I smile now

A poem reflecting the struggles of young adoration

I smile when I look down now,
He changed that about me 

Accept the call? Decline the call?
My finger hovered over the accept button 
Just do it, go for it, I talked myself into it 

You are connected...
My heart skipped one too many beats with the soft echo of his voice
My eyes were fixed on the boy who was just a 3 dimensional image
My brain tried to reject how the rest of my body reacted

I could have cared less that he was hours away
I could have cared less about what people would think
I could have cared less that he didn't know how I felt
I felt something and that, that was new

Days went by and our conversation never died
The peaceful voices, the loud chuckles, the innuendoes 
I barley knew him, yet my life story just slips out 
I have no filter, no burning desire to stop 

Then it changed
The night he told me about her
It really hit hard,
How do I react to the way he felt about that girl
How might I contend, blonde hair, blue eyes
She was everything to him, all I would never be 

Breathe in, breathe out
time to leave my sorrows and my doubt 
but it just isn't that easy,
I begin to ponder;

When he falls into a sweet slumber do I enter his dreams like he does mine?
Does his breathe catch in his throat when I message him?
A plethora of questions that will never be answered
So why bother? 

4 months is all it takes to fall in love they say 
but what if 56 days in, I'm already in love
Have I wasted 1344 hours on someone who doesn't care? 

I should distance myself I know I should,
We live 7953 miles apart that's far enough
but it won't stop the feelings 

When I looked down now I smile
I smile because he slips into my mind
I smile because his accent is imprinted on my brain
I smile because the conversation were never dry
I smile because for some reason this Australian girl is head over heels for a Canadian boy. 

Reviews

[NEHA]

A young love can certainly be meandering...a bond of both honey and pepper
you've pictured that so vividly!
I appreciate your thoughts with a warm "wow"!
#claps