Chapter Three

Mackenzie’s POV 

            I’ve always been able to tell when Adrianna is thinking too hard about something. She gets a distant look in her eyes and she completely tunes everything else out, just focusing on her thoughts and her immediate task at hand; in this case, driving. The brunette will bite on her bottom lip, usually on the right side, and her brows will furrow just slightly enough for me to notice a little wrinkle above her right eyebrow. I honestly think I’m the only one that’s ever noticed, but it’s because I notice everything about her.

            I used to study my girlfriend’s features and quirks any chance there was and I remember one time, she admitted doing the same with me. Most people in high school saw her as an angry Latina with middle child syndrome, but I only ever saw a sweet, loving person. She has never raised her voice to me and tried to never show her rage to anyone around me.

            I’m not dumb, although many people in my past (and present) believe this to be so. I know Ade only ever wanted the best for me and for us and that is why she would put people down and go out of her way to make me smile. While I always would act like it was some big surprise she just randomly thought of, like she wanted me to believe, I always knew how hard she worked to show me her love. I never asked her to, I would tell her that as long as she was by my side I was happy, but she would insist that wasn’t enough. I actually felt bad often, because I couldn’t think up of such elaborate things to give her, but I could always tell she loved my surprises, because I could read her like a book. We could read each other.

            “Penny for your thoughts?” I hear a soft voice question and I clear the clouds from my eyes and realize that I’m staring at the Latina next to me. Her brown eyes are now locked with mine and I just give her a small smile. I can’t believe she’s actually here, with me, right now.

            “You. And how I could always tell when you’re thinking about something big. Want to tell me what you were thinking of?” I tell her honestly, because for the first time in over a year I feel safe. I feel like pieces of my puzzle are fitting back together again and I just can’t bring myself to be dishonest with her since I never have in the past.

            I see her lips turn into a small frown, so small I wonder if I imagined it. “Nothing to worry about right now, mi ángel. We’re at your apartment. Are you ready to go up?” I turn to look out the windshield and I cannot believe I didn’t notice that we were in front of my building. I nod my head to her while unbuckling my seatbelt. I turn to open the door and step out. I seriously feel like such an elephant. Being seven months pregnant, with twins, is absolutely no fun at all.

            “My apartment is on the second floor and the elevator is broken. I feel so bad for asking since I know we haven’t seen or talked to each other in a while, but can you help me? I really don’t think I have the strength or energy to make it up by myself.” I ramble realizing just how tired I am after a long day on my feet and my coworkers nagging me again.

            “Of course I’ll help you, Kenz.” She gives me a reassuring smile as she takes my left hand in hers and puts her right hand on the small of my back as we start taking the stairs, slowly, one by one. “You know, I always knew when you were getting tired, because you would ramble. That’s how I always knew if you needed to nap after a long day at school or go to bed early during the crazy weekends.”

            “But.. but..” This was news to me. I never noticed that she would do those things for me. “I don’t ramble.” I say with my pout that she used to never like used against her.

            “You would pout a lot more too.” She stated trying not to look me in the eyes and I smirk knowing that it still has somewhat of an effect on her. “So, why don’t we go up, I’ll draw you a hot bath and while you’re soaking, I’ll order some Chinese for us. Bueno?” Ugh! She’s got to stop speaking Spanish, because it really is a weakness of mine.

            “Sounds perfect.” I say as we make the rest of the way in relative silence. I take my keys out of my purse and open the front door to my apartment. It’s a one bedroom, since I live alone. All those years in my huge family home, basically by myself. I don’t like too much space. We walk in and I put my purse down on the table next to the door, I place my keys in the bowl next to my purse, and take my shoes off right underneath.

            “Glad to see some things never change.” Adrianna says as she does the same things behind me as she walks in and I go to rest on the couch.

            “What can I say? OCD doesn’t end once you move out of mommy and daddy’s home.” I lay on the couch and close my eyes. “I know I should be a good hostess right now, but I’m really just too tired, Ade. The bathroom is in the hallway to your right. I have take out brochures in the kitchen in the drawer..”

