Allie Chapter 39

Allie(Chapter 39) Forward

Chapter 39

 

            Wildflower was nervous when she woke up in the morning. Today was the day that would basically decide her future. So she spent a lot of time trying to find the perfect outfit. When she use to volunteer she went for a conservative look. But she’d been pregnant then and now she still didn’t eat much. Her clothes didn’t fit anymore and she never went anywhere. After a few outfits she put on a long skirt and a tank top with a sweater. It felt good to have a reason to get dressed and out of bed and the house. For the first time in a long time there was a little a glimmer of hope on the horizon.

            No matter what happened today she was going to reclaim her life. There would be no sulking or hiding. Even if the adoption wasn’t going to happen she would figure something else out. Nicolas was right it couldn’t be completely hopeless, they would have children. If anybody could find a way around anything it was her husband. She would never stop loving her son or forget but she needed to move on. Later she was going to need to do a little shopping. Maybe she could take the girls after school, they would like that. Pixie and Rory chased each other around; Brooke was puppy-sitting today.

            Tara was working today, of course she was. And she was happy to set everything up for them. Maybe she was right about everything. The girls were waiting for them alone in an empty class room. She felt a little nervous but she was mostly happy to see them. When she peeked into the class room she saw that they were drawing. From what she heard their mother had been an artist. And she heard that Tabitha had been the one to call 911 and hide her little sister. They had been through so much and still they were so loving and sweet.

            “I guess our talk really was good, huh?” Tara said with a knowing smile.

            “You could at least hide your smug grin,” Wildflower said and Tara laughed.

            “I gotta take this call,” Nicolas said holding up his cell phone. “I’ll be there in a second.” He kissed her cheek and walked away on the phone.  

            “Now or never I guess,” she said and took a deep breath.

            “How can you be worried? They adore you,” Tara said then opened the door. “Girls, you have a visitor. Both girls turned, got up and ran to Wildflower.

            “You came back,” Tabitha said excitedly.

            “Of course and I missed you both,” Wildflower replied. In that moment she was 100% certain that she would do anything to have these girls.

            “Mrs. Tara told us your baby went to Heaven like our mommy,” Tabitha said.

            “Yes, he did,” she nodded trying not to tear up. Usually she was ok until somebody mentioned the baby.

            “Come play with us,” Amber said pulling her hand.

            They sat down with Amber in her lap while both girls filled her in on things she missed. She had missed them even if she tried hard not to because they weren’t hers. Maybe they could be, why not? If they needed parents then her and Nicolas could be those parents. She would love them just like they were her own, like she loved Allie and Sammie and her brothers. Little girl clothes were so cute, she noticed. Amber had on an adorable little blue dress. Tabitha had little jeans on with flowers on them. They both had their curly light brown hair in a ponytail and they had blue eyes. She hadn’t thought about it before but they were the same shade as Nicolas’. Was that a sign or what? Curly hair like her and blue eyes like Nicolas, this meant to be.

            Sitting here with them she felt happier than she had in a long time. Children always made her happy, that was why being told she couldn’t have any destroyed her. Maybe at first she mostly wanted to have children mostly for her husband. But once she was pregnant everything about that changed. Some day she would get to have her own baby. But hadn’t she learned working here that a lot of kids were out there in need of love and a family? She could be like celebrities and adopt kids from all over the world. Adoption for some reason just hadn’t crossed her mind. When she looked up she saw that Nicolas and Tara were watching them. She gestured for her husband to come in and he did. Now for the moment of truth, she loved them but he had to.

            “Tabby, Amber, I want you to meet my husband, Nick,” she said to them. Tabitha looked up at him and waved and Amber got up and hugged his leg.

            “Nice to meet you,” he said and picked her up. This was a good sign.

            “Hey, it’s about lunch time why don’t the four of you go out?” Tara suggested, she obviously had planned this out well.

            “Can we?” Tabitha asked looking excited.

            “We can go anywhere you want,” Nicolas told me.

            This would be good, she could already tell. Tara was an amazing friend for doing all this and she knew them a little too well. Later she would find a great way to thank her. There was no way to really thank her enough; this was exactly what she needed. When she’d been drowning in sorrow she’d been thrown a lifeline in the form of two small girls. They would be her focus and her purpose and she would give herself fully to being their mother. One good thing about being married to Nicolas Capriani was that he always got exactly what he wanted. If she wanted this then he would give it to her. He would give Tabitha and Amber love like they deserved and needed. Whatever it took these would be her girls.

