Spiralling

Spiralling

A Poem by Bella-Marie
"

How I feel

"

Like a death trap

Colours

Hues

Bright

Bold

Cold

Dim

Dull

 

Breaths forced out

Dying

Trying

gasping

trying

Trying

 

Clearest light

Freshness

I can feel

Peace

Thankfulness

 

 

The torture is over....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For now..........

© 2009 Bella-Marie


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Reviews

the first stanza is cool but the secind is like you ran out of idea's on what to right.
Keep trying thoug

Posted 14 Years Ago


I didn't like in the second stanza how you repeated trying. Were there other words you could have used instead? Like maybe one of them could have been crying or something. I don't know, but I DID like the first stanza, and that at the end you put "for now." Very well done.

Posted 14 Years Ago


cool.
do u die?
hehe

Posted 14 Years Ago



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106 Views
3 Reviews
Rating
Added on December 12, 2009
Last Updated on December 23, 2009

Author

Bella-Marie
Bella-Marie

Hamilton, Waikato, New Zealand



About
See that picture? Yeah, the profile picture of me. Yeah, yeah, that one! Well, that's my cat, I know! She's so cute, eh! I love my cat, she's the bomb. No, you're cat can't me as good as mine... maybe.. more..

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