A Lamp to my Feet

A Poem by Joshua Clement

Just a pouring out of what's inside...

It happens so gradually
Turning from the Lord
He calls out to me
Wanting to love me
But I keep seeking death

I feel like doing this
I feel like doing that
"I feel" is robbing me
Or rather, I rob myself away
From the one who bought me

Where are my eyes?
Why can I not see?
I have sought the darkness
And have wandered from my lamp

And now I am made sport
My strength is gone
My words are useless
My prayers fail

And what can be done?
I cannot change the past
Nor pay for my evil
Once again I am humbled and ashamed

Where are my eyes
So that I may learn
And take to heart all these things
And never return to this folly?

Wicked and Lazy
Wicked for I have desired my will
Lazy for I have not fought against the approaching darkness
Nor have I readied myself against this folly

I do not despair
I do not lose hope
Though I have acted wickedly
For in my heart I want to please the Lord

And I am willing to learn
I am willing to ready myself
I am willing to fight
The Lord deserves better than what I have given Him

The Lord desires me
Let me give Him my heart
The lord loves me
Let me give him my eyes

Let me find my lamp again
In the words of your commands
They are a light to my feet
And a Guard to my heart

By your words my sword is ready
My heart is kept safe
And by your words I see clearly
"...not what I will, but that your will be done."