 

 

            Ricky dragged himself home the next afternoon a little hung over. During a lovely breakfast with his sister-in-law she informed him of her late night escapades with Brooke. He should have cared but didn’t there was nothing to be done about that. The rest of his family was going to react worse it was inevitable. Just like they would all find out now since Christina told big-mouthed Brooke. He wasn’t looking forward to going home; it was the last place he wanted to go. Sydney had left him at least a thousand voicemails crying. He had no idea what to say to her or what to do. Before he’d been all set to marry her because it was the right thing. Now he wasn’t sure what was right and what was wrong. Somehow they would work this out, but neither was fully going to be happy.

            Everything Isaiah and Christina said was true. A lot had changed, mostly because of Sydney so he could just marry her. Maybe he completely changed around the time Angel came back. His nature didn’t allow for being unfaithful but he couldn’t stop himself from being with her. It was all he could think about since they got on the plane. Then he followed her out to the orchard and kissed her because he had to. It was a compulsion and part of him had just wanted to stay with her. And it didn’t feel like cheating but what did he know? He never had relationships just random encounters with men and there were only a handful of those over the years.

            Maybe it was years of seeing the rest of the world find love and companionship that made his thing with Sydney ok. Ricky did love her and if it wasn’t for this would have had a family with her. There was still a small part of him that wanted to stick it out. Because he loved her and because he felt it was right to stay with her. At this exact moment he wasn’t sure how he felt about anything. He just needed a little time to sort it out. When he got to the apartment he saw that indeed Sydney had a listening problem. Her sisters were there in his living room glaring at him.

            All he asked of her was not to do anything stupid. So what did she do? Something stupid, it was the second dumbest thing she could do. Why would she go crying to her sisters? Next her parents would be over to yell at him like it was his fault. He never had to intention to tell her family that she did this to herself. Though from their expressions she left that part out, that was Sydney. He already had a headache; all he wanted was to sleep.

            “What is wrong with you?” Mary asked him.

            “I’m not in the mood for this, just leave,” Ricky said.

            “Our sister has been up all night crying because of you, again,” Bell said.

            “Like I said I’m not n the mood,” he said. That was when Sydney came in from in the back somewhere.

            “You came home,” Sydney said looking a little hopeful.

            “One thing I ask of you just one and you couldn’t do that?” He asked her and she start crying again, that was getting annoying.

            “I didn’t know if you were going to come home and Brooke and Christina came here,” she cried.

            “Why are you getting mad at her? She is carrying your child, why are you mad at her?” Mary asked him furiously.

            “I’m warning you don’t start with me,” he said.

            “You need to take responsibility for your actions,” Mary went on. Apparently not being able to take a hint ran in the family.

            “Sydney, tell your sisters to leave,” he said. If he could avoid another argument he would but it wasn’t very likely.

            “M-Mary and Bella can you please leave? I’m ok now,” Sydney said. Of course with her crying like that they weren’t going to leave.

            “No Sydney, we aren’t going to leave you. He can’t treat you like this,” Bell said. “Why don’t you come with us?”

            “Yes, Sydney if we’re leaving you are leaving with us,” Mary said.

            “Its ok, I’m fine,” Sydney assured them pitifully.

            “I thought you were a good Ricky, but how can you treat her like this? You got her pregnant and then you flip out at her about it? What kind of man does that? And after she forgave you for cheating on her? You need to take responsibility for child,” Mary tried to stare him down, it sort of amused him.

            “Don’t you dare talk to me about responsibility because you have no idea what you are talking about. And what happens between us is none of your damn business,” he said trying to hold in anger. He was kind enough to spare Sydney the embarrassment, at least with her family.

            “Please Mary, just let it go,” Sydney pleaded.

            “No, why are you letting him treat you like this Sydney?” Mary asked.

            “Just leave with us Sydney,” Bell urged.

            “As wonderful as that would be she’s staying here. We have a lot to talk about,” Ricky said looking at Sydney.

            “Where did you even spend the night? Was it with another woman?” Mary asked because she just couldn’t let it go. Though if it was one of his siblings he would fight for them too. Logically he understood but he was exhausted.

            “You really have no idea how ridiculous it for you to ask me that. Not that it’s your business but know nothing about me,” he replied. Apparently there was one thing that Sydney didn’t tell.

            “Once a cheater always a cheater,” Mary said.

            “Stop Mary,” Sydney said.

