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Roze confronts the king about what he has done, at night she goes up to the tower and meets Fenrir. She takes the vial of ash and Dragon blood to the Elvin king, and takes a vampire with her.

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                     I stood atop a hill gazing down at the bodies that were covered in blood. I looked up at the black dragon standing before me and looked back at the king.   
                    “What’s wrong Roze?” He asked as he put his hands together putting them to his lips. “Nothing, just…why would you go and use a thing of such perfect nature to kill people?” I looked towards the dragon.
                      “Because this is my land and I control it nobody else.” He hissed.
                       “You don’t have to kill people because of it, look what you have created!” I screamed as I squinted my eyes. He looked around as if he didn’t give a flying horses tail. “You have created a Hell. A Hell, that has reeked over a thousand innocent peoples lives. You have just killed them to show your dominance, and look what you have done. You’ve killed more than a thousand people.” My bright silver eyes started to water as I started to cry.
                          “Salem, burn there bodies.” I looked toward the guard standing beside me. “Yes ma’am.” He replied. I stormed into the castle as I looked back forcing my thoughts into the dragons mind.
                             ‘I will be at the top of the castle in two hours meet me there.’The dragons large red eyes gave me an assuring look. I walked into my room as my metal armor clanked together, I pulled out a vial filled with gold liquid from under my pillow I pulled my breast plate off and put it between my breast looking around as I placed another vial next to that one except this vial was filled with ashes. I put my breast plate back on and pulled my long fine blond hair out of the pony tail I had it in.
                               I looked in the mirror as I traced the scar that went from the corner of my right eye down to my hip.                      
                             “I’m coming home.” I whispered under my breath.
                                I closed my small slanted silver eyes visioning the golden city of Dra’n. Elves passing by each other curtsying, bowing, shaking hands, etc. There pale skin dancing across the scenery. I imagined the taste of the sweet Elvin fruits dancing across my tongue. Such wonderful thoughts of home, it was like a dream. I traced the curved designs that were put upon the red satin pillow in my arm.I looked out the window to see the sky dark as pale dots covered it.
                                “It is time.” I whispered as I slowly yet quietly glided out of the room to the ascending staircases. I scurried up the stairs to the top of the castle. I stayed silent as I passed behind guards, I looked across to see the door to the top of the castle. I wrapped my small hand around the red rusted handle as it creaked open I stepped out and looked up at the velvet sky pursing my lips together.I heard a low demonic screech and looked up at the sky seeing the red dragon land on the top of the castle next to me.
                                  “Do you have the vials?” It asked. “Yes, I do Fenrir.” I replied as he bent  his head down to my face nuzzling my pale skin. 
                                  “Thank you, Roze, we need some one to free us.” Fenrir whispered. “What do you mean us?” I tilted my head to the side with a questioning look. “Goliate, has more dragons hidden in the chamber. You will have to take the vials back to your home and come back and free us when you can.” He pulled his head back as he informed me.            
                                  “I didn’t  even know that, so that must have been the sounds I was hearing at night when I was trying to go to sleep.” I looked down touching my chin in deep thought.“Yes, the roar of pains, you’ve been hearing, that would be young Lillaian.” His large red eyes glanced down at my hands that were by my side.
                                 “Who is that?” I questioned. “That, is my mate, she was there and when I seen such a beautiful creature, I went head over tail for her.” He replied. I crouched beside Fenrir as I heard the door creak open, seeing a young girl about the age fourteen cautiously stepping from behind the door looking at Fenrir.
                                 “Hey Fenrir, Lillaian says that they didn’t do it tonight, but they are going to do it tomorrow, or the next day, but she’s hurt really bad, I had to put the salve on her side. She’s not doing so good, the elves need to hurry, for she doesn’t have long before she goes with Rozania.” The pale black haired girl whispered.“Thanks Xuivera, you are going to have to take some of this and give it to her, tell her they are trying to hurry. Here is something to repay you.” Fenrir held up one of his large black paws and took a talon dragging it across his chest letting the blood that trickled from the cut fall into a small jar.
                                 Xuivera’s eyes glistened brightly like stars in the night sky. ’Why do I have a feeling there is something extra ordinary about this girl?’ I pushed my thoughts into Fenrir‘s mind. He handed the jar and I watched curiously as the girl took it and pressed it to her small lips tipping the bottom towards the sky. My mouth fell open as I seen her gulp down the gold liquid, she lowered the jar and her eyes turned a bright purple.     
                               “Vampire,” I whispered under my breath.“Yes, I am a vampire. You must be an elf?” She was behind me in a matter of seconds with her hand to my throat and her mouth close to my neck.
                               “S-stop, I need to go to Dra’n, the golden city of Elves. I need to take the vials to King Crowalk.” I stuttered. “How do I know your just not a regular guard here?” She asked quietly. I pulled my hair behind my long pointed ears showing them to her. She nodded releasing her grip on my throat as I turned around looking at her and glancing back at Fenrir.
                             “Did you ever once see me eat any meat?” I asked. “No.” She replied.“Only fruit, am I correct?” I crossed my arms shifting my feet. “Yes,” She looked down.   
