COOL JOE, Chapter 5

COOL JOE, Chapter 5

A Story by Betty Hermelee
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Sylvia's worries about Robbie

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COOL JOE, Chapter 5
SYLVIA

Our mouths stay open a few minutes after Robbie is taken, shoved out the door by those damn henchmen. Once we can take a deep breath, we both start to cry. Simone comes to sit on my lap and just bawl. I try to calm her by saying that dad will be back shortly. They’re having a meeting at the boss’s house, that’s all. She’s so smart she doesn’t believe me. I’m scared to death, they’ll hurt Robbie. Everything is about money and loan sharks with these guys. It’s all illegal stuff anyway. They don’t have bank accounts like ordinary people. They keep the dough hidden somewhere. It’s all cash, under the mattress.

 

About an hour after they drag Robbie out, we get a call from him. He sounds muffled.

“Hey Sylvia, I can’t talk loud, cause I’m bein tapped, I’m sure, but the bosses want to have a meeting with me; I think it’s about the loan but not sure. I’ll call you back in a few. Are you okay? And Simone? I feel terrible the way these clowns handled it this morning but, you know, that’s their style, rough and tough. I love you, p***y cat. Gotta get off now.”

 

And, he hung up. I thought to myself, why are they taking him to a meeting when he’s got a month to pay off the loan. I really don’t get it, but I kinda do, cause they’re all crooks, think they can get away with anything and won’t get caught by the cops. In fact, the cops get paid off by the mobs. They have their own phony legal system, what a joke.

 

Simone stops whimpering and leaves the comfort of my lap.

“What’s with these guys taking dad away like that?”

Well honey, you know this business as well as I do.”

How did dad get himself involved with these crooks?”

“It’s very easy, first of all, he’s in a business crawling with crooks; then they just suck you in with gifts and promises. He fell for it.”

“Mom, do you think dad is a crook?”

it’s a very casual relationship and no it’s not the same.”

“Then why are they taking him away?”

“That’s what we’ll find out when dad calls back.”

“In the meantime, get yourself ready, you’re already late for school.”

“Can’t I stay home today?”

“Absolutely not!”

 

About an hour later I get a call. It’s Robbie.

“Hello p***y cat, not such good news.”

“What is it Robbie, tell me!”

“Well they say I stole money from the garbage business, which is owned by one of the bosses; in other words, they’re calling it embezzlement or something like that. But p***y cat, you know me, I wouldn’t steal a dime from anyone. I may take out a loan, but never steal. I think they’re using me as a pawn in this nonsense, cause I didn’t do nothin. I think they’re tryin to protect someone else higher up than me and sticking me with the blame.”

“Oh, my lord Robbie! That’s terrible” and I begin to shed some tears. I know you’re not a thief, I swear, but what’s going to happen? Are we all in danger?”

“I hope not. But just in case I’ll plead with Eddie to get an extra body guard to watch our house.”

“That’s so scary Robbie; Simone will be devastated. What will they do with you?”

“Well, they can’t call the cops, because they’re all guilty of various crimes, like knocking people off and such, so I don’t know yet; they’re tryin to figure it out, but they’re not too pleased I can tell you that.”

“I’m sure of that, my poor Robbie. Do they have their own legal system?”

“Don’t know, never been in trouble before, and I’m innocent, I swear.”

“I believe you Robbie, honest I do, it’s just that my head is spinning right now. Will you lose your job?’

“They may put me on probation for a time, but I might still get some pay, don’t know. It depends on the big guys and what they say, you know.”

“What am I going to tell Simone when she gets home from school?”

“Just tell her I’m still meeting with the bosses and I’ll be home a little late okay?”

“Okay Robbie, I’m really scared to death, so don’t forget to call when you know something.”

 

I hang up the phone and run to the kitchen to get some red wine, to soothe my mind. I am stunned and shaky and need to sort this out. All I can think of is Donny getting kicked off because he crossed one of the bosses; is that how they punish people who wrong them?

I know they pay off the cops like crazy so the cops turn a cheek. They usually stay out of each other’s way. Did Robbie steal money from the company? He is always worried about loans and such. No, he wouldn’t do anything like that; or would he? My Robbie, the sweetest husband and father in the world? I drink some more wine and try to believe that Robbie is completely innocent. I will honor Robbie’s words to me and say nothing to Simone.

