~Only God Can Judge Me~

True story...

I came of birth to live my own path,

My own life, my destiny and which ever goal my hand would grasp,

However, as I walked past thousands of eyes,

I ended up in my room with unwanted cries,

In my teen years, I felt as if my feelings were invisible, speechless and worthless,

Though I knew we're not all perfect,

But the thoughts of maiming my life was lurking inside,

The thoughts of helplessness and no pride,

The thoughts of watching my own blood falling from my flesh or pulling the trigger towards my face,

But as my heart prevent me from falling from grace,

This desperate side of me wants put out my own misery,

Without any trace or remains of me,

And the mother of mine with love and care,

I continued on climbing up life's stairs,

But deep inside, an anger grows,

I'd barely exposed it to friends and foes,

As days went by, this dark side of me which was once this sad little girl,

My happiness suddenly scatters away like dropped pearls,

With my fists clenched, my mind's racing as if it's on amphetamine,

But my friendliness and smiles covers the hatred towards today's society,

Every face that I've met after a conflict,

The sick part of me wants to break their necks or get their throats slit,

As my heart pumping hard and my blood boiling in insanity,

But the brand new day helds me back from the monstrasity,

As I've came of age to not to hold the grudges and always pick yourself up when down,

My new life begins and many opportunities found,

I came of birth to live my own path,

My own life, my own destiny and which ever goal my hand would grasp.

 (October 16th, 2011)