It Kills Me.

This is another sappy love poem or whatever you want to call it now leave it at that and if you think it is well I'm sorry it's not yours it's mine.

It kills me to see you happy with him but it's life and life happens not that I want it to but it does and always will your the 1st I truly loved and you break/hurt not just the love but the trust, your good name, and my memories. It kills me when I see his face and yours together or that pic of you two holding hands in the road walking away from the camera and the one where your your in his arms. It kills me I have to put up defenses just to see who has the will and want to to break them and get close and get to know the really me the me that is kind to all even you my lovely by that kills me just by the sight of your great and wonderfully beautiful face of yours.  It mainly kills me that you can use me for some "stuff" that we did and then dump me and never talk to me again but once and I think if we do talk that might just just help me get over you which I'm sad to say I really (excuse my langue but) f*****g need. I don't want to love you for who you are anymore or longer. I just want to feel free when I see you and I know you'll never see this or the tears and nights of waking up out of breath gasping for air because I had that same dream again but oh well at least this can be seen by someone that might care more then you ever did or will. Till the end of time let you be happy <3 forever and always.