The Fine Line

There is a fine line

Between love and hate

Between you and me

Between now and then

Between love and hate

There are times my anger fills up

Then my happiness brims the cup

Between you and me

We are as different as we are the same

you the boy and I the girl, by any other name

Between now and then

I loved you then i hated you, boy

now I'm the only girl, you bring so much joy.

Author's Note

Trimeric poetry, I'm starting to really like these ^_~

Reviews

[Ryan Zeller]

I really liked the third stanza. "Between you and me" gives a personal touch to the narrator, as if they are whispering that line in the reader's ear. I would suggest changing the second line to "We are as different as WE are the same." Sounds more natural, I think. The third line in that stanza is great too -- it recognizes the inherent cliches between a boy and girl, but accepts them.

Hope this helped!

[Serenity Faith]

Why thank you ^_^ that actually does flow quite a bit better that way.

[.]

I am starting to love the flow of it as well :) Great job.

[Serenity Faith]

Thank you very much ^_^

[Lost in Wonderland]

Very nice work and good use of the template:) I liked the idea u had and it worked very well with the structure you chose to do it in

[afra]

amazing ....good work

[Patient Poet (Yos)]

I love it , it flow beautifully :)

[Sam Gregory]

This is cool, it got me thinking about relationships and stuff. keep it up

[Olivia Marie]

Written beautifully. :) I loved how you broke it down :)
I don't know what a trimeric poem is but still It was awesome! :)

[Serenity Faith]

Thank you ^_^ and don't feel bad, I didn't quite know what a trimeric poem was myself until a few days ago....I'll try to explain this as best I can, so forgive me if it doesn't even make sense ^_~
The format of the poem is a,b,c,d, then b,1,2 c,1,2, d,1,2, (or something like that anyways) in which you take the second line add two more different lines, then the third line, and so on and so forth. (not taken from google or anything, just off the top of my head xD)

[Olivia Marie]

That's sooooooooo kewl :D

[Skye]

I can see why, you write them so well!

[....]

Very poetic and neatly written