#173 (Last Chapter)

 

 

 

               (I've held many dreams growing up. I've rolled them around in my hands, made them maleable in my thoughts. My white-knuckle grip imprinting the whorls of my identity in each of them.)

 

 

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          We were sitting at the old swimming hole. The both of us inevitably thinking the same thoughts. How we used to come here in summers of fresh adult-hood, with our spirits dosed in naivity, our faces newly freed from baby fat. Back when it was an excuse to get drunk in the summer heat. A feeble coctail of fun mixed with freedom. Over the years our close-knit group has scattered. Every person a stitch pulled from the cloth, and we were the only ones left, holding it all together. The others have fallen into marriages, babies, college degrees. I picture those who have given into convention as thumbtacks one would meticulously pin on a 'places you have been' map. It's not that we hadn't been anywhere in the time elapsed. The difference was that for us, it was all just temporary.

 

          I watched her as she circled her feet in the water. Her legs were golden. The sun hitting the fine blonde hairs, reminding me of dandelion fluff. She looked at me and smiled. We were the only ones out at the creek. We commented on how odd this was, being how "back in the day" it was the place to be. I tell her the new generation probably has their own spot. And one day, when they get older, they too will find themselves in company with memories. She makes a little half-laugh at this and I wonder if it's due from sadness or apathy.

 

          We've brought some mildly expensive micro-brews out with us. Being older our tastes have become more refined, even when our lifestyles have not. We make pleasant conversation. Dip into the water every now-and-then, when the beer settles too heavy on our bladders. After a long, mutual silence, she asks me what I want to do with the rest of my life. I see that her eyes have changed. The charismatic sparkle now seems forged. Underneath it all lies confusion. I take a drink to buy some time. I know what the answer is but I'm hesitant to say it. Once it's in the air it earns a life of its own and there's no turning back. She's looking at me almost pleadingly, as if my answer will justify her own hopes. Or will justify that there's any hope left.

 

          So I tell her. I tell her my secret ambition, the one I've kept in my head for two years. She starts to cry. I regret telling her, not because of her tears. But, now that it's been said, I know there's a chance I will fail her as well.

         

 

         

Reviews

[roarke]

That was a great guided tour. I envisioned scenes painted by Edward Hopper or Andrew Wyeth as the lives of your characters unfolded. The kaleidoscope and nickelodeon entrance of each scene added a refreshing originality to your story telling. I'm not one to use names myself, but it just seemed to me names for your characters, introduced in your style, might add to the reminiscent feel. Great writing and story crafting. Thanks.

[Leap]

"The charismatic sparkle now seems forged. Underneath it all lies confusion. I take a drink to buy some time. I know what the answer is but I'm hesitant to say it. Once it's in the air it earns a life of its own and there's no turning back." Brit, you are in a rare and sparse collection of people who I wish I could spend more time with. You are extremely talented, you know that? I re-read every chapter and finished with this which I had not previously read. Bravo, bravo. I wish we had a couple of micro-brews and time to kill and were anywhere in the same vicinity as one another. I am more impressed than you could imagine.

[jenniewren (J.W. Bouwma..]

I picture those who have given into convention as thumbtacks one would meticulously pin on a 'places you have been' map

goddamn that is a gorgeous image! the voice used in this is so soft, and tinged with a patina of sadness.. it is haunting

[DavidRyanM]

"Being older our tastes have become more refined, even when our lifestyles have not." and "I know there's a chance I will fail her as well." Both brilliant lines. I loved this piece. Just a snippet out of an every day life with a meaning behind it that relates to everyone. Well done, sweetheart. And I mean it, both of those sentences are the two best I have read in some time.

[Ed Hart]

for me, a stunning write...a piece of you laid bare, with the spice of introspection