Forgotten

Feeling not so special today :(

Hey you! Over here, I still care

Did you forget me?

Don't you dare!

I have not forgotten you.

Just waiting to see.

If I matter much to your heart,

To see it through.

Maybe you're slipping away,

Love splitting apart?

Its OK I am used to being forgotten,

It's just another gloomy day.

Reviews

[David Scott]

A cry for help... This is good to do. If we are afraid to ask we will be left to wonder. It does feel a bit needy, but this is not a bad or a good thing. It just is what it is.
Now, to be open to a loving response or to be ready to listen if we get a cry for help in return.
Good to read you work today.

[Bohrium Guy]

Thanks David and for taking the time to review my stuff.

[Romalina]

Its well written and It gives me a very good feeling :) good work!!

[Bohrium Guy]

Thank you for the kind review.

[Rose Jaeger Kaneki]

amazing, beautiful, and sad all= this poem. love this poem........

[Bohrium Guy]

Thanks Silver. Have a great day.

[Rose Jaeger Kaneki]

welcome, you have a amazing day

[IamRealTusoul]

Deep words...beautifully written

[Bohrium Guy]

Thank you for the review and kind words...

[IamRealTusoul]

Its my pleasure, always...

[McBear]

Very sad but can be true a lot. Very emotionally deep. I know how this feels. *Places hand on your shoulder* If you need someone to talk to, I am here. I hope you don't mind a critique, I have a little one.

If I matter much to your heart,
To see it thru. ** Thought that maybe you should use "through" instead.

Maybe your slipping away, ** "You're" is supposed to be used here.
Love splitting apart?



Its OK I am used to being forgotten,

It's just another gloomy day.

[Bohrium Guy]

Thanks for both the critique and review. I am always cool with critique as long as its done in a positive manner. So said I will make the changes. I have a bad habit of just writing and posting immediately so my grammar, thoughts and punctuation kinda go south sometimes....ok all the time. I just write raw :)

[McBear]

That is completely understandable! I always do my critique in a positive way so people wont be offended

[Bohrium Guy]

It's actually nice to be corrected, it shows someone actually reads my sheet. ;)

[McBear]

I agree. People can honestly just take one word from another persons chapter like "deep, cool and very wordy" and rearange that for a comment without even reading the thing at all.

[Bohrium Guy]

Yep, you caught my drift exactly.... And take notice some write lovely reviews but then when they score the piece they do so at 50 so you actually take a bigger hit to your overall score. It's sad the games that play on here.

[maria ( rose)]

There are many unspeakable words, forgotten, or forbidden.
Great thanks to the poets who make them all become reachable!! -maria

[Bohrium Guy]

Thanks for the review :)

[maria ( rose)]

You're welcome :)