Diamonds in the Dirt

Heartbreak floats in the cigarette smoke

Tears fill up the whiskey cup

Lipstick smeared across her face

No more dignity, no more grace

Broken glass glistens like diamonds in the dirt

A fake smile shines like razorblades through the hurt

Heartbreak floats in the cigarette smoke

Tears fill up the whiskey cup

Smeared mascara tells tales of sadness

Drunken rants tell stories of madness

Love letters unwritten sit on her heart

A lost love has ripped her soul apart

Heartbreak floats in the cigarette smoke

Tears fill up the whiskey cup

Reviews

[Chris]

Behind my eyes is a pic held in place by innumerable realities lived and measured. The repetition was not lyrical ...it was societal.

[BBP]

I like that!

[Michael X]

heartbreak and sadness always make for good poetry, you prove this point well!

[BBP]

Thank you Michael ! It's the best combo to make poetry I'm pretty sure :)

[Paul Bell]

You can see the despair in this poem. Which is actually hard to do. No going back for this girl.

[BBP]

Thanks Paul! Nope she's done for ... Just saving up for that bullet lol

[Hebe]

Dispair felt in the discription and so real ..... felt the pain! Great piece!

[BBP]

Thank you Hebe! :)

[Jimmy Yetts]

Smartly written; rich in art and craft.
Stunning imagery that does what it set out to do..
Work with definite impact, Bev!

[BBP]

Thank you very much!

[barleygirl]

This sounds like it could be made into a country song. Interesting unusual form with different rhyme schemes. I love the title & how you used it once, but would've liked to see it more thru-out your message, maybe as part of the refrain. You've word-painted a recognizable mood.

[BBP]

Thanks barley! Yeah I have no idea what I'm doing I just rhyme
One way or another lol

[Gee]

Yep like this, could do with it continuing on.

[BBP]

Thanks Gee... Not a bad idea ... i just don't have an attention span for long writes lol... Even my books 3 years in the making lol

[Gee]

Guess I'm the same. Could never write a book, just about manage my name

[BBP]

Lol! just about manage me name hahahha

[Jennesis]

ouch. I felt like I could see the dark bar and smell the whiskey. Nice job-

[BBP]

Thank you! :)

[Lorry]

A piece that most, if not all can relate to, beautifully capturing the cloying atmosphere as we wallow in the memories that are and the could have been's that didn't.
Standout line is "Love letters unwritten sit on her heart", now that we can all definitely relate too. Love it.

[BBP]

Thanks Nemo!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

"Smeared mascara tells tales of sadness
Drunken rants tell stories of madness
Love letters unwritten sit on her heart
A lost love has ripped her soul apart"
These are breath-takingly beautiful lines for me! Deeply touched me.. Some of us do try to forget our sorrows by taking the help of that dangerous smoke 😉
I liked reading this..

[BBP]

Thank you Yumna for your sweet review. I am glad you liked it.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

You are welcome, Bev! My pleasure ☺