Allie Chapter 31

Allie (Chapter 31) Actions

Chapter 31

 

            Sammie was never really a big celebration kind of girl. But somehow she was talked into wearing a dress to school and a tiara. Lexy brought her a few dresses when she arrived yesterday. While Jordan got to have the day off from school Sammie had to go to school. In her champagne colored sparkly dress. It wasn’t horrible, it fell just above her knees it was a halter dress with a ballerina skirt. Allie was wearing a ballerina skirt with a cami top that showed a little of her stomach. Their other friends dressed up for the occasion too. Being a princess for a day wasn’t entirely as horrible as she thought it would be. Maybe Allie was rubbing off on her. Evan obviously liked her like this.

            At lunch Bianca and Danika brought her cupcakes and they sang happy birthday to her. About halfway through lunch Evan said he wanted to talk to her, alone. She never expected that he’d mostly want to just kiss her. Their relationship was different but she wasn’t exactly comfortable doing anything at home. It was too awkward and she wanted to stay out of trouble. Making out with her boyfriend was definitely not a chore but she knew what he really wanted. She just wasn’t sure about it and neither of them talked about it. After kissing him she was breathless, a lot had changed since her last birthday.

            “Sam, I know I shouldn’t ask but I really want you,” he whispered in her ear.

            “Ok,” she said surprising them both. She’d been thinking about it a lot too ever sense her one night of boldness. If she remembered correctly it wasn’t like the first time at all and she’d been happy.

            “Seriously? I’m not pressuring you its ok to say no,” he said.

            “I think I want to but I wouldn’t feel right doing it at home,” she said and he nodded. The first time she hadn’t been thinking straight and well the 2^nd time she was emotional. Pretty much she wanted to do it just because she wanted to without other factors.

            “Good,” he said and kissed her again.

            Sammie was no longer thinking about her dress that caught everybody’s attention by the time she got to class. She was thinking about Evan and smiling. This was just like Allie on those days when she had sex with Tony at lunch. Only nothing actually happened just kissing. Everything was so different, last year she would never have imagined any of this. For her last birthday she did what she did every year, had a dinner with the Laiezs. It wasn’t like her mother ever really made an effort to celebrate. Allie would try to treat her to something with her mother’s credit card. Jordan never really seemed to care that much about their birthday.

            “You look bliss what did you do?” Allie asked her.

            “Nothing, I just love Evan,” she said. It was god to say that and she never thought her secret crush would lead to this. Her mother was still on the right track and Jordan was going to come home, this was the best birthday ever.

            “Tomorrow I’m getting a tattoo,” Allie said.

            “Don’t you already have a tattoo?” She asked knowing this was probably a bad idea, like the other one.

            “Um I think I have two actually, the second one I was completely wasted,” Allie shrugged. “It’s going to be Tony’s name as a Valentine’s Day gift.”

            “Are you crazy? Do not do that.”

            “Why not? I’ve been forbidden from marrying him so I’m proving commitment.”

            “And what do you think Uncle Nick is going to say? You were like crying after you had your talk with him. He’s going to freak out,” she told her. The other day when Ricky dropped her off she’d gone to talk to her cousin. Allie had been upset when she told her about what he said.

            “They never said I can’t get a tattoo, granted I never asked and I’m not going to. My body my choices, if I really wanted to I can marry Tony. I’m just not going to do it because he would be pissed at me and who knows what he might do,” Allie said.

            “Allie, you’re being really selfish,” Sammie told her. “Do you not think this will stir up some trouble? Create stress when the house is supposed to be a stress-free environment? Do you remember crying when we got back from L.A.?”

            “I guess I didn’t think it through,” Allie sighed. “You’re right; I’m just being erratic again.”

            “Give him something else please,” she urged.

            “Change the subject please so I can try not to be crazy.”

            “I have a question for you actually. Do you um ever feel guilty having sex with Tony in the house?”

            “Um well I never thought about it, except since my freak out we are sleeping together. We haven’t had sex in the house since the garage thing, the truck and stables however have been used. Why? Are you and Evan planning to do something?” Allie asked staring at her in obvious shock.

            “I don’t know,” she shrugged. “Maybe but I’d just feel weird especially after before, you know?”

            “This is why your cousin is a master of getting things done. Do him at the hotel, if you do it during the party nobody will know,” Allie said. “I’ll plan it out, I need a serious distraction.”

            “My life is in your hands,” Sammie replied.

She was starting to worry about Allie again, well she never stopped. What would Allie do once she moved out and Tony left? It seemed there was always going to be something to worry about. So it was a good thing they had the most amazing family ever. Hopefully that would be enough for Allie. Tonight and this weekend Sammie was going to have fun no matter what. Even if that included a little sneaking around.

 

 

            “So are things with my brother really all good and lovey or is this an act?” Carmen asked in her direct Carmen way.

            “We are good, he’s just a little unhappy with Allie right now,” Wildflower admitted. Since that discussion the other day her husband wasn’t happy.  Tomorrow they were going to sit down with the love birds and talk. She didn’t want to take sides but her husband expected her to back him up.

            “What’s wrong with her now? I thought she was back to relatively normal?” Carmen asked.

