Crucify My Heart

my heart aches

breaking as the words sink in

knowing things will never change

I still put my heart out there

wishing 

for once

you would love me

protect me

be proud of me

each time i glue my heart back together

another piece shatters

how much of my heart do you want to pulverize

all my issues

come back to you

and 

the horrible things that have been said and done

I'm at a loss

what can I do 

to make you love me

the way I love you

what is so wrong with me

that you can't stand the sight of me

I've tried to make myself

into what you want

changed everything about me

just to make you happy

to acknowledge me

to see someone besides them

have I ever had your love?

your respect?

your pride?