The Nightmare Rose

There are two versions of this poem. This one is the first version. It was my favorite until I lost it and then it reappeared magically. ^-^

 

 This rose is unlike any other rose.

It is the darkest black you can imagine.

It is so rare that if you find one

you are already dead inside.

This rose is a perplexual nightmare.

This rose....the nightmare rose.

It is a masterpiece by Darkness itself.

You're probably wondering why

your body doesn't respond to you.

You tell it to run as far as it can,

but it is futile in the end.

So many dark thoughts running

running through your head.

Your mind aches from the temptations

and the dark desires of your heart.

The rose feasts on these desires

and you are helpless to stop it.

Your body feels so heavy and

your heart even more so.

You stagger and stumble.

You cry for the nightmare to end.

The Nightmare Rose laughs at your misery

and absorbs your new taste of agony and despair.

You plea to the rose even more now,

but it still laughs and becomes one with you.

It's deep hatred and lustful desires haunt you.

You try to run away and find your savior.

You realize you are on your own.

All I can say is cross your fingers

and hope for the best.

Author's Note

ignore grammar problems, but tell me if I mispelled anything. My computer is not letting me check my spelling. >.<' My computer really doesn't like me.

Reviews

[Burr the Story Sorceres..]

This is a truely amazing piece of art. You show the other side of the coin. The rose is normally a sign of beauty and love, but here you show the hatred and lust of a rose.
Your flow is beautiful, your imagary is wonderful, and the feel of the poem is fantastic.
I really love this poem. You get five gold stars for this one.
^_^

[Blade & Blood (The ..]

Okay, this is just plain amazing. Since I'm a sucker for roses (red/black/white especially lol!) I just had to check this out, and I'm very impressed with what I've read.

Heh, giving a rose a sadistic personality?--a personality that very much matches my own? Genius! I actually feel like a I have a connection to this poem. ;) The cliffhanger is phenomenal... it's got some dark humor in it. lol So obviously, you've got some excellent detail in here.

Excellent job!

Ironically Yours, Blade and Blood

[The Mad Prophet]

*Looks in his closet, finds a bouquet of Nightmare Rose's* I knew I had a few of these. Accept I am the Darkness, I have already went through hell, so now these are just decoration. The flowers made me stronger, and my mind so ever wiser to the world and it harsh ways. I sleep with a few under my pillows hoping for an actually nightmare, or a dream because I want out of this reality, but my curse is that I am not allowed to remember my dreams. Which then affects this reallity. I have no more dreams, and my only passions left is cooking, and writing. These did affect my chance to ever find love, but I won't dwell on that.

Very good poem, I can relate easily. Love the metaphore, thought I would play with it too :)

[Jessica{is inspired by ..]

There were a few mistakes spelling wise:
"You're probaly wondering why" ---probably
"and absorbs your new taste of agony and depair."---despair

That was all I saw in that area. You might actually want to take a look at punctuation. Things like commas would really help the reader know what the flow is supposed to be.

I like the idea behind this poem. By the time you find this "Nightmare Rose" you are already dead inside. It gives a feeling of hopelessness.

Overall, nicely done.

Jess