Mist

Mist

 

The mist out of the sun valley

Came along like there was no time

The mist as thick as walls

Making thinking impossible, no thoughts to ride

 

No one could call

Call out to souls in the sunny place

The mist to thick

To thick to erase ´

 

Erase the stubborn thoughts of not believe

That’s making impossible from within to see

See your soul

The good side of time

 

Time is timeless in sun valley lines

The books that were written were open to all

Now the books stay closed

Closed like the walls

 

The soul to sore to see the truth

The mist takes away the chance

The chance to be enlightend

Enlightend by the heavenly truth

Reviews

[I Cast a Shadow]

Very interesting. This work has a creeping effect. My biggest critique of this and most of your work has added up to grammar and flow. If you can post without grammatical errors your work will look far more refined. You might want to look into structure and challenge your self to reorganized words so one word might have more or less syllables. Play with vocabulary more and use metaphors and symbols to create a more interpretive glance at what you are trying to get across so that each time you want to express a notion you don't have to bluntly state it. I enjoyed this piece.

[Tasha]

Full of imagery, I loved it. Great job.
♥ Ta'Shandra

[Vinod Kumar U K]

Mountain mist... Nice job

[Daniel Thomas Andrew Da..]

Heavenly Truth, so hard to grasp
Divine Rainbow, for me will last
A gentle word, a gentle heart
With faith heavens truth will not depart
Daniel

I really liked your poem. It was ethereal and spiritual. So many yearn at times for deep truths for life moulding, but are too enshrouded in their own mists of life to perceive the rays of sunshine which heaven offers each brand new day.

A lovely poem. Good effort.

Daniel

[amdc101]

I love this poem.

The soul to sore to see the truth
The mist takes away the chance

How many people I know shrouded by the mist...

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

Full of imagery and love how deep it is!!!

[An owl on the moon]

What a vast journey through the misted lands.. landscapes and mindscapes brought to light in life and truth. Beautifully enriching.

[deeps]

loved the 3rd stanza, This is amazing.
Love this write, it's deep & powerful.

[-]

Wow, very nice. The beautiful vocabulary suits the abstract scenery and the way you bring certain thing to words.

I really like your style of writing!

[Coyote Poetry]

"The soul to sore to see the truth "
So many strong statements stood out in the poem. Life is a lesson. For the lucky people who live long enough. They realize we choose our journey. Good and bad. Can't blame no-one.
'The change to be enlightend
Enlightend by the heavenly truth "
To understand your life. Is when you know what is real. Thank you for a excellent poem.
Coyote