            “Allie and Tony want to get married,” Brooke answered. “It’s a shame teenagers are closer to getting married than I am.”

            “Cole wants to marry you,” Wildflower said.

            “Don’t even go there, he’s back in town let’s hope he stays the hell away from me,” Brooke sighed.

            “Marriage is highly overrated,” Carmen said. “So who’s better in bed Jay or Cole?”

            “You couldn’t have asked that when I’m not around?” Wildflower asked making a face. She knew way too much about her brothers’ sex life.

            “Like we haven’t had to hear you and Nicky and see him rubbing against you,” Carmen said.

            “I love Jay so yeah it’s better with him. With Cole it was all intensity and no feelings. He doesn’t love me if I was going to marry someone I want to be loved. I get why Jay doesn’t want to be married but it kinda sucks sometimes because it may never happen. That’s what he told me,” she paused. “Maybe I should consider Cole’s offer.”

            “Are you crazy? Jay will marry you just give him time, you what he’s like.”

            “You’re defending him because he’s your brother.”

            “I didn’t say I was breaking up with him.”

            “Yeah he’s my brother but he loves Brooke and that’s a big thing for my family. My brothers don’t fall in love easily or at all. It took Evan how long to tell Sammie he had feelings for her?”

            “Evan is a special case; it took um that same amount of time for him to stop snuggling with his big sister.”

            “Any way Brooke you can’t be serious about this Cole thing. And you never even told Chris you had sex with her brother.”

            “I don’t plan to ever tell her, it’s the past I’m never going to do that again. It was already bad enough telling you I was having sex with your brother.”

            “You didn’t tell me I saw you kissing,” Wildflower replied. Finding out your best friend and brother were having a secret relationship wasn’t all that great.

            “Ok I know I’m sucky friend I can admit it but you didn’t tell me about you and Eric. I had to hear it from Daisy,” Brooke said.

            “Yeah that’s not that bad, I barely told her. Why do you keep bringing him up? And sending him to see me and telling him he should call me?” She asked, it was a little too obvious the reason, Brooke felt guilty.

            “Because you could have loved Eric if you weren’t so anti-kid,” Brooke replied. “Maybe you shouldn’t be with Nicolas, ok? There I said the thing that everybody thinks but tries not to say. Except maybe Ivan because he can’t shut up unless it’s about-”

            “Yes I know,” she said giving her a look.     

            “What are you two arguing about?” Carmen asked looking at them suspiciously. If she ever found out about Ivan and Allie she would tell her brothers, it was a given.

            “Just that Brooke needs to mind her business, I married Nick and I love him. I was never meant to be with Eric and forcing him on me Brooke isn’t going to help anything. Besides you know the fact that I’m married I’m pregnant,” she said a little annoyed.

            “I know but I feel like everybody pushed you towards this and it began with me. And I’m worried that you are so committed to making things work because Ricky told you to. At some point you have to stop letting big brother tell you what to do,” Brooke pointed out.

            “Do you really listen to everything he says?” Carmen asked.

            “Pretty much, but it’s not that bad,” she sighed. “The reason I am with Nick has nothing to do with Ricky or my family’s beliefs about marriage. We are together because I love him, pissed off I couldn’t stop loving him. Everybody knows we rushed into this, big deal? Pointing it out doesn’t change it, we are married and we are having a child together. I’m starting to really get sick of everybody questions my decisions. What should I do? Divorce him and screw up my child’s life before he’s born? Nobody is forcing me to stay here, this is what I want. I never loved Eric we just had sex, like Brooke you never loved Cole. Why is this supposed to be different?”

            “You are right,” Brooke nodded. “I’m sorry; I’ve just seen you so miserable that I want you to be happy.”

            “Why are you still with Nicky?” Carmen asked, it appeared this would never end. “Let’s just be honest, he is all sweet and loving and completely devoted to you. But he is push, controlling and a complete psycho. Ever since I met you I just wondered how you all good and sweet and moral could be with him.”

            “When I met him he was sweet and made me smile and wanted to take care of me. I just love him he’s not always pushy, controlling and psychotic. He totally gave himself to me and he’s tried to change some things for me. But really I can’t stop thinking of how much he loves our son and how he sits and will talk to him. Or that day we went to the beach with Ariela and Joseph. Nick really knows how to love, the way he is with Allie is enough to make you fall for him,” she told them.

            “Its weird to me, I never thought he would have children. Jose either for that matter but Little J was an accident. I know he loves you and worships you; sometimes I worry how that will affect you. He is all or nothing, he is also very stubborn and once he wants something he can be dangerous,” Carmen warned.

            “Really I swear things are good with him,” she assured them.

            “Alright,” Carmen nodded. “Well we need to talk about your lack of a social life. Most women don’t volunteer and play with orphan children; they just hang out with people that make the same amount of money. Yes, recently you’ve had a lot to deal with but you need to get out there. You are Nicolas Capriani’s wife you have to make yourself known. This should be Katrina’s job but obviously that ain’t happening. This weekend is bad for any outings but I’m getting Tara and Carlynn on it. They should have been getting you to go out but of course they are bums.”

            “Do I have to be social? I can just stay home with the kids and avoid potentially stressful situations,” she said. Her life was normal a routine now she didn’t want to go be surrounded by fake people.

