The Demise of Truth

 

In this mortal coil exists such a location,

Of self-told lies and much deviation.

 Deviation from the truth of our existence,
of our actions and of our subsistence.
Such a place would lead to demise,
As all of your self-told lies take a rise.

Allow not your lascivious mind,
To lure you on a trip of such a kind,
Down a road to the torpidity of your truth,
Leading to untruth and self-told lies.
For once the sorrowful trip has been taken,
None will listen to nor hear your cries.

Douse not even your toe in the grime,
In which this location lies.
To do so shall be your crime,
And none shall hear your cries.
Such a place has claimed those on trial,
For many have drowned in a river of denial

Reviews

[David Lewis Paget]

Well, well, wella, Bella! I'm impressed! So different from your free form verse, and showing much discipline. My only criticism is of the final line of the first verse. 'As all of your self-told lies take a rise.' Take a rise? Get rid of it, it destroys the line and damages the poem. The line should end with 'self-told lies', which means that you would have to restructure the rest of the line to make it fit.
But I love the final two lines -
'Such a place has claimed those on trial,
For many have drowned in a river of denial.'
Great stuff!

[Jessica L Auster]

I enjoyed reading this. It's very well written.

[Brenda Sue]

Wonderfully written. Great job.

[Phil Sanders]

Brilliantly written .. what beautiful use of words ....