Belief vs Reality

I believed love was a beautiful fantasy,

Realized it’s just give and take policy

I believed trust was utterly precious,

Realized it could be truly dangerous

I believed Hard-work pays off well,

Realized without luck it hardly sells

I believed innocent faces were cute,

Realized it’d be a smart Satan’s plot

I believed happiness was achieved by things,

Realized it has to be found from within

I believed mistakes were truly dangerous,

Realized there are no better tutors than those

I believed the greatest asset to be the wealth,

Realized even bigger liability could be the health

I believed everything that glittered was gold,

Realized how easily I could be fooled!

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Devanshu Rajput]

"I believed love was a beautiful fantasy, Realized it’s just give and take policy"

This opening couplet was a beautiful one. It gives us an insight of your futher poem.

"I believed trust was utterly precious,Realized it could be truly dangerous"

This couplet really portrays the truth. But, in case a person has trusted a wrong person.

"I believed Hard-work pays off well, Realized without luck it hardly sells"

True, if there is no luck, then all our efforts are in futile. Bravo!

"I believed innocent faces were cute, Realized it'd be a smart Satan’s plot"

A somewhat similar to second couplet. But, this time regarding the shrouded imposters, who in order to deceive, veil their physiognomy.

"I believed happiness was achieved by things, Realized it has to be found from within"

From this couplet, I find the absence of your fashion of rhyme, that you had employed so far. So, this couplet somewhat breaks the fluidity. Immaterial of that, it also is good. Indeed! If a person, is not happy from inside, then no other caprices or luxuries of world can make him glee.

"I believed mistakes were truly dangerous, Realized there are no better tutors than those"

As, the adage goes," Mistakes, mean you are trying". You have written the ultimate reality of life.

"I believed the greatest asset to be the wealth, Realized even bigger liability could be the health"

As, " Health is wealth", what can be achieved in the absence of health?

At last, a grand concluding couplet:-

"I believed everything that glittered was gold, Realized how easily I could be fooled!"

"Al that glitters is not gold". We should not be mesmerised by only the tip of the iceberg, but we should also get to the bottom of anything.

A very philosophical, write I might say. Collection of 8 couplets, a wonderful job, Deepika.

Devanshu

[Deepika]

Thank you so much Devanshu for your beautiful insight! :)) I'm grateful to you for this elaborate and cognitive review. Not sure if I myself could have justified my work this well. This means a lot :)

[wordman]

a beautiful write,this is why you must have total honesty and trust

[makoy]

Wow. This is a powerful insight. Your entire poem shapes really well and the vision is just astounding. Keep writing!

[Deepika]

Thanks for stopping by and for your encouraging words :)

[Harpreet kaur bajwara]

i have no words. it is fantastic

[Deepika]

Thank you Harpreet for dropping by :)

[Harpreet kaur bajwara]

your welcome g

[W R Stowe]

Not necessarily fooled but perhaps misguided I wrote one titled "Man in the Mirror" check it out this was a nice rendition of how we view ourselves within fantasy nice work

[Deepika]

Will check that out! Thanks stowe :)

[W R Stowe]

your welcome

[Jeyanthi]

Very nice and motivating, Deepika. :)

[Deepika]

Thank you much Jeyanthi :)

[Calliope]

"I believed hard work pays off well/ Realized without luck it hardly sells." Sadly true, as is all the subject matter you've featured in this poem. Great work overall!

[Deepika]

Thank you dear friend for your kind review :)

[Ana B.]

Beautiful lesson of life. Very well written!

[Deepika]

Thank you Ana :))

[FNG]

This piece is truth in its simplest form. You have pulled back the curtain on issues that people struggle with everyday and some fight to ignore. Keep writing like this, because people need to hear.

[Deepika]

Thanks dear friend :)) Sure will do :)

[Emily]

Love this one!
One of my favorites from you!
Keep it up!

[Deepika]

Thanks a lot Emily :) Glad you liked it very much :)