            “Sydney let’s go,” Mary ordered.

            “I’m not leaving, Ricky and I need to talk,” Sydney said. Finally she’d stopped crying and she was staring at him.

            “Really? What could you possibly have to talk about? Didn’t he make it clear that he doesn’t care about you when he left?” Bell asked.

            “Sydney just tell them why I left because I’m sick of this. So you know I never had any intention of saying anything, but they are on my last nerve,” he said.

            “Tell us what? You said he left after you told him you were pregnant,” Mary said. “Unless… it is his baby, right? I mean I just assumed since you are together and you kept crying over him.” Both sisters looked horrified and he felt like laughing, it was all so theatrical but he managed to hold it in.

            “I wasn’t with anybody else,” Sydney said then turned to him. “You know that right? Since I met you it’s always just been you and I made a mistake but I love you.” She crossed the room then coming to him with her sudden backbone. “Ricky, I couldn’t lose you, not to anyone. What could I do if you didn’t want me anymore?” When she said that she didn’t mean Angel or another woman, she meant men too.

            “What is going on?” Mary demanded.

            “Fine,” Sydney said taking a deep breath. “Ricky is mad at me not because it isn’t his baby but because I tricked him into getting me pregnant.”

            “On my God,” Bell said staring at her sister.

            “Are you serious?” Mary asked looking appalled.

            “Yes, I’ve become one of those girls that does stupid thing to keep a man. It’s not Ricky’s fault, at all, he was really great to me and I wanted too much too soon,” Sydney told them. At least she was finally taking responsibility for her own selfishness and stupidity.

            “How could you do that?” Bell asked, funny they still weren’t leaving.

            “I love Ricky and I wanted to be his wife and I was a little desperate. I’m obviously not proud of what I did but I can own up to it,” she said. “This wasn’t because of anything he did or didn’t do, it was me. I was selfish and impatient and couldn’t just let things happen naturally.” In that moment though he was still pissed he was proud of her.

            “Ladies while this has been really aggravating please leave,” Ricky told them.

            “Please,” Sydney said.

            Finally her sisters agreed to leave; they were too shocked to fight anymore. Once they were gone he went in search of some Tylenol for his headache that was 10 times worse than it had been. Instead of taking it with water he took it with tequila. That was probably a bad idea but right now he didn’t much care. He just didn’t want to think or feel anything. Sydney was so lucky he didn’t just tell her to leave too. Part of him wanted to but he wasn’t sure what she would do if he did. If she was the type of girl that could do this than he didn’t what she was capable of. This wasn’t the ideal situation but he didn’t want her to get an abortion or anything. Mostly because if she did that he really would kill her.

            This whole situation was just a painful reminder of how females could be. After this he was never going to have a relationship with anyone, male or female. Being alone watching the rest of the world be happy was so much better than this. His brother was right that marrying her would just be condemning himself to misery. Though he’d pretty much always resigned himself to a miserable life, he couldn’t marry her. If he married her that was permanent and there was no looking back. That wasn’t something he could give her now and maybe never. Later he could figure out the future and what he would tell the rest of his family. For now he wanted to sleep.

            “Are you going to leave again?” Sydney asked him, suddenly was bolder now than he’d ever seen, it was intriguing.

            “I don’t know, are you going to make me want to choke you?” He asked and that sufficiently unnerved her. 

            “You would never hurt me like that,” she replied.

            “Don’t be so certain about that. The only reason you’re still here is because I don’t trust you. If I’m not watching you who knows what you might do,” he told her. “I’m going to lie down, do you want to come?”

            “Ok,” she said and followed him to the bedroom. Purely out of habit he held her while he drifted out of sleep. It had to be just a habit because he couldn’t afford for it to be more than that.

 

 

            After spending half the day with his wife and Tabitha and Amber, Nicolas made a decision. They had just brought the girls back and Wildflower was saying goodbye to the girls. He requested that Tara set him up with a meeting with the Woman in charge. Of course Tara was happy to do that. This wasn’t exactly what he expected and it hadn’t been in his plans but he would roll with it. Meeting the girls and seeing the affect they had on his wife put it all into perspective. He now knew that he couldn’t Control everything in the world line he once thought. Some things were controlled by fate, a Concept he wouldn’t have believed in if it weren’t for the last year.

            “Mr. Capriani? An older woman asked and be nodded. “I am Ashley Price, I run this facility.”

            “Nice to meet you,” he said.

