Daniel's Odyssey

Kind of a fan-fiction based on a song I enjoy.

My name is Daniel. Let me tell you what happened. I was never what you would call a “ladies’ man”. In fact, I was generally inept with women, ever since 1956. Then one of my buddies suggested I go see this specialist he knew of. He told me she could help me out a great deal. So I took my troubles to her. She had a sign on her shop which only had her name, “Madam Rue”. With a shrug I went inside.

The inside of the shop smelled kind of musty and it was pretty dark. Much of it was filled with odds and ends and there was a beaded curtain leading to the back. The bell above the door rang so I figured it wouldn’t be long before she appeared. As soon as she did it seemed like I was taken back to the 1800’s or something. She was a Gypsy, plain and simple. And one of her teeth was capped in gold. She smiled and beckoned me closer. With a silent curse towards my friend I did so.

After hearing my plight Madam Rue took me to the back. Once back there I actually longed for the musty smell up front. Not that it was truly ‘bad’ but it was over-powering to say the least. She reached out and took a hold of my hand then turned it to look at my palm. She made some sort of sign over it with her other hand as she mumbled then nodded.

“What you need is Love Potion Number 9,” she said with a smile. At least, I think it was a smile.

She moved to a work bench which was filled with all sorts of vials and containers. Pulling a kettle closer to her she began putting drops of this and that into it. Then she bent to get a bottle of something from a chest. As she straightened up she turned and winked at me then poured out a cupful of the stuff.

“I’m just going to mix it up here in the sink and it will be ready,” she told me then did so. After a few minutes of pouring the cup slowly into the mixture while she stirred it she took an empty vial from a cupboard and carefully poured the concoction into it then stoppered it.

She approached me with that ‘smile’ of hers then handed me the vial. It looked black as Indian ink then I took out the stopper and had to hold it away. The smell reminded me of turpentine and I seriously considered leaving right then and there. She motioned for me to drink some and I let out a sigh. Pinching my nose tight I closed my eyes and took a drink. It was nastier than it smelled. I drank about half of it and put the stopper back in then waited for a moment but nothing happened.

“It will help you. Go on with you now.” I looked at the vial in my hand then shrugged and left the shop as I put it in my pocket.

I stood outside for several moments waiting for something to happen. She said it was ‘Love Potion Number 9’. What happened with one through eight? Would it cause women to be attracted to me? There were several women walking along the street but they never gave me a second glance. I started walking towards home. A few blocks from the store something started happening. It was like seeing the world in a whole new way. Then things seemed to get darker, then brighter. I had no idea if it was day or night but continued walking. Some old woman was passing by, walking her dog. I couldn’t help it I just walked right up and kissed her. Then, for good measure I picked up her dog and kissed it too.

That lamppost there kept things bright at night. It deserved a kiss certainly! And that stop sign kept things orderly. Another kiss! That door kept the weather out. Another kiss! Everything I passed deserved a kiss and I did so with such deep emotion. That police officer standing on the corner of 34th & Vine kept the criminals at bay by his presence. He most certainly needed a kiss.

After a startled moment he grabbed me by the arm. I tried to tell him that I had taken some love potion and even pulled out my vial. But he took it and threw it onto the ground, breaking it and spilling my potion. Then he hauled me off to jail. By the time we got there the potion had worn off and here I now sit.

I’m thinking of going to Madam Rue for another vial. This one is going into my buddy’s drink. Let’s see how he likes that!