            “Nicky use to attend parties and events, then he just stopped to devote himself  to you, but this is important. Networking is just as much your job as it is his.”

            “He says he doesn’t want to pimp me out.”

            “Or he wants to keep you far away from Brazilian business men who speak a language nobody else in your family does.”

            “What business man?”

            “This guy Alejandro Moreno, he was like hitting on me. Nick almost killed him but Jose stepped in,” she explained.

            “Alejandro Moreno! Oh my God! You were hit on by the like David Beckham of Brazil. After being a soccer superstar he took over his father’s business and got richer. He is like the international hottie, you never heard of him?” Carmen asked staring at them.

            “Our soccer star is Sammie,” she replied.

            “I knew I should have Googled him,” Brooke said.

            “Wait, he wants you? In all your pregnant glory?” Carmen asked as if the was crazier than them not knowing who he was.

            “Yeah apparently and he asked Nick to bring me to dinner the other day, but Nick said no. The guy is sexy but a like fill of himself and obviously he’s never been told no. Hmm he’s a lot like Nick in some ways but I didn’t really like him. Really who hits on a pregnant woman in front of her husband and a room full of people? Totally skeevy,” she shook her head.

            “Only you could be in a room with the hottest man in the world and be completely unaffected. I bet I could get him to model for me if you were there,” Carmen said thoughtfully.

            “Funny you mention that because he saw your wonderful ads with me in it. He asked if I was a model, what a creative line.”

            “I wanna see this guy, give me your phone,” Brook said grabbing it off the table.

            “I bet he would do it if I promised him you would do it with him,” Carmen went on. “After the baby of course, it would be perfect for fall. Like before or after fashion week. Oh you could walk in my show again, really you are a natural.”

            “You should have known my sister Daisy; she would love this type of thing. Not me, besides I’d have to lose a lot of weight. And Nick would flip out,” she said. Really he wasn’t the reason she just didn’t like attention.

            “Oh wow he is sexy,” Brooke said obviously finding a picture on Google. “Oh you’re getting a text.”

            “Read it to me,” she replied. It was most likely nothing interesting.

            “I can hire you a trainer, besides you lost a lot of weight by accident it can’t be hard for you,” Carmen said.

            “What part of I don’t want to model don’t you get? I’m not going to piss off my husband for no reason or go near that man. That would give him an excuse to grope me.”

            “Maybe but maybe he won’t be so attracted to you once you aren’t pregnant.”

            “Carmen I am not modeling for you again, before I had a lapse in sanity and was pissed at Nick. Besides it was before I was married, I don’t think a wife should be posing with a skanky man. Oh and did I mention how my brothers and mother reacted to this? My mother almost had a heart attack,” she said. Carmen laughed and so did she it was a little amusing.

            “What the hell is all this?” Brooke asked she was still looking at the phone.

            “What?” Carmen asked, she grabbed the phone and gasped. “Care to explain all these dirty text messages?”

            “Oh that,” she shrugged. They stared at her like she said something crazy. “Does it seem like I’m the cheating type or something? Allie freaked out about them too.”

            “I see a lot of messages from Eric, but are these others from him too?” Brooke asked staring at her.

            “Are you really having an affair?” Carmen asked, they were still staring at her.

            “Those are from Nick,” she sighed. “Really, does everybody think I’m a potential cheater? That’s kind of ironic considering the situation my husband was just in.”

            “You are definitely not the cheating type,” Brooke said. “Was this when you kicked him out?”

            “He came by to talk to me that day you sent Eric over, we had sex. It wasn’t my fault I just couldn’t turn him down I was horny and he knew it. I didn’t want to tell anybody because we weren’t together and I was pathetic,” she admitted.

            “This would have been more interesting if you had revenge sex I would have. But I guess you being pregnant made that hard and you’re too much of a good girl to cheat,” Carmen said.

            Having this conversation for the second time this week made her wonder about a lot of things. Caprianis were all for revenge sex and God knew what else. That wasn’t her it would have been wrong, pregnant or not. Not to mention Ricky would murder her from doing something so stupid. Then Nicolas would literally kill any man that touched her. The fact that he didn’t bring up Eric when he knew she still talked to him wasn’t out of trust exactly. He didn’t want to upset her by talking about something stupid. She was grateful for that because it would be unneeded stress. If he wanted to read her texts she obviously left her phone all over the house so anybody could. She had nothing to hide, except some nasty in a freaky way messages from her husband.

            Modeling was another thing she was thinking about, it wasn’t her. Daisy was the model type and she was not. Even if she wanted to do it the fight with Nicolas over it wasn’t worth it. After the Owen and Sadie and Mindy things she did not want any attention. Maybe if the last month and a half never happened she would have considered it, because it wasn’t awful. With the attention they got over this thing with the stripper she knew sooner or later the fact that she stripped would be made public knowledge. It was never really a secret except from her mother that was still upset about it. What was important that her family knew why she did it and that she hated it completely. She was so grateful for Nicolas removing that stripper pole. Maybe if she wasn’t pregnant she might have teased him a little but Iago saved her from ever having to do that.