            “Were you and you wife interested in adoption?” She asked with a hopeful note in her Voice and a big smile.

            “Yes,” he said and she looked pleased.

            “We could get the process started and-”

            “Look I’m sure it’s a lot of work and it takes time. But I want those girls in my house by the end of next week,” he told her. “I don’t care what it takes or how much it costs, but I want it done now.”

            “Mr. Capriani, it’s not about the money,” she said.

            “I’m sure this place could use a sizable donation. Or maybe you yourself need a personal donation yourself. I could do both or just one of the two, it doesn’t really matter, you can choose,” he paused. “How about if the girls make a donation? They would naturally be grateful after they’ve been given care here so they could each make a $500,000 donation. Think about it, I’m sure it could help.”

            “You just met them today, how can you know that you want them that much?” She asked staring at him like he was insane.

            “My wife loves them and I trust her judgment completely. Besides they are very easy to love, you won’t have to worry about them. They will get all the love they deserve,” he said.

            “I’ll see what I can do,” she said. Pretty much he knew she would do whatever he wanted, money got things done.

            “Here’s my lawyer’s card, call him and negotiate with him. The sooner I can have them in my house, the better,” he said and she nodded.

            All he wanted was for his wife to be happy and he’d never thought this was the way to get that. She’d mentioned the girls before whenever he asked about her volunteering but he never thought anything of it. Seeing her with him and the way she smiled and lit up told him everything. This was a solution to several problems, they got to have children, the girls got parents and he didn’t have to worry about Wildflower as much. What she needed was a purpose in her life to get going again, he wasn’t that purpose. And he’d been at a loss for how to get her going again. The girls were two people that needed her and needed her love and that was a good thing.

            Watching her with the girls he knew this was the right thing. He didn’t know anyone that could love more completely than his wife. These girls would have the best of everything and all the love in the world. The three of them were sitting together talking and laughing. He sent a quick text to Gloria telling her what he needed done of course she was happy to assist and get things moving. He went back in so that he could say goodbye to the girls. They did seem to be just meant to be a family.

           

            “I’m a little afraid of what everybody will say, it’s coming out of nowhere,” Wildflower said they were on their way back home. Spending the day with the girls had been completely amazing and life changing.

            “You were meant to be a mother and everybody knows that,” Nicolas replied.

            “Yeah but we never talked about adopting, are you sure it’s what you want?” She asked watching him.

            “I think it’s the best course for us tight now. That doesn’t mean that we can’t still have children of our own. I still want that but we are giving two girls a home and a family and love. That’s a very good thing; we wanted at least six, right? Two down and four to go,” he said and she laughed.

            “Thank you, you’re believing in me when I have been a huge mess,” she said.

            “Losing a Child isn’t an easy thing, especially the way it happened. So what you had a hard time? It would be weird if you didn’t,” he said. There was a flicker of a murderous look in his eyes, of come there was.

            “You’re stronger than I am,” she whispered.

            “Not really, I just put it aside to be there for you and Allie. Though I am proud of myself for mot becoming a raging alcoholic,” he said.

            “Do you really think they will let us adopt? We are a little screwy and I’m like crazy. Who would really trust us?”

            “You my love worry way too much; there is nothing to worry about.”

            “But do you really think I’m stable enough to be somebody’s mother?”

            “Yes, stop worrying you will be amazing. These girls will want for nothing and have loving parents, they will never be separated and they will have a huge family. Those are all good things and that’s what you’re giving.”

            “I hope they can come home to us soon,” she sighed. He was right she didn’t need to argue, this was good.

            “Oh it might cost me a little but they will be home soon,” he said dismissively.

            “You bribed her?”

            “Of course not, I’m just makes a charitable donation to thank them for this amazing gift.”

            “Nick, you can’t bribe everybody.”

            "It wasn't a bribe and so you know everybody has a price. This is just a token of appreciation. Besides this generous donations will be made in the names of our beautiful new daughters. It’s never too early to teach them about charity and giving.”

            “Talk around it all you want and make justifications but I know it’s a bribe. But I will not complain if it gets our girls here quicker. We have all waited too long,” she said and he laughed.

            “Only my beautiful wife can see through me every time,” he said.

            “That’s why I’m your wife because you couldn’t possibly have me out in the world unattended plotting your downfall,” she joked.

            “You know me so well,” he replied.

            “I’m going to do my best to be a good mother to our daughters,” she said.

            “I know, I wouldn’t expect anything less from you. Now we just have to tell the brats we already have that we’re adding to our family,” he said.

