Chapter 14

"well did you enjoy the ride?"

"mhm. it was fun."

"i dont see how though i mean all we did was sit in the car and talk."

"your point? i mean do we actually ahve to go somewhere to have fun?'

"no but t would have been nice you know?"

"i know."

we walked into his house. it was strangly quiet. but maybe that was because we were the only ones there.

"hmmm i wonder where everyone is?"

"probably out shopping or somehting."

we walked into to his room. i stumbled on some of the things laying on the floor. yup definetly a boys room. i watched Jake come across the room and lay on his bed. he looked tired and kind of annoyed.

"you ok?"

"yeah. just tired of my family is all."

"oh..."

his family was the source of all his problems. they yelled at him and were just plain cruel. i could tell they were fake the mintue i shock the fathers hands. they mentally abused him. thank god not physically. Jake isnt that big. tall yes but  he didnt have much meat on his bones, he was literally skin and bones. i could just imagine the pain he suffers...

i cant actually feel it because well i havent been that way fro a while since i moved with my mom. only thing she does is emotinally and menatlly beat me. but he goes threw it everyday. i dont. only if i fail to please her. my friends love calling my mom the wicked witch. she earned that nick name herself.

i looked at Jake and decided to lay next to him. i layed my head gently on his chest listening to his heart beat. when we hugged it beat at normally pase. but if i were to lay liek i am now on him it speeds up. he says its his nerves and hormons. i bring him pleasure and in more ways then one.

i like making him ahppy. but i really want to please him. and yes i do mean in a sexual manner. i mean if we made each other feel this good just laying or hugging imagine it if we became one for a night. or for the rest of our lives. i do love Jake and i do know he loves me. but i want him and i to show it to one another...

"Ash?" Jake asked interrupting my thoughts.

"Yeah?"

"do you i dont know picture us together in the future. you know with a family?"

"hmm a few times."

"i mean i know you dont want to get you know the m word but would you conciderate with me?"

"like i said its come across my mind a few times."

"mk. i just you know thats all i think about is us. how we are going to be in the future. when that we becomes an us.'

that thought scared me. i was always afriad of getting attached. Jake was the first guy i have actually fallen in love with. and i feel if we broke up my heart and i would vanish. like i told Sam, Jake is my everything. and i just cant go with out him.