            The other part of it was the Alejandro thing. That man just creeped her out a little and she would never want to be alone with him. And she definitely didn’t want to be photographed with him or let him touch her. This wasn’t about her husband it was about her need to stay away from drama and potentially dangerous men. When Owen broke into her house the first time it did scare her a lot. Then he went after Brooke. Strange men made her nervous and Owen use to be a friend. And that was probably why she refused any invitations to these social events that Carmen was talking about. Being home with her family was where she felt safest. She was comfortable and happy with them. Why was she going to go out and let snobby strangers give opinions on her life? It was nobody else’s business.

            “I find it funny that you were sneaking around with your hubby. You got to have a secret affair without actually cheating,” Brooke laughed.

            “Maybe you should make Jay jealous and then he’ll wanna put a ring on it,” Carmen said and they all laughed.

            “Aren’t you too old to quote Beyonce?” Wildflower asked.

            “And just how old do you think she is? Just cause you kiddies like to listen to her doesn’t mean us grown-ups can’t. Marriage isn’t for your twenties I’m telling you both since I’ve been married twice, well three times if you count a vacation to Cabo when I was in college. Jealousy works wonders I’ve gotten a lot out of jealous men before,” Carmen said with a mischievous smile.

            “Even if you weren’t telling me to do this in front of Jay’s wonderful sister that adores me, I couldn’t do it. Maybe like if we were out and it was a stranger, Cole is off limits. I don’t want him to get any ideas and I don’t want Chris to ever know about this. It would be awkward and she has enough to deal with,” Brooke said.

            “What don’t you want me to know?” Christina’s voice came from the doorway. They all turned, they had been in the TV room lounging all day.

            “Did someone leave the door unlocked?” Carmen asked, “Or does everyone but me have a key? Nice to see you though Christina.”

            “I came in with Nicolas,” Christina replied looking at them suspiciously. Sure enough Nicolas came in behind her carrying Ariela. “So what is going on?”

She didn’t look too happy; of course she wouldn’t her mother was attacked. No matter how much your mother pissed you off if she was in danger you help, you only got one mother. Except for maybe Allie but Katrina was never exactly a mother to her anyway. Wildflower knew firsthand about mothers and the havoc they could wreak on your life. Just the fact that her mother was her mother was the reason she was letting her in her life now. That reason was why Ricky gave up his life because no matter what she was their mother. At least thankfully she didn’t ever physically get hurt or hurt anybody else. There was a near miss with a kitchen knife and Christina a few months ago but the was it.

Marguerite was mostly dangerous with her mouth saying the most evil things she could. But only when she was off her meds or when anybody brought up that Ricky was gay. Needless to say that his relationship with Sydney was a miracle to her and made her very happy. She adored Sydney because that meant that her son wasn’t gay. Except that it really didn’t mean that. That relationship was stressing Ricky out a lot since his Brazilian affair with Angel. Though Angel was surprisingly handling it like an adult and was committed to her children. Having her around was a good thing now which was a little shocking because she’d never been this well behaved.

Sammie was happy and that was what mattered most. But Wildflower was a little sad to let Sammie go; at least Angel was proving herself. And the best part was that she was working and saving on her own. If she stayed away from Delanoz and other gross men then she could stay as long as she liked. This big party was Nicolas’ gift to the twins but he also was planning at some point to buy all the teens cars. Tony already had the truck and would take it to school with him. Allie got her convertible from Katrina as a last act of a guilt-stricken woman. Corey and Evan were working on getting licenses, but had yet to pick a family member to practice and teach.

Wildflower didn’t recommend asking any of their brothers because they did more harm than good when she wanted to drive. In the end Eric taught her but mostly as an excuse for them to be alone without any suspicion. When she really thought about it she had spent a lot of time with him in the past. Maybe that was how Ricky knew about their thing. How the rest of her brothers never noticed was a little surprising. But of course Ricky was the oldest and the watcher and kept an eye on everybody. That meant that he most likely knew about Jay and Brooke before she did. Everybody confided in him and he made the rules and the peace, he was amazing like that.

Right now Christina looked like maybe she came over to get away from her house. Her mother was staying there because she was afraid to go home. Her father was missing. That was how her mother got beat up; she was home alone when some men came to the door. Apparently daddy owed some money, a lot of money, to some people. His wife’s attack was like a message. It was like something out of a movie really, but everything seemed to be these days. Just a bad movie plot and it had Christina on edge. She’d just calmed down from her last encounter with her father when he threatened Ariela.

Now she had to worry about her mother and the possibility of people shopping up at her house. And she had to worry for her siblings even if they betrayed her in the past. Just the fact that she made it over today for the twins’ dinner party was amazing. The last thing she needed to hear was about Cole’s sex life. Or his possible intentions to start something with one of his friends. After this party weekend she wanted to do something nice for Christina to help her with all the stress. Stress seemed to be weaving its way through the family in a big way. Everybody needed a vacation, maybe she needed to take Christina and Brooke and just have a girl’s weekend at the beach house or a spa. That idea was nice, she was going to make it happen.

“Um why don’t you sit so I can tell you the truth cause making up a lie is too hard right now. Unless you can provide me with one, Carmen,” Brooke said and Carmen made a face at her.