            “Do you think Allie will feel bad about it? Like we’re replacing her?”

            “No, she gets to be a big sister it’s what she’s always wanted.”

            “Maybe I’ll call to see if I can take the girls out so we can buy bedroom stuff this weekend,” she said thoughtfully.

            “Oh yes two more ways for me to go broke some day,” he said and she laughed.

            “That is like literally impossible, I’d even know how much money you have.”

            “We, what’s mine is yours and ok there’s a lot. Before you I didn’t spend much money on anything. Occasionally Allie and Sammie and a bet here or there but I didn’t really need anything. Before you say anything I love to spoil you and the kids and I will enjoy spoiling the girls too,” he told her.

            “Of course Daddy and I’m sure you’ll be overprotective and never let them near any boys.”

            “You know it baby.”

            “This feels right,” she said and he took her hand.

            “Yes it does,” he replied.

            In her head she started listing the things she needed to do. At the top of the list was figure out a way to tell her family. Would they really agree that this was a good idea? Part of her wondered if maybe it was too soon and she should wait. But technically she’d been waiting to have these particular girls for months. She'd pretty much known the Moment she first saw them that they were meant to be here, it just sucked that it took a tragedy for it to happen. Having a purpose again was good for her. She wasn’t saving them they were definitely saving her. Hopefully her family would see that too instead of worrying that she wasn’t ready to be a mother. All she could really do was be the best mother she could be. There was no question in her mind about if they would get the girls, nobody said “no” to Nicolas. He wanted the girls so they would have them.

            When they got to the house Nicolas went up to his office to make some Calls. So Wildflower rent to find Brooke ad the puppies what she found was that Christina was over now too. This was good she could talk to them about the girls first. Before she could get to them Pixie and Rory were chasing each other around her feet. The girls would definitely love having puppies and it was perfect two girls and two puppies. Fate had already been at work when Nicolas decided to buy her the puppies. Another thing she noticed was that her best friends were talking about something they didn’t want bee to know about. She knew them too well for secrets. Later, first she had to talk to them about her girls. Getting out of the house and not telling Brooke where they were going nearly impossible.

            “Where have you been? “Brooke asked her.

            “Out,” Wildflower replied picking up her puppies.

            “Where you and Nicky out having a romantic outing?” Christina asked, they followed her out to the patio to sit.

            “No, we never do any romance anymore,” she said. Saying that and realizing it was a little sad. It was something to deal with later.

            “Start talking,” Brooke said.

            “Nick and I have decided to expand our little family,” she said.

            “That nice, so you went to see a fertility doctor?” Christina asked.

            “Oh God no I’m not ready for that disappointment,” she sighed. “We have decided to adopt.”

            “Really? That’s why Tara came over yesterday?” Brooke asked, they at least look happy for her.

            “Yes, we are soon going to be the parents of two amazing little girls,” she told them.

            “Oh those girls you were always with… Amber and Tabitha?” Brooke asked.

            “Yes, Nick met them today and fell in love with them so yeah,” she said.

            “That’s good; I haven’t seen you so happy in a long time. So how long will the whole process take? Does Mr. Capriani have a way to get around waiting?” Christina asked and she nodded.

            “Yes, sometimes his impatience comes in handy. He told them that he wants the girls home by the end o next week. So I have to get them a bedroom ready. I was thinking trying to take them out tomorrow or Saturday to pick whatever they want,” she explained.

            “Count me in, Monster can meet her new cousins,” Christina said. “I really am happy for you, if anybody was meant to be a mother it was you.”

            “Thanks,” she said and they hugged.

            “You know I’m up for shopping,” Brooke said then she hugged her too.

            “So I don’t know how I’m going to tell everybody else about this. Do you think it’s too soon?

            “What is too ‘soon’? Nobody can put a time on when to grieve or when to start moving on. If you are ready to become a mother I think you better than anyone else would know,” Christina told her.

            “You defiantly were born to be a mother, and I always knew you would adopt those girls. From the moment you all laid eyes on each other it was over,” Brooke said.

            “Yeah and they love Nick, like all little girls do,” she said smiling. “So what is it the two of you aren’t telling me?” They looked at each other then back to her.

            “Sydney is pregnant,” Christina answered. Then they told her everything that happened yesterday and last night.

