Rat Tale

My first ballad! I feel like a proud papa.

For years a rat lived underground.
Well, actually not ...
far under house it could be found ~
a cozy little spot.

Old lady grey climbed up the stair,
once in a while thought,
she heard suspicious noise down there;
foul critters to be got.

So rat tried not to make a sound.
By day hid, never caught.
But wondered why old lady frowned,
when could be just forgot.

And then one morn' it took a dare,
at risk of being shot,
to watch Ms. Grey in daylight's glare;
surprise is what she brought.

She carried nuts ~ must weigh a pound.
Amazed was rat to spot
her scatter nuggets all around.
"How could she let them rot!"

But then she called to squirrels fair,
who came at quite a trot.
Now would they care to really share?
A hope that was for naught.

'Cause life for rat was hard as ground ...
forever hunger fought.
Imagined life could change profound;
the rodent starts to plot.

"What was so diff'rent, they from me?
My stringy rump is bare.
but all the rest the same I see ~
their tails do have flair."

Then in the dead of night it bound,
hot on the tail where
some squirrels slept so deep 'n sound.
Let fluffy dreams beware!

"I would not do this normally.
I hope just one could spare.
I really am so DAMN hungry
I cannot even care."

The rat chewed through the bone like hound.
So quick you had to stare.
With that ... appendage came unbound;
a tush that it could wear.

"Now if I do this carefully,
and make a slight repair,
I'll soon be eating nuts for free;
old lady will not scare."

Rogue rat learned mimics can confound
old lady squirrel pair.
It hopped and twitched ... became renowned,
for just a bit of hair.

"Not only am I made lonely,
my envy would be fair.
I hope to be like family.
A squirrel I declare!"

Deceived? This tale will astound;
explains this whole affair.
A rat admired ... bare butt now crowned
it's brand new derriere.

2022

Author's Note

Everyone has probably heard the phrase, "what's the difference between a rat and a squirrel? A fluffy tail."

I've had this idea bouncing around in my head for a bit. Wanted to do it as a sonnet but 14 lines wasn't going to cut it. Tried to stop at 14 quatrains, but just had to get the derriere in there. Writing a ballad is almost as difficult as a sonnet, and as satisfying.

Reviews

[Ookpik]

Ah, "The Emperor's New Clothes" meets "Maus."

Nicely done here, Mr. Reeves. Though if I'm being honest it's hard not to get a little bristly when I hear the word "rat" appear too often and in sequence.

Is it too much to ask if there's a passive-aggressive little barb to this one? At times it's difficult to tell.

-Ook

[William Michael Reeves]

I looked for other words for sure! Wretch. There were a few but didn't like 'em. Rogue was the only one I used. Thought about capitalizing Rat to make it a name. That might have helped. Thanks for twitching in honesty and hopping to my page. Read you soon Ook!

Billigami

[Ookpik]

Lol why did you just dodge the question?

[Ookpik]

You left, but to clarify: both stories I mentioned are great, Maus even won a Pulitzer, but it's really difficult not to read what you've written here as provocation.

The way you use ellipses is unusual, and I've seen it done before (many, many times). I tend to get defensive when I see material like this. Plus, given the nature of the word, if somebody implied that I were a rat in a public place, I would consider that crossing a line and more than likely would start leaning towards the physical.

Everybody has a line, Bill, and the word "rat" gravitates pretty close to mine.

I hope I'm wrong, and that it wasn't your intent to do this, but if I'm not I have a right to be direct.

Hope you understand.

-Ook

[William Michael Reeves]

I'm starting to think I'm missing something here. Stepped out to eat. If the question was about the rat's passivity and aggressive nature. I felt it was ashamed of it's behavior and admits in the end it was more lonely than hungry. You refer to something of yours. Should I read one of your poems? Did I touch on something you've written?

[Ookpik]

No Michael, I was refering to something else. It's possible that I misread, but regardless appreciate your taking the time to answer

Enjoy your meal.

-Ook

-Ook

[Cherrie Palmer]

Wonderful and hilarious I really liked it

[William Michael Reeves]

I thought you would.

Isn't poetry amazing! We can write about rats stealing tails and weapons of war. Foxes listening to the wind and lost children. Feel and laugh and cry. Poetry is as big as the sky!!! Thank you Cherrie pie. (The rhyme made me do it. Blame billigami, 'tis all on he!)

[Cherrie Palmer]

It's always his fault. He can't behave.

[Chris Shaw]

Well you have succeeded here Bill in making someone who is not partial to rats, to actually feel sorry for it:) Poor little rat having to resort to drastic measures to fill its belly. I admire you tackling form. It requires much patience and counting of beats. 8/6/8/6. Well done you.

