Bloody Snow

You try to figure it out.

I gazed at wondrous snow, dazzling and powdery,

Surrounded by copses of pine and cedar, hands shaking,

Bitter thoughts and a deep chill pervading my bones,

While tree's stood whispering, covered in a white haze, snow.

I could see the rivers composed of blood, amidst the flurries

Of Winter and snow.

Yet there was red pooling 'neath my standing feet, dark,

I could not comprehend, to see through the blood river,

To truly find my way out of this crimson waste, wading,

Through the eddies and whirls contained within.

The blood gathered wider than before, circling me,

Trapping me with its barrier, rising higher and higher,

Slowly.

Soon I made to swim, but it would never let me go,

Soon I knew I would drown in a river of blood, gurgling

And choking on everything, my past loves, failures.

The blurring whiteness began to swallow me whole.

Author's Note

I'm finished revising this. So let me know if you can figure this poem out :P
Would appreciate reviews and feedback greatly.

Reviews

[apennylate]

Amazing... Takes me to an ethereal place of harsh biting cold, filled with frost demons and hopes frozen on a pike... Your lines remind me of blood magic, and the word choice, coupled with the easy breathed rhythm of rhyme, lends to a stark picture of a ritual gone bad... Whatever the meaning... It is penned with macabre precision...

[Lovecraft]

Heh, I enjoyed this review, lol.

Thanks. By the way, is "Noize" based on a Key and Peele Sketch?

[apennylate]

Well thank you, not as much as I enjoyed reading your work. No, I actually had to go look that up, lol... But I am an avid gamer, "Noizemare" was one of my main names back when I essentially lived in WoW... My main tag is "Dogmaizkool", read backwards it is "LookzIamGod"... Between the two, they are essentially my other names, hah... Even if I do not really game as much anymore...

[Lovecraft]

Hell, I still play the original Fallout game from 1998 and Baldur's Gate 2: Shadows of Amn.

[apennylate]

Oh hell yeah, that is amazing, lol... Great games... Gotta love gaming!

[Lovecraft]

Very much so. I also play the original Deus Ex with the Shifter mod.

[FIN]

Loss of purity and consumed by lust.

Loved the imagery of this piece.

Much love,

LR

[Lovecraft]

Thank you, Water Elemental! ;)

[FIN]

"Death" of oneself, as well, perhaps.

And no problem, Mr. Lovecraft.

Much love,

LR

[FIN]

Or an epiphany into the truths of your past relationships.

Given that last line "of being swallowed by whiteness."

[Lovecraft]

It has several meanings. Metaphorically he did die though. I prefer it to be whatever the reader senses as to its meaning. ;)

[FIN]

Ah, I see. I was trying to get at your intended expression though. (;

Much love,
read moreAh, I see. I was trying to get at your intended expression though. (;

Much love,

LR

[Coyote Poetry]

Snow and blood. A wild combination.
Yet there was red pooling 'neath my standing feet, dark,
"I could not comprehend, to see through the blood river,
To truly find my way out of this crimson waste, wading,
Through the eddies and whirls contained within."
When the river turn read and the snow began to swallow us. Are we done? Thank you Lovecraft for sharing the excellent poetry. Made the reader think and ponder your words.
Coyote

[Lovecraft]

Thanks again, Trickster! This poem has two metaphorical meanings. ;P

[Coyote Poetry]

I enjoyed the poem and you are welcome.

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

Since red is physical and power(I associate with will)and white being perfection, my interpretation is need. Being pulled in a direction of movement downward or upward signifying growth.

[Lovecraft]

Very good interpretation, Queenie! Pretty damn close, but not quite there. :P
Although I like to leave it to the readers interpretation.

[Ken Simm.]

The dichtomies here first interested me. The contrast of blood on snow but also the fact that the protagonist wad difficulty perceiving the events. The layered differences between the natural and what is seen as calm and the horror of bloody disturbances. Excellent building of tension and dark wonder at that. Visceral and creeping.

[AYVID N]

Sharp images of rich red on white. The death of nature is beautifully twinned with the death of the self. Soon all outside and inside will be lifeless and swathed in a pristine, corpsy white. A very inspiring poem.

[Lovecraft]

Thanks, Divya.

[Papaya]

Blood on snow is quite a striking image.
I have to admit, I cannot figure it out other than it feels like maybe someone has been mortally wounded and it dying in the snow,

[Papaya]

* is dying... not 'it'

[Lovecraft]

You're pretty damn close in your interpretation! ;D

[Lovecraft]

There are two meanings being expressed simultaneously. ;)

[Papaya]

Ha! : )

[Lovecraft]

The other meaning is far more ephemeral ;P

[Papaya]

Ahhhh ok :)