 

            After talking to Christina and Brooke, Wildflower grabbed her keys and left. She would have liked to say that she was shocked that Sydney would do that, but it would be a lie. Every time she ever needed someone Ricky was there for her. Naturally there was no place else in the world she would be. Even though she had a key to the apartment she knocked. Ricky answered the door and didn’t say anything, just let her in. It was a good thing he answered because she didn’t know what to say to Sydney. And it appeared she’d already got yelled at already.

            “Which one told and who else knows?” Ricky asked her.

            “Brooke and Chris and they didn’t tell anybody else,” she answered. “I was going to call you to tell you that Nick and I are adopting two girls. But it appears you have enough issues with children.”

            “What did you wake up today and decide you wanted a kid so he went to find you one?” He asked and she glared at him.

            “No, I spent a lot of time with them when I volunteered and Tara came over yesterday to guilt me a little. Anyway enough about me, how are you doing big brother?” She asked and he shrugged, she sat next to him and took his hand.

            “I think I’m still a little in shock, like if I sleep long enough it will go away. It’s ironic that you want kids desperately and I don’t know how to feel about this. I mean it’s my kid I have to love it, but everything else is a mess,” he sighed. He laid down with his head on her lap and looked up at her. “When she first told me I said I would marry her. That would be the right thing but I don’t think I can. It would make Marguerite happy, Sydney and her parents too, but not me. Isaiah said that maybe I should focus on my own happiness for once. The fact that I got advice from him just sounds crazy.”

            “You should focus on your own happiness and if she doesn’t make you happy don’t do it. Who can tell you what’s right and what’s wrong? The world isn’t so black and white there’s a lot of grey and a rainbow of colors,” she said. “Where is she anyway?”

            “Asleep, her sisters were here all night and when I came home. They made a big thing about everything and she told them the truth,” he shrugged. “You’re really going to adopt some kids?”

            “Yeah, like really soon, in the next week soon. Nick is impatient and wants to bring our girls home. I really wanted to adopt them from the moment I met them but I made excuses. The baby was the number one excuse and now I have none and no children. Allie is ours but she’s grown up and doesn’t really need me. Today is the first full day I’ve been out and behaving like a normal person,” she sighed.

            “You’ll do fine and you should be a mother. That is clearly what you want even if you didn’t always know it.”

            “Yeah, you know Ricky no matter what you decide it’s your life. And your family loves you and will always be here.”

            “So I’m guessing we have to gather and tell everybody we’re both becoming parents, huh?” He asked and there was definitely a hint of bitterness in his voice.

            “Yup, tomorrow we can worry about all that. Right now I’m here for you, anything you need I’m on it. You are always taking care of everybody else; I’m going to take care of you now. Don’t you dare try to fight me either,” she said.

            “Of course not,” he replied.

Sometimes just sitting in silence helped, she’d learned that much recently. So they sat in silence for awhile, sometimes there weren’t words to go with emotions. Tomorrow they could find words for the rest of the family today was about letting it all sink in. Their family was getting three new additions, the last time that happened triplets were born. Part of her hated that Sydney could trick her brother into getting her pregnant and she couldn’t at all. But there was no room for bitterness; she was going to have two beautiful sweet and loving daughters soon. Ricky would love his child and she already loved her girls, love was what life was about.

 

 

Nicolas looked up when his wife came in; she’d been gone for awhile. Brooke said she’d gone to see Ricky but nothing else. What he assumed was that she went to talk to him about the adoption but why would she leave like that? He tried not to be concerned about it but she’d left her cell phone. Since it was her idea to adopt she would tell him if she changed her mind, right? These days he didn’t know, some days she was a total stranger. It seemed like she was at least getting a little better. Or her acting skills were improving. She was home now and she came into their room and kissed him.

“Sorry I just ran out, I needed to see Ricky,” she said. She climbed on top of him and buried her face against his neck.

“Something wrong?” He asked wrapping his arms around her.

“No, Sydney is pregnant, that’s why I went to see Ricky,” she paused and sat her head up. “It’s actually ironic now that I think about it; she did to him what Sadie did to you.”

“Really?” He asked and she nodded. “Does it make you feel bad because we can’t have children right now?”

“A little, how come she can have a child by deception and I can’t? We want a baby and we can’t have one but people like her can? It’s not fair,” she said. And it was pretty obvious she was trying not to cry.

“It isn’t fair; nothing is ever fair in life. But we will have children; not just our girls but we will have them together. I’m going to find a way, when have I ever took no for an answer? You know that,” he said.