Chris

[William Michael Reeves]

Thank you Chris. Now that I've got a ballade under my belt becoming obsessed with them. Couple more coming.

The rats do what they need to do. The squirrels do seem to have it easy, but certainly don't deserve that. The old lady grey is blissful in her ignorance ... and poor eyesight!

[Aura]

Let's see if I interpreted thus correctly: so a rat lives in Ms Grey's home, or under the home and this rat is starving. It sees the old lady bring nuts but that's for the squirrels. The rat decides to change his behind to look like a squirrels, so that the rat resembles a squirrel. The old lady wouldn't be afraid of the rat as a result. But this was nicely written I enjoyed your rhymes, and the story you told, so lighthearted and I found it funny, that the rat tried to fluff its derriere to look like a squirrel haha!

[William Michael Reeves]

You're interpretation is rat on the money. Though it does have motives revealed at the end. Loneliness. Envy. Ms. Grey turned out to be a recurring character. I write about her in 'To Play With Colored Clay' too. I had planned to write just a laugh, but it took a darker turn, as poems will do.

I'll come get a sense of your Aura soon, thanks

Bill

[Einstein Noodle]

so after all that .. poor rat ended with a bare butt? ... arrrrrrrrrgh! his envy did confound for sure ..his intent like tail unbound ;) only thing missing (besides two tails) is the tune .. how about singing it for us? :))))))))))))))))))) i admire your determination to complete the story and stick so well with abab .. when i even begin to think of it .. i get a headache .. i must agree .. for me .. pretty much just as difficult .. fun read .. i think i relate most to one of the squirrel's friends .. looking on in shock and empathy .. poor rat seems so alone throughout ... :(
E.

[William Michael Reeves]

Nope, you didn't quite catch the end. Rat was admiring his butt that now wears a fluffy crown. Determination is required when keeping a rhyme going. Thanks for seeing that. The 8/6 syllable count does lend itself to a song. Don't get me started! I've sung many of my poems. If I ever figure out how to record and post ... Thanks Gene

[Einstein Noodle]

ahhhhh thanks for the correction! i thought he chopped his own tail and then couldn't keep his fluff stuck ... makes so much more sense to me now ... totally misunderstood the closing .. there is a way to record .. people do it .. Pryde comes to mind .. Robert Trakofler ... perhaps they could help .. i'd love to hear it sir! :)

[William Michael Reeves]

I think about that a lot. I listened to Robert and Gouwnah reciting their poetry. I have a 20th century brain trying to function in the 21st. On my mind though. DeTAILS deTAILS deTAILS! If only I had more rhyme I would explain how he tied the fluffy tail to his stringy tail to make it an even taller tale!

[Einstein Noodle]

:) .. well .. you and i are on that same 20th century .. my kids are always wise cracking about my flip phone ;}

[Katriya]

I hate rats!! Though I enjoyed reading your ballade and felt sorry for your rat. well versed on rat's life.
Good job !

[William Michael Reeves]

Yeah butt, we should cut this rat some slack. It did admit the true motive, and made an attempt to repair the damage done. Thanks shafrini. Read you in the future.

Bill

[Katriya]

You're most welcome!

[lightsong]

DON'T TRY IT! I WON'T LIKE ANY RAT NOT EVEN THIS ONE!!! and HE can NOT deceive me with his fake crown 😏.

great Great GREAT one Bill! You made the prefect choice making this a Ballade, first it's a tale and it would be long, second RAT and a sonnet! I don't think it would be appealing, specially considering that one of my nicknames is Sonnet. So GOUWNIE and RAT?! never!!!!! anyway, really You did an amazing job here, and thank You so much for adding fun and laughter when it's most needed here.

[William Michael Reeves]

Much needed! Glad to add and take the bad sad that makes us mad. Thanks Gouwnah!

[lightsong]

How come your "RAT" tale became more recognized than our poem?!? WOW so much unfairness 😭😭😭

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

A funny and bizarre tale, or tail, of deciet. Excellent piece of poetry, Will.

[William Michael Reeves]

A rather long tail of a tall tale told. Thanks Carlos.

[John the Baptist]

Are you channeling your inner Dave Brown? This one has the flavor of some of his wilder offerings, which in turn remind me of Dr. Seuss. Then again, maybe all of you are channelling your inner Brothers Grimm.

[William Michael Reeves]

I'll have to read some Dave Brown. Thanks. Meant for this to be all fun, but it did take a dark, rather Grimm turn there. All on it's own, let me assure you. Thanks John