Fallen Death

It sounds better in a way if you read it sort of fast.

 Once I've fallen

Never did I get up

I laid there 

Waiting for someone to help me

With this pain

These headaches

My heart shattered 

Into millions of pieces

Because of you

Betrayed me behind my back

I can not move

For I am stuck

In this fucked up world

Wanting to be in yours for entirnety

You've lied

I can not forgive you

Help me anyone

For I will die here 

And enter a world which I am not ready for

 

Reviews

[BLACKCRUSH]

It is short but I like short poems as long as there meaningful .
" I can not move
for I am stuck in
this fucked up world
Wanting to be yours for
eternity "
The writer lets us know that the character in the poem was let down and betrayed by someone she loved, she wants desperately to be with that person even though it angers her some. I think this was a good poem overall.

[nightmask]

this reminds me of cinderella and prince charming and how she was so dependent on him and this is like a twist in the story really well done :] maybe you could make it a bit longer?

[Drake Hyman]

Psalm 143
I Read this when I felt somewhat like your poem.