“I’m best at lying when I’m drunk and I’ve been good today no afternoon drinking,” Carmen said.

“Chris, I kind of had sex with your brother,” Brooke said.

“What?” Christina asked looking around at all of them.

“You should start out with the years ago part,” Wildflower offered. “Chris what she means to say is that she had a brief relationship with your brother before we knew you. And she didn’t realize he was your brother until she saw him on Thanksgiving.”

“Oh please don’t tell me you are the woman he told me about,” Christina said. “He said he met someone the last time he was here and I didn’t pay it much attention.”
            “I hope he isn’t talking about me,” Brooke replied.

“He said she was blonde and pretty,” Christina replied. She was sitting in a chair her head obviously spinning.

Thankfully Nicolas had taken Ariela into the kitchen. So while everybody tried to grasp the potential situation Wildflower excused herself. That conversation needed to end because Jay would be over after he got off of work. He was their chef for the evening and had cooked half the meal last night since he had to work. She really hoped her brother didn’t have to deal with this Cole thing. If Brooke pushed or purposely tried to make him jealous they would be over. Her brothers didn’t do games and she wanted to stay out of this. Jay loved Brooke and love and trust weren’t easy for her family, except with each other. Part of the reason Jay could even love Brooke as much as he did because he knew her for a long time. How she fell face first and head over heels in love so easily with a stranger was a huge mystery. Nicolas just wasn’t like other men; everything about him was uniquely him.

“Hey, I was going to tell you we should talk,” he said when she came in.

“I didn’t get a “hi my beautiful wonderful amazing wife”? Where is the love? Monster do you love me?” She asked Ariela.

“I love you and baby,” Ariela told her.

“Thank you sweetie, I love you too,” she kissed her little nose.

“Wife, I love you,” Nicolas said wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her neck.

“Why are you even home at 1 in the afternoon? I don’t see ice cream so what are you doing here?” She asked playfully, she knew what he wanted to talk about.

“The boss gets to do whatever the hell he wants,” he replied. “We need to talk about Allie and Tony.”

“Why? You put your foot down and told her no and that my opinion doesn’t matter,” she said. This wasn’t what she wanted to talk about, so she kept her back to him. Looking at Ariela kicking her feet and sipping a juice box while sitting on the counter was more pleasant. She had a doll tucked under her arm and of course wearing her Hello Kitty necklace.

“Do you honestly think they should get married?” He asked pulling her around to face him.

“No I don’t, but I think it’s not our decision to make. They can do it and I would rather know about it then for them to sneak around. When Allie wants something you know how she is, consequences be damned of course. If Ricky directly tells Tony no, he won’t go against him, not even for her. But he’s not going to do that, they have to be allowed to make their own adult decisions and learn. I know my brothers ok? And Tony would stick it out if he married her and he sincerely wants to be with her forever. Allie was raised in a disaster of a home where marriage wasn’t ever serious; this is serious to my family. So I worry she won’t be able to handle this type of thing. Do I think 18 year olds should be married? Hell no, have you met my sister? I just don’t think its right to threaten them into submission,” she told him.

“You have your beliefs and I have mine,” he said. “You know Tony and I know how Allie works and she wouldn’t last in this permanently. The fact that she’s with him this long is amazing, considering all the damage Katrina has done. All of your siblings and your weird Ricky’s word is law thing, is what works for you. Allie needs somebody to tell her no and give her boundaries and structure. Say we let this happen, what do you think will happen when Tony is gone? They’ve never been away from each other, it’s going to be bad.”

“We need to compromise so I think they should start with some premarital counseling type stuff, Melissa gave me some numbers. This way they can at least make a plan for the future. If next year comes around and they want to get married there isn’t anything we can do. I just don’t want to push them away or lose either of them,” she said.

“Alright,” he nodded. Hopefully it would be this easy talking to the love birds tomorrow. Allie was just still too unpredictable and everybody knew it.

 

 

                Ricky went over in his head about a million times what he wanted to say to Sydney. This had to end it wasn’t healthy and she deserved to be happy. He did still feel guilty about what happened with Angel. But it was just prove he didn’t need to be in a relationship. Not that he really considered his thing with Sydney a relationship. He loved her yes, but what did that even really mean? If love was all it took then he’d have married Angel when he was a teenager. He meant what he said to Sammie, he was just done. This situation was impossible for everyone involved. The thing with Sammie and Jordan made this decision for him.

            Sydney was on the couch when he got home. He’d gone to dinner for the twin’s birthday. They argued about this already and about him spending time with Sammie. This was his fault and he owned up to that. But he couldn’t take the fighting or the drama anymore. He did something he shouldn’t have but didn’t regret. That was the thing he couldn’t regret it even though he really should. Sydney knew everything that happened and she chose to stay with him. Though he didn’t expect her to continue to hold it over his head and constantly want a full account of his day. His sister had trouble in her marriage so he went to stay with her, Sydney cried and cried and guilted him for it. The whole time he stayed he probably said two words to Angel.

            “Where were you?” Sydney asked, he was trying to remember to be gentle about her feelings.

            “I told you it was Sammie’s and Jordan’s birthday, my family had a dinner,” he told her. He was careful not to sound as annoyed as he was. His parents never cared this much about where he went and what he did. Then again they always trusted him, too bad he was just a disappointment.