 

“Hi, I’m home!”

“Oh, hi sweetheart, how was your day at school?”

“Fine, how come you’re drinking wine in the afternoon mom?”

Oh, I just feel like it; I’ve done this before. Did you have any tests today?”

“No, just lectures all day, pretty boring I must say. What’s for dinner tonight?”

“Actually, I forgot to take something from the freezer.”

“You never do that mom, what going on? Are you drunk?”

“No sweetheart, just busy trying to find a job.”

“Any luck?”

“Two possibilities. One at a women’s shoe store, the other at a jewelry store.”

“When will you know? Dad is already nervous about money.”

“I know Simone, but we’ll all be okay. By the way dad called and said he’d be late in these meetings and not to wait for him to eat dinner.”

“Is he okay?” Cause those rotten guys were awful to him this morning.”

“Yes dear, he’s okay; he called twice and he seems pretty confident that the bosses won’t be rough with him. How about since it’s just you and me, we order a pizza and pick it up.”

“Sounds good to me mom. You still have a weird worried look on your face. Hope everything is cool.”

“What kind of pizza would you like Simone? I’ll call in for pick up.”

“Since I know you’re nervous and jerky, you pick the pizza okay?”

“Okay, how about a large with olives, peppers, sausage and extra cheese?”

“Wonderful mom, great choice. I’ll keep you company on the ride.”

 

So, I call for the pizza and it’s about twenty minutes til it’s ready. There is a rather long silence between us. Then:

“Maybe if we get a large one, we can save some for dad. How late did you say he would be home?”

“He didn’t really say, but I’m guessing maybe nine or ten.”

“Mom, what’s the worst thing they can do to dad?”

“I don’t even want to think like that Simone. It’s so worrisome.”

“Would they kill him?”

“I don’t think so, but they could make life hard for him.”

“Like what mom?”

“Where’s my wine? Oh, there it is right in front of my nose. I think I’ll have another glass. I’ll guzzle because we have to leave soon.”                                                     

 

We pick up the piping hot pizza and drive home. No word from Robbie yet. I feel sick to my stomach and I only nibble at the pizza, while Simone is starving and dives right in.

After eating we watch some TV, then she excuses herself to do homework. I’m still drinking my red wine and feeling a bit tipsy. By ten o’clock, still no word from Robbie, and there’s no one to call; wait, maybe Eddie knows. I try to call, but no answer. I pace the floor and light up a cigarette, which I almost never do. I go upstairs to find Simone and she is fast asleep, light on, book in hand. I quietly take the book and turn out the light.

 

Now I’m alone in my dreadful thoughts. It’s midnight and Robbie is still not home, and no phone call. I don’t even know where they took him. I wait up until 2:00AM, decide to take a sleeping pill, hoping that Robbie will be by my side when I wake up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

© 2021 Betty Hermelee


Author's Note

Betty Hermelee
Each chapter can be read independently, but best as to refer back to other chapters
Artist: Betty Hermelee

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Featured Review

I don't like Robbies chances of getting back home unscathed, or worse, owing them for something that will always be owed, no matter what he gets dragged into.
I guess that's how they do what they do, find innocent guys, lay the blame and drag them into their world with few options for escape....They can be quite unscrupulous these damn gangsters, so I hear 😊
Certainly captured my imagination with the main protagonists, Robbie, wife, daughter and opening it up to all of their perspectives. All innocent, yet dragged into a drama not of their making
Loking forward to the next instalment and for some reason, craving a roast chicken and peppers pizza 😉


Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

Hi Lorry, thanks for your in-depth review and glad you liked it! Fondly,Betty



Reviews

I love getting to the point with books when I look forward to reading them. I read this chapter, excited, then reread it again and now I can't wait to read more. You grip us with the plot, the characters, and the dialogue. I've seen it in the comments, and I agree, this story really pulls you in, and by the time a chapter is done, you get that sort of surreal feeling of stepping out of a theater after a good movie. (Did I really read that? It's SO good, I'm gonna read more!) I'm so intrigued by where the plot is gonna go and the next installments. There was a sort of loneliness and anxiety in this chapter, you can really feel the tension bubbling. Cannot wait to read more!