            “Next to the fridge. I remember you would always get upset at Sophie whenever she tried to put them by the phone when she first started working at your house.” She laughs thinking about the time I gave our new maid a 20 minute lecture on why I wanted the pamphlets by the fridge instead. It’s for food. You eat food. Food belongs in the fridge and pantry. There are no drawers in the pantry, the only other logical place would be the drawer by the fridge.

            “It seemed simple in my head.” I reply sheepishly. I look up and she is smiling down at me as she makes her way over to the couch.

            “I thought it was genius.” The brunette whispers before placing a gentle kiss on my forehead. “Don’t fall asleep yet. You need to relax or else you will have restless sleep and that’s not good for you or the baby.” I tense at her words. “Please don’t worry about it now. I’ll be here to talk about it whenever you are ready to. Just take a bath to relax and if you want, then we can take a nap before dinner.”

            “I really missed you, Adrianna.” I blurt out my thoughts as she is looking at me with such love and raw emotion.

            “Mackenzie Lynn, I never stopped thinking about you.” She tells me just before getting up and making her way to my bathroom. I close my eyes for a couple minutes as I hear the water run and her slow, steady movements around my bathroom. Just as I am starting to doze off, I feel a hand on my shoulder. “Hey, your bath is ready.”

            “Thank you.” I say as I sit up and yawn. She holds both her hands out for me to take and I gladly accept the help. She pulls me up and we walk over to the bathroom. I turn to her and see that she is a little hesitant to follow me in. When we dated, we undressed and bathed together and I know now that she just wants me to feel comfortable. “How about I undress and get in and then I’ll call you in. We’ll talk about all this.” I state as I make circles over my ginormous stomach.

            “Okay.” She smiles at me and backs out of the room, closing the door. I undress and I am glad that she left so willingly, even though I knew she wouldn’t fight it, but I’m really self-conscious about my stomach, because I was never this big. Granted, I had curves, but I was fit. I was not a whale. I step into the bubble bath and relax into the water. It really does feel so good. “You can come back in.”

            She walks in and looks like she’s finishing up a text to someone. She puts her phone in her pocket and smiles at me as she grabs a towel to sit on the edge of the tub. The only thing she can really see is the tip of my belly and from my neck up. When she sits down, she silently motions for me to lift my foot, I comply, and she proceeds to give me a foot massage. I involuntarily let out a soft moan because it really does feel so good to be in this bath right now with her, even if she’s not in with me.

            “When are you due?” She asks and my eyes fly open to look at her. She’s not wasting any time, is she? “It must be any day or week now.” She is talking so gently and smooth that I could fall asleep to her voice, just like I used to.

            “Actually, I’m only seven months. I’m having twins.” I look down at the water, but I feel her stop her movements on my foot for a second while she’s trying to take in what I just told her. It’s only for a couple seconds and when her hands switch to my other foot, her questions begin again.

            “And the father?” I can tell she’s trying not to hurt my feelings. She has always been gentle with me in the past, but there was something different about her tone when she was trying to spare my feelings. It was the same tone I would receive after arguments with my parents when we first met. I can feel the tears start to pool in my eyes and I choke back a sob.

            “He knows.. um.. about the pregnancy, just not a-about how m-many. He hasn’t.. um.. s-spoken to me since I.. f-found out.” I am fully sobbing now and I feel her wrap herself as much as she could around me, since the tub is in the way. I really want to tell her the truth, but I know she will get really angry and I don’t like it when she’s angry. She gets really quiet and usually someone ends up in the hospital and she would be suspended by the end of the day.

            “Shh.. calm down, Kenzie. It’s not a problem, you’ll get through this. I’ll make sure of it. I’m here now and I won’t let anyone else hurt you or these babies.” I tense again in her arms and I know she felt it, because she leans back to study my face. I can’t bring myself to make eye contact with her though. She’ll know everything as soon as I do.

            It’s like she can read my thoughts though, because she brings two fingers underneath my chin and gently pushes my head up so I look into her eyes. It only takes a second and I can see her whole demeanor change before me. Brown eyes, get dark, not in a sensual way, but in a mad way. Her shoulders pull back slightly and she straightens out her back. She tilts her head to the side slightly, “He didn’t.”

