This is incredibly strong and I can tell that it's heartfelt and passionate. I won't lie - I really needed this. For the only person who has stuck around with you through all of it is yourself. You are the person who dragged your body out of bed, who fed you when you didn't want to eat, who held you when you were crying. Truly, truly beautiful message.
One thing, and one thing only. You may want to look again at the punctuation in the final stanza, as the sentence feels incomplete. Perhaps replace the period with a comma, and make "failing support from anyone else" a separate clause. Other than that, fantastic job!
This is wonderful, BlankCypher! I love this poem, I love deep, meaningful poems that come from the heart, this poem was so nice, I can completely relate to this piece, which strengthened my understanding of it all the more. Very good writing, keep it up!
Posted 10 Years Ago
10 Years Ago
Thanks man, it's the kind of thing that just comes straight from life you know? :)
This is a beautiful poem. The imagery in this is wonderful, and the way it is written is really to make the reader think, which is one of my favorite things about it! Another awesome one. Well done.
BlankCypher, How does the addressed of the poem "Cross the line [he or she/they/ we/or I] once drew?
I see that in the Irish tongue I see that 'do chorp' means 'your body' an interesting spelling 'do' means you and chorp like body/core/corps. I have to be very selecting w/ my words of translation because today I am trying to study Danish (Danes: 'handske(n)' means 'glove'; 'dyreven' means' animal lover'
I would like to call up our Irish words for heart, very strange to understand how the translation informs this:
19 years old, musician and poet by trade, I don't really do much else/
I absolutely love music and writing, creativity is life.
I have been writing poetry any time that I need to for roughly 5/6.. more..