“Yes, but what if it doesn’t happen? What will you do then? I’ve kind of resigned myself to it never happening, but not you. For you to be the optimist is funny, I just don’t think you’ve looked at reality. There’s a good chance that the only way we can have children together would be with a surrogate. After knowing what it’s like and how it feels I couldn’t handle that. So what are we going to do if you can’t make magic happen?” She asked him, still she amazingly didn’t cry even though it was obvious she wanted to.

“There is no optimism, I will find away,” he assured her. “I love you and we will have many children together. You will be the one to carry my children; I do not accept anything else.”

“Have I ever told you that you are stubborn?” She asked and he shrugged. “I was talking to Ricky about having a little family meeting tomorrow. So that we can tell everybody about the girls and the baby.”

“I probably won’t be here; I have a lot to do tomorrow and some meetings. Will you be ok if I’m not here?”

“Yeah, it’s just my brothers; I’ll talk to Marguerite later. Would you like to call and tell Carmen or should I?”

“You’re forcing me to talk to my sister? I guess I have to tell my parents too, huh? I’m willing to bet that Rosa will have a heart attack, she thinks adoption is for poor people,” he sighed. “But I talked to my favorite cousin Luis and we will have our girls. Didn’t I tell you everybody has a price?”

“What exactly was the price here? Like a couple thousand? Oh and your mother is crazy,” she said.

“Yes she is and it’s kind of a lot, but it’s not from me. The donations will be from our daughters, one from each. It’s just $500,000 each,” he shrugged.

“Are you serious? That is a lot of money,” she said staring at him in shock.

“Aren’t they worth it? Everything will just be fast tracked, next week we will have a home study and they will want to meet everybody since your family practically lives here. Any documentation they need Gloria is already working on it. Which room did you want to give them?” He asked and she was silent a moment.

“Not the nursery,” she whispered and he nodded. “We can work on a room or rooms this weekend.”

“The room across from ours would probably be the best that way they are close to us. Once upon a time it was the baby room. My grandparents didn’t believe in nannies so they kept their kids there until they were one or two. Then the kids were shipped down the hall and they used family instead of hired help. That was the way it was done around here for awhile before them. But as you can imagine the room hasn’t been used in a very very long time. I’d thought the other room made a better nursery because I could get the doors put in,” he explained.

“I’m not really ready to give it up yet,” she said.

“There’s no reason to, we will have a baby for the nursery,” he said.

“Um so something that’s off topic, but it was brought to my attention that we have no romance. Things use to be so different between us,” she said surprising him.

“That is true, I’m sorry,” he said. He hadn’t really been thinking about that type of thing lately.

“No, I don’t want you to be sorry; it’s kind of my fault. I want things with us to go back to the way they were before. When we acted like we were married.”

“I just didn’t know what you could handle without pretending.”

“Before we become parents maybe we should do something together.”

“Good idea let me arrange something.”

The last few months not being able to touch his wife had been difficult. His process for dealing with that had been to put it out of his mind. Especially after what happened before and then followed by the thing with Eric. Lately he worked out to shave off some tension and pent up rage, among other things. Though there really wasn’t enough of anything to completely get his mind off of sex. Things were starting to change; there was less strain in their marriage. He kissed her hoping to slowly ease back into some kind of sexual connection. The last time they had sex wasn’t as bad as the time before that but it was hard. Feeling like he forced her in to it didn’t make him want to do it again. Everything needed a little work and he was never afraid of working. There was a lot of work to be done.

 

Allie wasn’t sure what to think of this family meeting. But everybody was there, usually it was just dinner. These days everybody came over for dinner and Jay usually cooked. The only person missing was Uncle Nick, which she hoped didn’t mean anything bad. Something was going on; she suspected it yesterday when she came home from school. Her aunt/mom wasn’t there and came back late from wherever she was. What did that mean? Now she was in the sitting room sitting between Ricky and Ivan but also kind of laying on them too. Brooke, Christina and all the brothers were there, even Dom. He’d recently come home from school. She sat with Sammie in one of the big chairs. Lately she was beyond paranoid.

“Ok so we are having a family meeting to discuss some new members being added,” Brooke said. “And sorry not that sure the hell does not mean I’m pregnant.”

“Nick and I have decided to adopt,” Wildflower said. “By that I mean that by the end of next week we should have two more daughters.”

“Since when were you planning on adopting?” Van asked her.

“Since yesterday,” Ivan answered.

“Technically that is true but I’ve known the girls for awhile,” she said.