                          “Are you going to free the dragons?” She looked at me with hopeful eyes. “Yes, I am, I was sent here by King Crowalk, to retrieve two vials, a vial of blood and a vial of-” She interrupted me. “Ash?” I nodded tilting my head. “The visions they are coming true, you, are her!” Xuivera squeaked as she gripped my hand.
                         “Who am I?” I was confused and feeling left out of the information. “You are Rozania, the goddess.” Her eyes locked onto mine.    
                     “Wait, I’m not a goddess, I’m just an Elvin Guard.” I replied taking a step back. She looked down shaking her head, “They always deny it, your soul is pure and has rage of a dragons.” It looked as if she was looking through my chest into my heart.
                         “Goddess of Dragons.” She smiled. “Goddess of Dragons?” I questioned. “Yes, why do you think you can gain trust from them easily, a dragon can look into one’s soul, and see what it is.” She laid her hand on my shoulder smiling. “Your soul is hers, you just don’t know it yet.”I looked down as I felt her hands disappear off my shoulders and were back at her side.
                        “May I ask you one question?” She leaned against Fenrir. “You just did.” I noted towards her. “Can you take me with you?” She laughed quietly. “You must have your own horse.” I replied. “I can steal one.” She grinned.“Are you up for danger?” I glanced over to her.“I am a vampire.” She set her purple eyes on my neck.“Okay, then lets go.” I smiled looking up at Fenrir.
                         “I will be back to rescue you and the others.” I added before disappearing behind the door with Xuivera by my side. We raced down the stairs her disappearing into a shadow and I shifting into a black panther weaving in and out of the shadows. When we made it out of the castle I shifted back to my original form mounting my horse, Nacoma.
                        “Go steal your horse.” I grinned as I pointed to a horse that was hitched to a wooden pole. Xuivera walked like a feline, I watched carefully as I seen her near the horse. She placed her hand on the pole and gently pushed down, breaking it in half.The horse reared back whining, the sudden movement and cracks scared it. Xuivera calmed the horse whispering soothing words into his ear that I could barely here. I patted Nacoma’s side and she began to walk, I smiled down at Xuivera as she mounted the horse. “Impressive, for a vampire.” I yawned. “Well I’m just a newborn not quiet yet a senior vampire, if you know what I mean?” She replied.
                         “I can’t go out in the sunlight.” she added. “Or you will…get burned, right?” I asked as we rode side by side. She shook her head. “No I won’t get burned, I’ll just…turn to ash immediately without the smell of burning skin and smoke.” She replied looking down at the reins in her hands.
                        “How do you know that?” I questioned. “My father was attacked by a vampire and left for dead, but he was turned into one of the monsters and then, the next day, we didn’t see anything wrong with him other than he was paler and his eyes were purple, he never slept, at night.” She frowned.
                        “What happened?” I asked as I raised an eyebrow."One night, I guess he didn’t drink any blood since the attack, and well he took me as his prey, he bit into my neck and drained the life out of me, I started seizing as the venom went to my heart and stopped its beating, and I became what I am today, and a few weeks later he accidentally stepped into the sun and well turned to ash immediately.” She replied.
                        “Wow, that must have been rough, Xuivera” I looked down. “It wasn’t really, he was there until he sold me to the king as a slave, I would sneak out at night and one day I stayed over, and I pushed him into the sun and you get the picture.” She glanced over at me.   
                       “What about your life story?” She motioned towards me in question.
                      “Well, my mother left right after I was born but my father died a few weeks after I was born, so the king adopted me and I became his daughters companion. I was given a position to be a guard to protect the kings daughter, Jasmine Oak. Over the years I became a spy, he sent me here to get a vial of blood and ash, from the last dragon, but apparently, he isn’t the last dragon, and know here I am, going back home to help with the dragons.” I pulled back on the reins looking around.
                      “Well, how come you can change your form into a panther?” She asked. “All elves are given an alternative animal form. Meaning we can change into any animal the gods assign to us. The gods assigned the black panther to me.” I informed.
                        I jerked back on the reins in my hands as Nacoma came to a stop. I wrinkled my nose as I started to gag.
                       “Do you smell that?” I asked as I inhaled the Toxic air. “Yes, oh my god, what is that?” Xuivera pressed her hands over her nose wrinkling it.
                       “Troll Blood, they were killed here.” I inhaled some more of the air trying to make out some more scents. “I smell Elf blood, too.” I replied, my eyes grew wide as we neared a lake of blood.  My eyes swept across the bodies, I screamed as I seen a particular body, I leaped off Nacoma and sprinted to it weeping.
                         “What’s wrong Roze?” She asked. “Shadow Moonwalker, my lover, this is his body.” I cried as I moved my hands over his wounds. His blood had been drained from him. I hugged his body close to me breathing in the familiar scent weeping into his body. I wiped the tears from my eyes as I picked him up and put him over the back of Nacoma mounting her.
                        “Come on, we go home now.” I turned her a little bit and patted her side wiping tears from my eyes only for new ones to take there place. She started at a trot then began running I pressed my face close to her mane keeping the wind out of my face. Xuivera was behind me trying to keep her horse with the pace Nacoma was going. We dodged falling branches, and vines until we made it to an open field.
                       “Look down there.” I smiled  wiping the tears away from my face before I pointed in a direction and Nacoma started moving in that direction.
                      “Wow, Dra’n the Legendary Elvin city of gold.” Xuivera’s mouth fell open in awe. “Yes, such lucky elves, get to live in such a wonderful city.” I smiled. I slightly spurred Nacoma as she ran down the hill quickly coming to a stop. “Good Girl.” I smiled patting her neck turning to make sure the body was still behind me.
