I - Come and Sit by the Fire...

'Come and sit by the fire and I will tell you my story'

 'I am old now and my bones are cold, but the warmth from the fire gives me enough strength and in it there is a light, there is a memory and a tale to tell. Looking into the flames, my eyes are taken away and I am in the world of the past. Although it was many years ago, it is a clear and unerring place and it is as though it was only yesterday. First of all, I will always remember the place of my birth.'

[][][][]

 

The southern British kingdom of Arun was all too aware of the imminent invasion from mainland Europa and so prepared itself for war. Its king, Duerra had three sons and he used each for a different aspect of the preparation. The eldest son, Alfos was to make ready for war and so spent much of his time amassing an army and constructing defences. The second son, Bezon was given the task of gathering information and was sent abroad as a spy, under the guise of a peace envoy offering a truce. The third son, Caratacos, who was considered a fool and a weakling was in charge of the elderly king's escape route; should it be necessary.

 

In Rome, at the heart of the empire of Italia a new emperor named Cicero had been appointed and as all emperors before him he needed to find a way to prove himself, to prove he had been in office, to make a permanent mark so he would be remembered in the pages of history. He had come to power when the empire had grown to its fullest, quite naturally, over a period of several centuries. All the countries in the known world that could provide benefit to Rome were conquered and part of a huge supply chain. It seemed there was nothing more to do, but looking over at the map of the world again, his eyes were in some desperation drawn to the outlying extremities of the empire. There was the cold and desolate island, sub-continent of Briton, that according to most recent surveillance was inhabited only by savages and feuding tribes. It had nothing to offer in terms of produce and certainly posed no threat, but it would make a morale boosting victory and expansion, if conquered. Further up the map, to the north of already colonised Germania, the icy Norselands sat, waiting to be plucked. They also posed no threat, but would nicely complete the Italia map of its empire. Then to the west the recent uprising in already colonised Spania needed to be quashed; it was unacceptable and could not be seen to be allowed to continue. These three remaining areas of Europa would be perfect for Cicero’s opening address, all he had to do was sell the benefit of expansion to the fickle masses in the main arena as part of his inauguration ceremony.

 

‘Now you are sat in the warm let the story go on’ 

 

Author's Note

Over 4000 views - Thank-you

Story of 34 chapters. Version 1 completed Saturday 1/1/22, being released as an E-book on Amazon

Reviews

[Michael Keyes]

In interesting opening, certainly has me curious and wanting to read more. Only a couple of things I want to mention with this chapter:

. "He had come to power at a time when the empire had grown to its fullest, quite naturally over a period of time". I don't think you need to use "time" twice in this sentence. Also, perhaps you could specify how long the Empire has been growing?

. "Further up the map the Norselands sat, waiting to be plucked, they also posed no threat, but would complete the Italia map of Europa." I think this sentence would be better as two. "...waiting to be plucked. They also posed no..."

Besides that, this is a good opening chapter and I'm curious to read on.

[MomzillaNC]

Interesting that you named your emperor for a philosopher who was assassinated for his speeches AGAINST the Roman emperor.

NOTES: Some of your sentences are run-ons. I recommend breaking them down into multiple sentences.

[BL]

Thank you for your review, I will look at and adjust. I appreciate your views

[MomzillaNC]

yw :)

[BL]

Yw? Please do not relate to Roman history, this story is completely fictional and only has references when handy for me :-)

[MomzillaNC]

YW = You're welcome. And, I'll keep in mind that this is fiction. But, I do think any reader even moderately versed in history is going to draw similar comparisons. You might want to further differentiate your place names in a final draft before publication.

[BL]

The fact that you have picked up on that is good and the reaction I wanted. Which place names should I change?

[MomzillaNC]

It's your story. But, if it was me, I'd come up with completely original place names.

[BL]

I see what you mean, got any ideas?

[MomzillaNC]

Maybe something akin to lesser known place names. For example, instead of "Italia" you could use something like "Etruscia" from "Etruscan." I think most folks aren't that familiar with Etruscan and Rome gobbling up the Etruscan territories was the catalyst for the iconic Roman cultural development. Maybe pull one of the old Celtic names for British-esque territories in your story. For example, if you have a Spanish-ish territory, look to the Carthaginian or Celto-Iberian place names.

[Belle]

I really enjoyed reading this first chapter! You weave in the context of your world effortlessly, retaining a sense of realism but also creating a mystical atmosphere. I have no complaints about your narrative; it's fantastic! My only qualm would be a small grammar mistake - you have written "it's king, Duerra" when you should have put "its king, Duerra". "It's" is the abbreviated form of "it is". Otherwise, wonderful work!

[GC]

Alof
Bezon
Caratacos
Duerra

have we a viking narrating the story called Erik ? :)

nice writing B. will read on

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Very interesting story, B. You write very well. English is not my native language, but I've understood it all. Very well done. :) Rudi

[BL]

Thanks Rudi, I appreciate your comments

[ANTO]

A good start to this tale - nothing disagreeable at all B.
All good my friend.

[BL]

That is nice to hear thank you

[wordman]

I love short stories and this one is great

[BL]

Thank you for reading

[wordman]

you are welcome

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the way you begin the chapter. Best stories are told by a storyteller. I like the history given. Made me want to know and read more. A very good introduction. You have my attention.
Coyote

[BL]

Thank you there will be more and I am glad to have you with me