            “Why did you need to go there? Those aren’t your kids unless there’s something you aren’t telling me. Did you get some alone time with your w***e?” She asked, she was enough to make someone start drinking heavily. And he was very close to that becoming his life.

            “No they are not my kids but my siblings aren’t my kids either and I took care of them all. Angel has nothing to do with how I feel about her kids and you know that because I told you,” he paused. “Did I also tell you that Angel wants nothing to do with me? She’s loved me for about 26 years that’s basically all her life. I love her too and God help me I love you. And I did something that hurt you and I am sorry for it. There is no excuse I shouldn’t have been with her, it was my choice. She didn’t throw herself at me, I went to her. I am not good at this relationship thing because I haven’t had one in a very long time. That is part of the reason I didn’t want to get so involved with you but you kind of left me no choice there. I have always been honest with you about everything.”

            “What are you saying? You’re um going to be with her? Why because she dangled her fatherless children in front of you? D-did she just pretend to stay away to get you to want her?” She asked sniffling and then once again she was crying. The tears made this harder everything about this was way too hard. He never wanted to hurt her especially like this.

            “Syd,” he sighed and sat down beside her. Of course she curled up against him and he held her because he could help it. “Why are you still here, huh? You aren’t happy with me and you don’t trust me so I don’t understand. I’m not cheating on you like you think I am. Everything that happened with Angel happened on that trip and we don’t really speak now. Yes I see her because she lives in my sister’s house but I’m pretty much never going to be with her. I’ve known that my whole life. I shouldn’t have ever been with her and I really shouldn’t have been with you. My own personal issues aren’t an excuse to drag you into my mess.”

            This was for the best, she deserved so much better. Sydney gave herself completely to love and he loved that about her. Sometimes she drove him crazy but he did love her. It was pretty impossible not to, she wouldn’t let you. He knew that she had been hurt before of course it was cheating. So on some level he got her moodiness lately. But he didn’t get why she stayed. What was the point? Hadn’t he proven that it was impossible for him to ever do what he was supposed to? He was supposed to just love Sydney and be with her, she’d compromised a lot for him. If he hadn’t let her into his life none of this would have ever happened. Why he did he still wasn’t certain about.

            At first he thought of her as a gift. A way to show him the life he should have had, to fix it all. Nope, he screwed up and he was now no straighter than he ever had been. His father was wrong about the choice, he didn’t choose this. It was something that happened to him and he fought against most of his life. If he couldn’t be with Angel before why did he think he could be with Sydney? That open relationship thing just provided an excuse, but he didn’t believe in it. There were a lot of things he didn’t believe in that seemed enviable. He wanted to marry Sydney and have children and a normal life. Why was that so wrong? Why couldn’t he have that? Angel coming home and behaving like the person he use to know definitely confused him. But no matter what the truth was that he couldn’t be with either of them, it would be wrong.

            Sitting her holding her while she cried again made him feel worse. This wasn’t fair and she’d cried too much over this. What he needed to do was help her pack and send her home. The tears couldn’t make him let this go on. Ultimately if they stayed together it would end in heartache. He was trying to spare her pain but she couldn’t let go. Neither could he. Facing the truth was too hard apparently that went for both of them. His need to try to be normal was strong than anything else. Or more correctly his need to be what his father thought was normal was stronger than his common sense.

            “I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone, I can’t stop loving you. That is why I’m here I can’t be mad enough to leave. Yes there is probably something wrong with me but I love you. And I guess I get your attachment to her children but its hard. All of this is hard and you are looking at me like you are going to break up with me. Maybe you never wanted to be with me and I forced myself on you. But that was because I knew that we should be together. Somehow I thought what would eventually come between us would be men. Not another woman,” she said.

            “Syd, eventually that would be it, I can’t plan a future with you. It’s easier to be in denial about who I am if I’m alone,” he replied. It surprised him that she smiled.

            “I’m not ashamed of you Ricky; I love you no matter what. I hate that you have all this guilt and shame; I wish I could make it go away. At this point I doubt years of therapy could make you let this go. You are the man I love most in this world, no matter what. We can make this work, I know it. And I do have to just trust that you aren’t going to be with her again. On some grown up rational level I do understand what happened with her. You loved her and you couldn’t be with her anymore. Now things in your life changed and you remembered how it was with her. Maybe it’s partially my fault for being jealous and annoying when I first saw her. I can get past this, but I couldn’t recover if you left me,” she told him. Yup, here came more guilt, whether she meant it or not he wasn’t sure about.

            Hadn’t he made up his mind about this? All this understanding was probably the worst part of it. Why couldn’t she hold onto her anger and hate him? No she had to do the opposite and make this impossible. How could he break up with her now? He’d been trying to do it since she decided, the day after they met, that he was her soul mate. The crazy clingy thing should have been enough but he couldn’t do it. Now he was starting to understand his brothers more than he ever had before. Still he knew this was going to end and end badly. That should have been enough to tell her to go. But he’d recently become very good at making bad choices and it was just going to continue. He wiped her tears away and kissed her. This had to be one of the most selfish things he’d ever done. The worse was definitely yet to come.