            It’s not a question, but more of a knowing statement and my tears spill out over my cheeks again as my truth is brought to light. Her body bristles for a second before she brings herself back to me. I bury my head into my hands and try to calm myself down. After a few seconds, I feel her gentle fingers run through my tangled hair and she starts singing our old song to me. “..you are the best thing that’s ever been mine.”

            When she finishes, I realize I’m no longer crying and she is smiling softly at me. “Why don’t we finish up this bath and we can lay down on the couch?” She asks. “Sure.” She grabs the cup on the side of the tub and starts to wash my hair. I relax into her hands as she rinses the soap out. She leaves the room as I wash my body. I drain the water and get out of the tub. I see that she brought some pajamas in for me.

            After I’m dressed and my hair is brushed, I open the door and see Adrianna sitting on the couch texting someone again. “She probably has someone else. I’m wasting her time. She shouldn’t be here with me instead of with them.” I think sadly to myself, because the truth is I want her here with me. I feel home again with her. I feel whole again for the first time in two years.

            “You don’t have to stay with me if someone needs you. Really, I’ll be fine. Thank you for everything. I’ll give you my number though and we can keep in touch. I wasn’t lying when I said I missed you.” I look at her sadly as I sit on the opposite end of the couch.

            “And I wasn’t lying to you,” she says as she moves towards me, “when I said I never stopped thinking about you. I promise you, no one needs me right now. I’m here with you and I’ll stay with you as long as you need me.” She wraps her arms around me and leans us so we are laying across the couch. She has her arms wrapped protectively around me and is holding my hands on top of my swollen belly.

            “Are you sure? I don’t want to keep you from your boyfriend.. or girlfriend.” I whisper the second part because I can’t help, but be a little jealous if she had another girlfriend, because as far as I knew, we were each other’s first and only girlfriends.

            I hear and feel her laugh behind me, “From the bottom of my heart, there is no significant other in my life. I was just texting my mom and dad.” I smile when I hear that because I am glad about the first part and a little nostalgic about the second. I always loved Lorena and Rafael. “I really don’t want to upset you, love, but I really just want to get this all out of the way right now, so we can move past it. Sí?” I hesitate for a second, but eventually nod my head. Just to get it all out there. If she decides I’m too much work and wants to run, at least I was honest, right?

            “His name was Kyle. I met him when I went out to NYC for college. We got along great and he really did treat me so well. We were friends for about three months before he asked me out… and I said yes.” I am doing everything in my power not to break down right now, so I focus on her heartbeat I hear against my left ear. It is so steady and soothing. Like I always remember it. I want all this out in the open and off my chest. “After about a month of dating, I noticed small changes. He would hold my hand tighter or grab my arm if other guys were around me. He would get really upset and jealous of anybody I hung out with. It got really bad one day, after we had been dating for about four months, I went to lunch with Samantha and Eric, you remember them right? Our friends from high school?” She nods her head against mine.

            “Well, he found us in the campus cafe and was convinced that I was cheating on him with Eric. Capital G, gay, Eric. I didn’t know any of this until I went back to my dorm afterwards and he was waiting for me in the hallway. He looked so furious, but I couldn’t bring myself to walk away. I figured we would just talk about what was upsetting him. When we walked into my dorm, he grabbed me by my hair and he pushed me onto the bed. He started yelling at me about how I was a s**t and a w***e and that I didn’t deserve him because I was filthy. I pleaded with him that Eric was just a high school friend and that he was gay, but it just made him more upset. Before I could even react, I felt the back of his hand hit the side of my face.” I absentmindedly brought my left hand up to my cheek.

            “He got in my face and said that if I didn’t close my legs to whoever asked for me, that I would get it worse next time. He turned around and left my dorm.” I wipe my face and realize that I am crying, I can feel Adrianna’s chest heaving behind me. I know she is really upset over what happened, but also pissed at him for doing it. “I avoided him for weeks, I even came back home to visit my family for a long weekend. I told Quinn what happened, but she shrugged it off and said that I was exaggerating it.” I feel her inhale and I know she’s about to say something. I lean my head back and kiss the side of her jaw. “I know you don’t like her, honey, but I really just want to finish this or else I know I never will be able to.”

