Hidden Lies

A visual novel that follows a mute and a famous idol.

Plot:

Reira Ishikawa dreamed of being an idol when she was young however, she becomes a mute after destroying her vocal chords during an audition while Mikyu Haruna goes on to become a famous idol. However, she stresses over the work of an idol and tries to leave the world of being an idol and hide the dark past that she both loves and loathes.

Characters:

Reira Ishikawa is an 18 year old who wants nothing more then to be an idol however, because she is a mute that makes her dreams next to impossible.

Mikyu Haruna became a famous idol at the age of 12 but deep down finds it very stressful. She soon tries to leave the life of an idol behind.

I hope to finish this project soon but it could take awhile as coding it is very mind numbing.

Script Preview:

Here is a small preview of the script. Please note that the script is formatted for Ren'py (which is based off of the Python programming language) if you do not understand code then you can simply ignore it.

label start:

    $ demomode = True

    

    window hide

    scene black

    nvl clear

    

# nnnnnnnnnnn

    

    Rcent "Living life to its fullest is hard. It’s even harder when you have no reason to live at all. It’s impossible to live if your reason is pulled away from you. The lack of hope that it causes...it roots itself into you."

    window hide 

    scene bg street snow 

    with slowfade

    nvl clear

    window show

    R "When I was ten, I was determined to become an idol."

    R "I spent the morning of the audition with my friends. They wished me good luck, and my mom and I left for the studio."

    R "Of course, I was not the only little ten year old girl who wanted stardom. Plenty of girls who had the same dream. I mean who wouldn’t want to become an idol? The art that idols create with the blend of their voice and music was... magical. A single song could reach a person’s heart and change their lives." 

    R "It can help them in a time of need, and even inspire others to do good."

    R "Plus idols were just so cute!"

    R "However, these dreams were doomed to fail."

    window hide 

    scene bg studio

    with slowfade

    nvl clear

    window show

    R "My mom and I made our way into the studio."

    R "We were directed to a giant waiting room with plenty of young girls just like me that were hoping to impress the important people enough to be given a chance."

    R "My number to audition was 66 out of 230 girls. It was a relatively low number, but just sitting in the main area while 65 other girls go in was torture. By the time the 54th girl went in, I just wanted to sing my song and leave the building."

    R "When it was the 65th girl’s turn, I started humming and softly singing my piece. Mom was worried about my voice becoming worn, but I needed to warm up."

    R "I sang my song however, my throat started to feel weird."

    R "Perhaps I just needed some water."

    R "My mom grabbed a small paper cup and filled it with water from one of those water dispensers."

    nvl clear

    R "Once I finished the water I heard them call my number."

    R "I walked into the bright and terrifying room. Nothing about it looked out of the ordinary. Just three tables with six people siting behind it. Just six people who could make or break my dream."

    R "Thoughts and images of me being an idol swirled in my mind as I walked to the stage heading for the center of the room."

    R "The thing that took me out of my mind was the judge, a stern man, asking my name."

    R "He was dressed in a simple black tee-shirt, jeans and converse. He was well known for being extremely rude to people but the thing was the man knew talent when someone would sing."

    R "I opened my mouth and moved my lips to say my name."

    R "But my body froze when I don’t hear my voice. The judges gave me a puzzled look as I tried again to say my name."

    nvl clear

    R ""I’m Reira Ishikawa"."

    R "Nothing..."

    R ""I’m Reira Ishikawa!""

    R "The room was still quiet. So quiet that you could hear a pin drop."

    R "My body stiffened as I stop speaking. The only muscles that can move is my heart. I become more and more aware of my racing heartbeat and my short breaths than of the confused and concerned judges."

    R "I vaguely heard an echo of the stern judge’s voice, but I couldn’t make out what he said."

    R "The sound of my breathing also dimmed from my ears. Soon I could only hear bells. Screaming bells. The sounds made my dizzy. I could barely stand. I fell to my knees as my vision darkened. The ringing began to get louder and louder. Suddenly, everything went as black as a mid-night sky."

Reviews

[NanaThomas]

Definitely getting the anime/manga vibe here. :D It's an intriguing set up, and I know of a lot of people who would read/watch the s**t out of that.
My only critique here is instead of having your character describe the objective facts of what happened that day, have her describe what she experienced more. Her thoughts, feelings, things she noticed. I as a reader am less interested in what the man was wearing than what Reira was experiencing as she felt that weirdness in her throat. What was weird, exactly? Scratchy? Stiff? I don't know. I really wanna know. Was she scared of the man? Was it more than just his reputation? Or was it the converse he wore? How does his clothing relate to his rudeness? How does asking her name make him stern and rude? Perhaps start by writing a draft of what happened like you're telling it as a story, then convert that to a narrative form. Try to stay away from listing what happened. It's a story, not a grocery list. Do your interesting idea justice by making the narrative just as interesting!
All that being said, you went out with a bang! I liked reading Reira's reaction to the loss of her voice. I could feel it for sure. Put that level of feeling into the beginning and middle and hook me like a fish from the start!

[Indigomoon]

I love anime and this screams anime or a comic book, the programming was similar to pyton so it was easy for me to read since I use smapi to put mods in a game I own and they look similar and the story had me confused at first of why a mute would want to be an singer or idol then I continued reading and her character just floored me well done :)

[Wølfy]

Well, she was not a mute to begin with. She had a voice, but because of a throat infection that she did not take care of pretty much ruined her voice so now she cannot sing. And yeah, Ren'py is close to Python, was made in it. The cool thing is if you know Python you can use Python code with that $ symbol.

[Indigomoon]

nice well I like where it is going

[christina sherin]

nice story .I like the coding way of telling a story.Really impressive

[Sapientiam]

This sounds like a plot to an anime I would totally watch. And, it's a visual novel? I can't wait to read it. I've created mangas and comics before, but never have I ever created a visual novel. I may considser since it employs both artistic and written skills, and I typically think of my stories as animes or mangas. In all, this is an interesting project that I will try to check out. If only I wasn't so inactive XD.

Good luck on this story!

[Wølfy]

Haha thanks bro ^-^ and yeah, you could create a visual novel. It is actually easy to do in Ren'py and Ren'py is free.

[Relic]

It must be pretty tough wanting to be an idol and knowing you can't due to vocal strain. The mixed feelings involved are probably hard to deal with.

[Wølfy]

Yeah, not being able to live out your dream is a big thing.