 

            Tony didn’t want to have this discussion at all but it was unavoidable. What made it about ten times worse that Ricky was sitting in on this. It was bad enough for his sister to have to deal with this. He wanted to forget it in the interest of not stressing her out. Too bad Allie just had to open her big mouth. This wasn’t the right time for this that was why he didn’t say anything. When she told him what she said and what she was told, he tried to calm her down. That night she’d been so upset because she made her “parent” fight. For him he couldn’t really call his sister and brother-in-law his girlfriend’s parents. It sounded wrong any way you looked at it. Little did anybody know he completely agreed with Nicolas.

            This whole mess was his fault he’d asked her to marry him and told her he wanted to marry her in the summer at the beach house. He hadn’t thought any of that through and now he really had to. Allie was more fragile than she knew and it was showing more everyday. It definitely started with the separation and it wasn’t getting better. So what could he do? If he told her he sided with Nicolas she would freak out. She expected him to fight for her but he was starting to think time apart would be good for them. They were together way too much and she needed to get use to being away from him.

            They were gathered in the lounge, the hotel was basically empty because of the party. Who wanted to be bothered with a sweet 16 if they didn’t have to? Everybody was chaperoning so that parents could be at ease with this whole slumber party. There was a movie and food at the indoor pool. This was party was definitely MTV worthy. His sister and Allie were curled up together in a chair. Allie had been acting strangely all day but he’d figured it was nerves. There were four chairs in this circle so he got to be in between Ricky and Nicolas.

Everybody blamed him for this because he was supposed to responsible. The fact that he wanted to marry someone nobody expected to be responsible or make good decisions said a lot. He loved Allie and she wasn’t a burden to him, he learned how to deal with her. And he wanted so bad to make her happy, but he had to do what was responsible. If she couldn’t be responsible he had to be responsible enough for the two of them. In the last month he came to realize they probably should get married after college as apposed to before. They could get a place together and live together just the two of them and truly see if this was what they wanted. If he married her that was it no going back and he knew he was too back and forth with this. She had no idea he changed his mind, he could really talk to her. Allie was still like a ticking bomb waiting to go off, no matter how normal she was acting.

            “Ok so Nick and I were talking and we think that if the two of you are really serious about this than you should do premarital counseling,” his sister said.

            “I already do enough therapy,” Allie said.

            “Yes but that is different,” Wildflower replied.

            “We’ll do it,” Tony said. That got him a dirty look from Allie. “They aren’t asking a lot it might be useful.”

            “This is stupid its not a big deal, we want to get married not have a baby. We already both live together and sleep together so what’s gonna change?” Allie asked, she never accepted no it was a Capriani thing.

            “Just out of curiosity how do you plan to support yourselves? Tony won’t be working when he’s at school, he won’t have time,” Ricky said eerily calm. Later he would get yelled at, he did deserve it though.

            “Allie before you say that what you have a trust fund, you don’t,” Nicolas said. “Can’t live off of Katrina’s credit cards either, she doesn’t think you should get married either.”

            “I think you are both old enough to understand what a huge commitment marriage is and what is expected of you. I also think you should be free to make your own decisions without threats,” Wildflower said. She paused to look at her husband and Ricky.  “And yes Allie we didn’t wait, but you are both going to college and have a future. Being married isn’t easy or always fun and I don’t believe that you both want to do this. I just don’t want either of you to feel like you have to go sneak around and get married. If you wait you’ll just love each other more.”

            There was silence; they wanted them to say something. Allie was staring at him like she was searching his eyes. If he was sleeping with her tonight he would definitely be kicked out of bed. Pretty much there were no words that could make this better for her. She was going to be pissed at him no matter what. Even if she didn’t know it yet this was for the best. They were right about everything; the two of them had no money and no real jobs. Allie never worked a day in her life she was spoiled, his job wasn’t enough to support anybody. And there was just no way he could work, go to school and play football, like Ricky said. The right decision was obvious and logical, too bad Allie’s brain didn’t always accept logic.

            “Waiting won’t be a problem,” he said. The four of them stared at him, whatever the consequences he had to do what was best. Hopefully she could be made to understand. If not nobody had to worry about a wedding happening anyway.

 

            Nicolas was down at the bar with his brother having a drink. Dealing with 20 or so teens made alcohol a necessity. Not that his wife would approve, she didn’t like him drinking for obvious reasons. He needed to reflect on what happened with that discussion earlier. Obviously he’d given Tony too little credit; he was definitely a lot like him. Or how he was when he was 18, a lot could change in 11 years. Tony knew when to bow out gracefully and do what was right. There was no need to worry about some silly teenage wedding, but Allie’s fragile sanity was in question. Right about now Tony would be trying to calm her down and convince her that waiting was for the best. Clearly the boy really thought this whole stupid idea through and realized it was a bad decision. One less thing for him to worry about and the potential for another issue.

            “I have a problem,” Jose said finally. That much had been obvious all week.

            “The wife or the nanny?” He asked, women were always Jose’s problem.

            “I haven’t heard for Jasmine, but yes nanny,” Jose sighed.

            “You lasted longer than I thought you would,” he said.

            “Thanks for having so much faith in me.”