Posted 3 Years Ago


Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

Thanks my loyal friend, so glad you're enjoying it... so appreciated....I read chapter 1 of your sto.. read more
It's good that you use a lot of dialogue to tell the story, which engages the reader better than just telling them everything. If Robbie comes back, he'd best start associating with better people. Hopefully, sunrise will find him still in good shape.


Posted 3 Years Ago


Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

Thank you for your loyalty dear Samuel; the best is yet to come! Beat always, Betty
Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

PS a reading your story this weekend!
Okay, what's happened to Robbie. No point killing him, the loan won't get paid back, so he has to get used in some plot or another.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

Thanks for reading, you'll see!!!
This is a story which really keeps the interest. We see the action from the viewpoint of Sylvia, the wife. We can feel her anxiety mount after her phone conversation with Robbie. Despite the daughter's presence, she feels all alone and uncertain as to what to do. Her spouse is in the hands of extremely rough actors. The suspense builds nicely, and at chapter's end we are really eager to know what happens. In paragraph 6, though, who is Donny?

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

Thanks for a great review John... Donny was the son who got killed by the mob!
In the paragraph beginning: "I hang up the phone and run to the kitchen to get some red wine, to soothe my mind." -- it looks like you might've used "Donny" when you meant "Robbie" . . .

The first 2 paragraphs are made up of ALL very short sentences & it feels like you need to vary this by using some longer, complex sentence structure.

I do not like your dialogue in this chapter -- it feels like you have characters say stuff that people do not normally say & it comes across as mindless over-blathering. You clarify points for the reader, rather than producing authentic dialogue. You need to separate what you want a character to say & what you want the reader to know (should be a dialogue tag, not part of the dialogue itself). Examples . . .

"“Sounds good to me mom. You still have a weird worried look on your face. Hope everything is cool.” -- I would put it like this: "Sounds good to me, mom," Simone says, noticing the strained look on her mom's face. "Hope everything is cool."

"“Since I know you’re nervous and jerky, you pick the pizza okay?” -- I would put it like this: Hoping to calm her mom down, Simone sees the menu jitter in her mom's trembling hands, "You pick out the pizza, okay?"

“Where’s my wine? Oh, there it is right in front of my nose. I think I’ll have another glass. I’ll guzzle because we have to leave soon." -- I would put it like this: "Where's my wine?" Simone picks up the wine glass from right in front of her mom's nose and hands it to her, "ooops! oh yeah! I think I'll have another glass." I guzzle it, headed for the door, then slam the wine glass on the foyer table.

Your writing is clear & compelling as always & your storyline is interesting, but this is not your best writing . . . sorta lackluster, too much telling instead of showing, and then your blathering characters which state the obvious over & over. Sorry not to be more enthusiastic (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 3 Years Ago


Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

Hi Marge, I’ve edited Chapter 6 to include more personal, less repetitive stuff, though I must say.. read more
barleygirl

3 Years Ago

If you have something to share, please feel free to send it in a private msg. I will always make tim.. read more
Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

okay will do!!
I don't like Robbies chances of getting back home unscathed, or worse, owing them for something that will always be owed, no matter what he gets dragged into.
I guess that's how they do what they do, find innocent guys, lay the blame and drag them into their world with few options for escape....They can be quite unscrupulous these damn gangsters, so I hear 😊
Certainly captured my imagination with the main protagonists, Robbie, wife, daughter and opening it up to all of their perspectives. All innocent, yet dragged into a drama not of their making
Loking forward to the next instalment and for some reason, craving a roast chicken and peppers pizza 😉


Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Betty Hermelee

3 Years Ago

Hi Lorry, thanks for your in-depth review and glad you liked it! Fondly,Betty

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Added on December 14, 2020
Last Updated on January 5, 2021

Author

Betty Hermelee
Betty Hermelee

Black Mountain, NC



About
My love of poetry results from my love of art. As a painter I am able to express myself on a canvas. As a poet my words come from my heart, my moods, sometimes sad, mostly upbeat. I like to use vivid .. more..

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