                     “The city is beautiful.” Xuivera’s eyes were in awe as she starred.
                     “We must hurry if we want to be there in time, before the sun rises.” I looked towards the East seeing the rays of the sun appear over the horizon.
                     “Xuivera, we must hurry.” I snapped the reins as Nacoma reared back I held the body close to myself as she started running. Xuivera was right behind me.
                      She snapped her reins and her horse came up beside me whining. “We are almost there.” I called to her over the wind. We loped through the city coming upon a large golden tower. We dismounted and ran inside I slammed the door behind Xuivera panting heavily as I looked out a window. “You will have to have a special room. I will show you to it, it is in the dungeon basically.” I walked quickly down a descending staircase dragging her behind me.
                     “Your room will be right here.” I dragged my finger along a line dragging up, across, down, and across again. A door appeared, Xuivera opened it and smiled back at me. “Thanks Rozania.” She smiled back to me.
                     “My names Roze Thorn.” I shook my head laughing. “You have her spirit though.” She grinned before turning back around and disappearing into the dark room.        
                     “Good morning.” I smiled as I dragged my finger along the outline of the door and it disappeared once again. I walked back up the stairs into the hallway smiling, happy to be home.
                         I walked into the throne room kneeling down with my forearm on my knee looking down. “King Crowalk I have returned after three-years among humans, with the vials you have asked for.”
                        “Stand my child, for you have done what has been asked of you. You are relived of today‘s duties.” The king stood as I took the vials from where I hid them. He held out his pale white hand as I placed the vials in his grip. I smiled as he hugged me expressing his joy of seeing me.
                        “I am so overjoyed that you have finally returned from the task I have given you. Jasmine will be extremely happy you have come home, Especially in time for her wedding.” He smiled.
                        "Jasmine’s getting married?” I asked smiling. “Yes, to the Prince of the Western kingdom.” Crowalk replied.
                        “He’s Elvin right?” I questioned. “Yes, he is. You don’t have to worry about it, I wouldn't let my daughter marry such a scoundrel.” The old elf scratched his long white beard.
                          “Roze? Roze!” Jasmine walked into the room and rushed over to me giving my a spine-crushing hug.
                          “Jasmine, to tight!” I squeaked.She dropped me immediately laying a hand on my shoulder.
                          “I’m so happy your home!” She squeezed my shoulders.
                          “I am to, but, I have a request.” I looked up at the King. “What is it Roze?” He asked. “Shadow Moonwalker’s body was recovered,” I looked down.
                        “Wasn’t he kidnapped by trolls?” Jasmine looked at her father in question. “Yes, he was.” He replied.“Well, I would like to have his funeral, tomorrow.” I looked up at him as I felt tears start to well up in my eyes. “Also, I have a friend that is sleeping in the dungeons secret room, she is a vampire, her name is Xuivera, but, she says I am Rozania a dragon goddess.” I added.
                        “She can see into people’s souls?” Crowalk questioned. “Yes she can, she looked into mine for the longest time, she says I have her spirit.” I held my hand up to my heart.“I would be surprised if you didn’t.” He replied. "Why do you say that?" I asked curiously. "Because, your mother, is Rozania, she has a twin sister, that is a death goddess, leaving you was the hardest thing she could have done. Her twin sister, Rozalina was trying to kill you so she had to leave you with me. She had already killed your father, and she was working on killing you, but your mom left me to tend to her and her own duties. She killed Rozalina, and hasn't been seen since." He informed me.
                         “So, I have part of my mothers spirit?” I asked. “Yes, you are her daughter, you have part of her spirit and part of your fathers. That’s were you get your protect side from.” He began walking to the ceremonial room I was following behind him with Jasmine by my side. “I didn’t know that I could have half my mom and my dad’s spirit.“ I starred at the floor in awe.
                          “Because, you haven’t been taught that yet.” He replied. “You’ve been taught everything else, but that.” he added. “We are going to have the ceremony tonight.” He grinned. I smiled as he held up the vials to the light as if checking to see if it was real. “Yes sir,” I smiled.
                            “I want you to wear a dress, to this one. The one that’s on your bed.” He smiled. I nodded turning around walking up the ascending stair case. I walked into my room and looked on my large cream colored bed seeing a red and gold long velvet dress. I took off my armor and put on the dress with help from Jasmine.
                           “We will first have supper, and then we will have the ceremony.” Jasmine grinned.I nodded in agreement, with the kings orders.
                           “Wow, you look stunning, like a red rose.” She smiled. I smiled shyly, to my child hood friend.
                            “Come on we don’t want to be late for the ceremony.” She ushered me out the door, down the stairs and into the ceremony room where everybody stood awaiting my arrival.
                              As I took my seat everybody bowed there heads as I did. I started to pray to the gods thanking them for my safe journey there, and back.I lifted my head and looked towards the old king smiling.
                           "Supper may start." He smiled as our food was brought to us. My favorite fruits were revealed and my mouth started watering. I started to eat and hold a short conversation between the elves that were sitting around the table. When we were finished the tables were taken away by the servants and we were taken to the fountain room.
                            "Are you ready my dear?" The king asked as I nodded smiling.

