Sunday May 18, 2008

My name is Bluedaizy. I'm not really a "writer" but I have a lot of crap in my head and I hope putting it out there will get it out of my head.  Just a theory.  Time will tell.  Yeah, I'm full of cliches too.

 

I'm a 45 year old woman, single, white, five foot eleven inches and a half, 240 pounds.  I refer to myself as a BIG GIRL.  I'm the oldest of five and a step adult siblings.  Today I have golden brown short hair which I'm growing out for Locks of Love.  That's my excuse for being cheap.  The place I go to cuts your hair for free if you donate 11 inches of hair.   I have 10 more inches to go.  Next year I'm going platinum or maybe red.  Plenty of time to make THAT decision. 

 

Like I said, I'm not really a writer.  My dad had aspirations.  He wrote about 30 poems and I believe he wanted to publish, but didn't think they were good enough.  I'm going to share them with everyone as time passes, maybe.  I hate to commit as I could change my mind or feel it'll take too much work.  He wanted to write that "Great American Novel", too, but we couldn't find any trace of that after he passed.

 

My mother is into geneology and wants to write about her family.  She said she didn't know where to start.  I think that's code for "will you do it, daughter?"  I told her I'd take a stab at it, but she's going to have to record information she wants in our family history.  Besides, I think it would be great to have her voice recorded for posterity.  I used to have some old tapes of my dad on voice messages he left on my answering machine (god bless the 80s), but I must have thrown them out.  I'm a pack rat.  I rarely throw anything away, but in my last move I must have pitched them.  My heart aches thinking I'll never hear his voice again.  How much you want to bet I don't pitch anything ever again?  If you could see my house, you wouldn't take that bet.

 

So, this is supposed to be some kind of journal and I want to focus on what's happening today.  I got out of bed around 9:00 am and made some breakfast.  I had egg white scrambled eggs with ham, onions, cheese and garlic. I drank a large glass of orange juice.  It tasted like real oranges were squeezed fresh just for me and not bought out of a store.  Then I took my daily vitamins and felt like taking a nap, so I made a pot of coffee.  I'm feeling guilty thinking about it.  I drank the whole thing and used that International Delight coffee sweetner.  I was recently diagnosed as diabetic and know I should drink the sugar free stuff, but I just can't bring myself to be that strong.  So I have to rely on meds to reduce my sugar level. I hate taking drugs, but I can't deny that I feel a whole lot healthier since taking them.  I've also lost 25 pounds.  I'm hoping in a few more months I can lose some more weight and get off the meds.

 

I straightened up the house before lunch.  You know, made the bed, gathered up the dirty laundry, picked up the trash.  But I still have a ton more work to do.  I went to the grocery store because I wanted fixings for beef barley soup and I needed change for the laundry mat trip I'm postponing to write this.  I put out some bread to rise and finished the barley soup.  It will be a wonderful lunch this week.  At lunch today, I had leftover barbeque chicken and some sugar free pudding.  I started to feel a bit nauseous so I went to lay down and read James Patterson's Honeymoon.  It was pretty good.  I've been reading it all week.  Finally finished it this afternoon.  I actually think the ending was a little too neat and "happily ever after".  Must have had a tight deadline to get it done.

 

I have spent hours on the computer today checking out ebay, MySpace and just surfin the net in general. I really need to spend more time doing physical stuff if only working in the yard.  I don't think dragging dirty laundry to the laundry mat counts.

 

I need to get back to "work".  Laundry, trash, litter box and filing don't do themselves, unfortunately.  I don't know how people with children and significant others do it.  I'm exhuasted just thinking about that work that needs doing.  Maybe I'll win the lottery....it could happen.