It's a Secret

The Thing consumed my soul.

Permanently scarring, leaving a hole.

My mind is a creation new.

A cowering light, hidden from view.

I want, I need to scream.

To suffocate this unwelcome dream.

I’ve fallen from my safety net,

but I can’t tell anyone. It’s a secret.

 

The Beast haunts my disillusions.

Disrupting my horizon with its own protrusions.

Forget the Beast and bury the celebration.

I can’t even control the negotiation.

To be cradled in the arms of a Beast,

is a lingering, essential feast.

I need to feel wanted, and yet,

I can’t tell anyone. It’s a secret.

 

The Fight, it’s been lost.

Slain on the ground in which I’m tossed.

A strategic battle ending in defeat,

I’ve lived my life in the traveler seat.

Giving up was never in my design.

But this was always their battle, never mine.

They’ve held the strings and I regret,

but I can’t tell anyone. It’s a secret.

Author's Note

First poem I've liked in a while. Hopefully this is the start of something great...critiques welcome.

Reviews

[RedInk524]

Ah yes, another example of your everchanging mind. This piece is not dark intentionally, but naturally due to its personal flare. So much pain, so much despair shown in the lines... And even a sense of hoplessness..
The beast, you and i both know what that is. Personally, i call it The demon. And just like for most people with these unpleasant struggles, its a secret. And so the person is forced to hold it all within and battle the beast on thier own, its a secret. A dark, hopesucking, and malicious beast.
I love your dark turn, and i love this poem. Perhaps you should change your name to Raven, its a dark bird and you are no summer or spring bird anymore. :D

[Ness7752]

Good poem. The flow is really great. Life it's a secret.

To be cradled in the arms of a Beast,
is a lingering, essential feast.

I like this line here, it makes one think what life could be like.

...this is really amazing. Love the imagery and rhyme scheme.

[Fairytale]

I know the feeling of internal struggle. Interesting poem. Also, I enjoyed the word 'secret' at the end of each paragraph. This is a great touch.

[Melinda Weber]

the rhyme had a nice rhythm and flow :) good work

[Amila Jay]

Love the poem, amazing write:-)

[Coyote Poetry]

Those secrets can escape us. I like the description of struggle and the flow of desires and needs. Secrets keep us safe and lonely. Thank you for the excellent poem.
Coyote

[Matt "Mickey" Denney]

In this case, secrets DO make friends. I love the rhythm of this poem. It's awesome!

[light and ashes]

LOVE IT! Amazing from beginning to end.

[VelvetRosetta]

A nice piece you wrote here, enjoyed reading!

[Elaenor Aisling]

I can very much relate to this piece. A lovely write.