            “Do you feel guilty about it?”

            “Not really, but I thought I had more willpower, guess not.”

            “Jose, be honest, you never expected to be with Jasmine that long anyway. One day it’s she thinks you will cheat and take the baby and another he might not be yours. Oh my favorite was the one with you spending more time with Joseph than her. Now she has to find herself? She’s 35 years old if she doesn’t know who she is by now she never will. I will find her if you want but you should cut your losses. You still have your son and Nanny Lindsay caters to whatever you need. Jasmine made this happen, you’ve done everything you could for her it wasn’t meant to be,” he told him.

            “I knew what you would say, but you wouldn’t let it go if it was Wildflower,” Jose pointed out.

            “She wouldn’t leave her child ever no matter what and she knows what it means to be a wife. Unlike Jasmine she isn’t selfish, what Jasmine is doing is selfish. You tried and then she cuts off all communication, she knows you have a young pretty nanny. What did she think would happen? I think she needs to do some groveling for you to take her back. So what you’re nanny is taking care of what your wife isn’t, that is Jasmine’s fault. If she wants to see her son she’ll get over it. You have no idea where she is or who she’s with. Her track record is pretty damn clear, she owes you,” he said.

            “Leave it to you to justify my affair,” Jose laughed.

            “Sometimes the lines between right and wrong aren’t so clear,” he replied.

            “And you should know,” Jose shook his head. “At least D won’t be lonely in Hell, we’ll be right there with him.”

            “I know, at least there is hope for our children,” he said.

            “Yeah, I guess that’s what makes this all sort of worth it,” Jose sighed. “I want to know where she is and what she’s been doing.”

            “Good, I’ll have that information for you soon,” he said.

Of course he was having Jasmine watched; this was the woman his brother loved. Jose would do the same for him not that it would ever be necessary. One good thing that came out of this scandal was his wife no longer wanted her “alone time”. That at least he could control, and she would never behave like Jasmine. He wasn’t going to ever cheat on his wife or he hoped not to. But he didn’t really see a problem with what Jose was doing because Jasmine pushed him there. She’d been torturing him for years and she probably kept her pregnancy a secret as a strategy. There could never have been a question of if Jose would take care of his child or not.

Jasmine manipulated the hell out of Jose and he let it go for his son and did everything he was supposed to. Women were trouble, except his wife, because he was in control. As long as she didn’t find out what he did, she would always forgive him though. That was something he was certain about. She belonged to him and always would. Jasmine needed to be under control and learn her place. Jose deserved to be happy and he would help him. That was what brothers did.

 

 

Sammie was in a dark purple dress, she didn’t know how to describe it really. It was just beautiful and she didn’t hate it or her party dress. She never thought she would be the type of girl to do a dress change halfway through a party. Of course she also never thought she would willingly put a dress on and definitely not two in one night. A hair and make-up team came in earlier and she didn’t hate that either. She had on a tiara and a gold mask; it was like playing a part. So tonight she could be anyone she wanted to be. Which obviously included sneaking off to possibly have sex with her boyfriend, this her had way more confidence. Tonight she was a mix between her mother and Allie. And who knew how long that could last.

Allie had done a great job planning out this party. It was like a purple and gold color theme complete with lighting. There were flower arrangements, a huge assortment of foods and drinks and they got a lot of gifts. The ball room was completely adult free, they were off in another room but of course. Dancing, taking pictures and being silly with her friends was pretty amazing. She was glad that she was having a party especially with Jordan. Spending time with him again made her happy. Then Allie came to go with her to change her dress. Thus was the grand plan, Evan would already be upstairs waiting for her.

“Stop being nervous,” Allie told her in the elevator.

“Can’t help it,” Sammie sighed. “So are you and Tony good yet?”

“I don’t know, he just caught me off guard with what he said. Maybe he is right and they are right and I am just crazy. It’s just that I would have preferred for him to tell me he changed our plans before all that happened. Whatever, this is your night so be happy,” Allie said. “I’ll wait for you just remember to put the other dress on.”

“Thank you,” Sammie said. “Really for everything, you are the best sister ever.”

“No I’m not but you are,” Allie replied.

“Allie,” she started it was obvious she was going to cry.

“Samantha go see Evan, I didn’t come up with an elaborate scheme for you to waste it. I’m fine, I need a time out,” Allie said dismissively.

“Are you sure?” She asked still concerned.

“I’ll see you soon-ish,” Allie said. With a wave she headed down the hall.

Sammie took a deep breath and opened the door with the keycard hidden in her bra. There he was waiting for her on the bed. This was what she wanted right? She loved him and he’d seen her naked several times now. Maybe she should have taken Abby up on her offer to drink a little. No, what she had to remember was that tonight she wasn’t timid Sammie who was afraid of sex. She was fearless and she already knew she could seduce him, not that it was needed. Evan met her halfway across the room and kissed her.

“Did I tell you how beautiful you look?” He asked and she smiled.

“Yes, you did a few times,” she replied.

“I love you,” he whispered in her ear while pulling down the zipper in the back. Slow deep breathes; she had to remember to keep breathing.

Reviews

[deeps]

This is one long and amazing chapter here. So much detail and amazing imagery as well. I like this chpater.