed to have come to some sort of epiphany, a realization...

Reviews

[Rainbowco]

First, I had to discover what Flash Fiction was. From my understanding it is a complete story, with a beginning, a middle and an end, without a large amount of adjectives and adverbs, with at the most 1500 words, but usually under a 1000 words.

So, "We all thought that you had died in the war!" would it work better as "We thought you died in the War"?

Can one be angry and detached at the same time?

I like the idea that war turns men into beasts or in this case blue monkies. I do not care for the unfinished ending of ...

I am looking forward to your polished version, I am sure it will be worth the wait!

I hope I do not offend, but you find something of help from my review.

[Kelsmiles]

Ok, I want more, where's the rest of this story, Bill?
Very interesting intake on reincarnation. I'll be looking forward to the rest of this one.