Author's Note

Ignore Grammar and Spelling problems, what did you think, and how can I make it better

Reviews

[RDOriginal]

You've obviously put a lot of effort into this piece to create such a volume of work. However, reading this I get the impression that it's a very raw draft. Leaving aside the grammar and spelling - which as always can be picked out with a good proof reading, there is an impression that you've written it without reviewing what's gone already. That's not a bad thing in general, it's important to get words onto paper whilst the creative juices flow. Unfortunately what can happen is that the action can be a little staccato, for instance your main character begins 'gliding' out of a room, then 'scurries' up stairs and it just seems a little inconsistent with itself.

You obviously have a lot of crative talent and are inspired but I'd advise you to slow down just a little.

[Steve]

Nice job! I was really involved in this one.........you are good ideas!

Good picture too to go with this one....

[KaySea]

amazing

[Daydreamer54]

if you didn’t you see-If you didn't see.
talking with all the elves at the table holding a short conversation with the elves. -U could just say talking to the elves at the table since we already know you're having a conversation with them. I agree with wat Sarah Mercury has to say. Also u r revealing too much information at one time about who Roze really is and u rushec with explaining who Roze's mother really is. Wouldn't Roze be sad if she found out her lover was dead? Also the whole chapter is a bit rushed and I do advise u to slow down. Other than that, it's great! i'd love to see wat happens next!
P.S- Another vampire? *groans*

[nono]

Love it. A lil long. so i'll finish the rest later. BUT don't get me wrong. I did really really like what i read. It was very good. Nice job. I'll have to finish it a little later.

[Sara Mercury]

Be sure to begin a new paragraph when another person speaks, or when the person who is presently speaking changes the subject...