Whisper

Social Commentary

You watch and wane
Curse and complain
About how the world has you strain
And you've had enough of the pain
Your accomplishments disdain
From hatred you cannot refrain
Cant clean so you smear the bloodstain
You say its too much to sustain

We all have battles, there are those we cannot win alone
Do not whisper, but SHOUT and let you heart felt desires known

If the schemer plots, make his plan be foiled
Dont let the slothful slide, snobbish are the spoiled
If you see the slayer kill, reveal him
Catch the theif with his loot, before he conceals them

These are the things in the world that threaten us
A mere needle that sticks us that gets crisper
Why does evil prosper? We whine and fuss
One reason is quite simple........We whisper

Reviews

[AYVID N]

So let's shout!
A greatly motivational message from you. The first stanza does flow beautifully and the last line packs the punch. My compliments on the well-written poem.

[Eloha]

The first stanza is very good rhyming I've ever ever read some.

Love it! Very nice rythm...and the words go great.

[Celestine Night]

I love the the flow of this and it is so true

[Rachael]

One thing, I think you should add in the apostrophe's into the contractions; just to have more proper English, of course no contractions would do that better. On another note, the flow of this was quite good. Almost that I could hear a faint kind of music in the background as I was reading. Well done.

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

I agree with the comment below me. I still think it is good though. Thanks for sharing :)

[MissWordSmith]

The first stanza was particularly nice.
The rhyming too was steady. overall, a good poem, but in my opinion not your best

[A.Lee]

This is really good. I like the use of rhyme. You did a good job with the first stanza, that was a lot of rhymes for one word and it didn't sound too forced. A little repetitive, but you ended it just in time for it to not be annoying. I also liked that you didn't use the same rhyme scheme for each stanza. Nice work.

[Ama May Cooper]

The poem itself is good , the meaning true and filling. Although i have to admit that the ryhming seems somewhat forced, like at times you simply scratched for things that ryhmed and forgot about meaning x

[Ruth]

Awesome!
I LOVE this1
So true, we all have to take a stand - together - unite and peacefully retaliate! Silence must get lonely lol Time to scream!
xx