            “Okay, I’m sorry.” She stated.

            “When I got back from my trip, he was waiting at the airport with a bouquet of roses and a stuffed frog.”

            “Well, if he really cared about you at all, he’d know you were allergic to roses and your favorite animal is a monkey.” She scoffed and I smile at her words.

            “I know, but I let him have his moment. He was so apologetic and he even cried saying that he didn’t mean any of it, he had a bad day, and if he could take it all back he would….. So, I accepted his apology and I took him back. Three weeks went by without one incident. One night, we were at a Halloween party, playing spin the bottle, and things were getting a little heated. When we finally left, we went back to my dorm and we slept together.” I feel myself starting to cry again. “It hurt so bad and it was so rough. I hated it and I had alcohol coursing through me. I just laid there and let him do his thing. From what I remember, the whole experience was over in nine minutes. He rolled off of me and fell asleep.”

            “I’m so sorry, Mackenzie.” I hear her choke out and I know she’s crying. I feel her arms tighten around my stomach as well. Again, I focus on her heartbeat. Since I can’t look into her eyes right now, it’s the only thing tethering me to her and the reality of now.

            “It’s okay. What’s done is done. The next three weeks continue like that, without the sex. I would just keep coming up with excuses, we could go to dinner, but I’d always be too tired to go back to his dorm or my roommate was in mine. After five weeks, I started getting sick, but I just chocked it up to the flu, but deep down I knew something wasn’t right. I went through it all for one more week, until I took a test.. actually more like six pregnancy tests. All positive. I didn’t want to tell him though, even though it was my first and only time with a guy, I knew he would call me those horrible names that I didn’t like.”

            I hear her sniffle behind me and I wipe the tears off my cheeks. “He went away for a long vacation and I came home for the holidays. I didn’t tell anyone, not even Tyler, even though I hoped he’d be able to help. I was so ashamed. I had to tell Kyle though. So when I went back to school, the first time we met up at my dorm, I told him straight out. He was even more mad than the whole thing with Eric… I can’t tell you, Ade. I can’t.”

            I cry and turn to look her in the eyes. “Kenzie, baby, I know it’s hard, but I need to know. I need to know what he did so that way I know how to protect you in the future. I pray to God he doesn’t come back, but what if he does. I need to know.” It takes a couple seconds, but I nod my head and turn to settle back into her chest.

            “He grabbed me by my arms and slammed me into the wall. He grabbed a fistful of my hair and pushed me onto the bed. He kept on slapping my face and finally he punched me in the stomach, before turning to leave. He got to the door, turned to me and said, "Now then, maybe we won’t have to worry about that now, will we?” I wipe my tears again and I turn to look at Adrianna after a couple of minutes of silence and she looks furious. She’s no longer crying, she just looks really mad. This is exactly what I didn’t want to happen.

            “What did you do?” She asked flatly. I can hear her heartbeat racing and I know she’s upset, but it’s still calming me enough not to freak out and have an attack.

            “I got on the first plane back home. My parents called their attorney and we pressed charges. He was in jail for a whole month before his parents bought him out, his paperwork says he got time for ‘good behavior.’ I really don’t want to talk anymore, Bubbles. I’m really tired.” I say with a sob, because I know the next part of the story is a whole other ballgame and it’s not something I want to talk about now.

            She checks the time on her phone as I turn to lay sideways in her arms with my stomach resting over her stomach and legs. “Okay.” She kisses the top of my head. “It’s three o'clock. How about we take a nap for a couple hours before dinner?” I nod my head and close my eyes. I feel her wipe my tear stained cheeks with the pad of her thumb. Just as I was about to fall asleep, I hear her whisper, “Kenzie, I am so sorry I wasn’t there for you. I am so upset by all of this and I will find a way to make things better for you. I promise. I’m just glad your family was finally there to help you through something. Like they always should have been.”

            A lone tear escapes from my eye as I fall into a restless sleep.

Author's Note

Honestly, I'm in such a slump with this story and I haven't been able to write in it for about two years, but it's a goal of mine to finish, because it's the first thing I've ever written. Any constructive reviews could help or anything that would be cool to write about in future chapters. Thanks!