WHAT WILL THEN FOLLOW?

Before came anger's leave, just yesterday
Before its presence in me was no longer truth,
Many a time did alter, the night to day
Many a time did alter, the cold to warmth,
And it did not leave with hands mild and empty,
But forever was it gone with a piece of me.

Then following it’s leave, just yesterday,
Despair did knock my door today,
And not fume, not fire, nor a restless mouth;
Whose tone awakes the unpleasant me,
Did it at all possess, such mien, such theory;
But calm it was, in its presence all.
Calm it remained, as from dawn the night did fall,
And in not rush, but calmly it had me view my all;
For a kind it was, of wily words which settle quick:
It is not fire, but fire to me seems meek,
For I, not even on flames lavish wipe,
Ever as today felt a burn so deep.

So of its leave, I twist and turn in the currents of wonder,
Of not how and when all shall sustain,
But to what other piece of me I am to also bid fare well,
I dismay what void I shall with remain.

And what will on tomorrow follow its leave
To knock my door for a part to seize?
Then just what other piece, will it also take of me?
Deep, deeper and deep I think and see
Not a void too small, too big but an empty me.

Author's Note

This poetry is a reflection of a certain difficult time in my life, where my world didn’t but seemed to be turning upside down. A time of which was changing me to someone I did not like. So being in contradiction to that of my new self, I tried to fathom when and how this change came about. And this poetry is an attempt of trying to “poetically interpret” my realizations.

Reviews

[Maria Ni Mhurchu]

The feelings of anger, despair and emptiness are very strongly felt throughout your poem Betty. And the fear of what tomorrow brings is key to the poem....is that right? Seems like you've had a rough time of it but that you came through it. The fire symbolises that, I think.

[Betty]

Maria thank you so much for having read my work and reviewing it... And yes you have a clear understanding of the poem. It was inspired from the many struggles i was going through in life and just the kind of mentality i was leading up to.

[Maria Ni Mhurchu]

I hope the struggles have past.

[Betty]

Yes it did Maria. Thank you :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

there is a reckoning in this, a coming to terms...trying to understand and accept...reminds me of langston hughes' poem "Cross"

letting go of the anger, the angst, negative demeanor, and yet like his poem, at the end of this one, so many questions? of what will become of me?

nicely done..

i first line did you mean "anger's leave"?
that line tripped me up a bit in the reading...but as usual most of this just rolls off the tongue when reading aloud.

[Betty]

Jacob, thank you so much for the kind review, your words mean the world to me. And yes i meant "anger's leave" a definite punctuation error, thank for the look out :))