“The ones from when you volunteered?” Allie asked and she nodded.

Everybody else asked questions and they conversed, while Allie thought back. She remembered those little girls from the orphanage. This was a good thing; she’d always wanted siblings Markus no longer counted. Two little sisters would be amazing and fun. And she did meet the girls before, it had been awhile. Actually the last time was before the accident. She tried to push that from her mind so she wouldn’t get upset. Something good was happening and she wasn’t going to ruin it. There was more to this meeting though, it was in Ricky’s expression. He would be happy for his sister, but he looked miserable.

“Ok we do have another announcement,” Brooke said. “Ricky?”

“Sydney is pregnant,” Ricky said sounding bitter.

At first there was only silence then everybody started speaking at once. Then Allie noticed Sammie’s expression. Sammie looked hurt; there was no other way to describe it. Of course she was hurt, she loved Ricky. And Sammie still wanted him to be with her mother. Though Ricky didn’t look happy either, Then again maybe he didn’t want a baby, he’d basically told Sammie he didn’t want kids. So why was his girlfriend pregnant? He didn’t say anything else, just sat there while the others talked. Then he looked up directly at Sammie. She got up from the chair and left the room. Allie would have gone after her if Ricky hadn’t.

Christina and Brooke explained that Sydney schemed and ticked Ricky into getting her pregnant. It seemed like maybe Ricky hadn’t wanted everybody to hear about that. But in the Laiez family you didn’t keep that type of thing to yourself. What Sydney did was basically an unforgivable thing to them. So pretty much they would all look at her differently from now on. They were a close family and they were her family now too. Wildflower got up and came to sit beside her. The topic of conversation switched to something else.

“I wanted to talk to you last night, but I was with Ricky. Are you ok with this? It doesn’t change how we feel about you,” she said.

“You know I’ve always wanted siblings, ones that don’t run away. This will be fun, I especially want little sisters,” Allie told her. It felt good to be excited about something again. And she couldn’t think of anyone that deserved children more than her parents. But she hoped Sammie would be ok.

 

Sammie wanted to be anywhere else in the world but in this house. She felt sick and betrayed. He followed her and she didn’t turn when he called. There was nothing to say he lied to her. Nothing had changed at all; she still wanted him to be what he wasn’t. But this time she kept it to herself and tried not to think about it. He’d told her that he tried to break up with Sydney but he couldn’t. And she accepted it even if she didn’t really understand. She needed to grow up and realize that he was never going to be her father no matter what. It should have just mattered that her mother was being a mother because that was most important.

“Sammie,” he called again and she stopped in the kitchen.

“What? I shouldn’t be upset it’s your girlfriend and you can finally have your own child, that’s fine. It’s your life that has nothing to do with me. I’m not your kid or your responsibility. Go be happy,” she said. All of it was true but it still hurt.

“Trust me when I say that this is the last thing on earth I want. Don’t you think I would say something if I was planning to have a baby? When have I ever lied to you?” He asked and she didn’t want to answer that.

“Why are you having a baby with her then?” She asked because she had to.

“Not by my choice, she wanted me to marry her so she got pregnant. That’s the truth, it wasn’t my plan. I don’t want you to feel bad about this; it doesn’t change how I feel about you. All it’s really done is make me resent Sydney,” he told her.

“Are you going to marry her?”

“Probably not, and I don’t want to be with her either. I never really wanted to be with her but that’s a whole other thing,” he sighed. “It is my child so I will do what I have to and that could mean still living with her.”

“I’m sorry for being a brat,” she said.

“I’d be more offended if you didn’t care,” he replied.

He hugged her then and she felt a little relieved. She shouldn’t have felt that way but she did. While she knew Allie would be happy to have little sisters, she didn’t want this baby to exist. It was another thing keeping him away. After this thing with Sydney he would probably never be with another woman. Then there would be telling her mother all of this. If she felt bad about it this would kill her mother. What if this was what it took to send her mother away? Back to the way she’d been all these years? Then what? Sammie didn’t hate anybody, but she definitely was very close to hating Sydney. How she wished that Sydney would just go away. Everything would be fine then. If Ricky wanted children he could have them with her mother. No matter how illogical all of that was, it was how she felt. Recently she learned that emotions often made no sense at all.

Author's Note

oh i apologize if there are a lot of mistakes..i was test driving my new pen and the word recognition isn't always the best.. especially with my handwriting :)

Reviews

[Tori Barros]

very good. i like it very much. what chapter does she loose her baby