Pulling myself together

“There’s nothing I can’t handle!”
I’ve told myself this many times. There have been times I have felt like my entire world crumbled in a matter of days.
On one occasion, I discovered my live-in boyfriend had cheated, got rejected from nursing school, and was faced with eviction with nowhere to go, all within 48 hours. Did I mention this was around the anniversary of my dads death?
Another time, within the course of a week of relocating to a city (on my own), I wrecked my car, had my phone stolen, and discovered the man I was in love with and had planned to move to Europe for was secretly married.
During these times, when my circumstances seem impossibly overwhelming, I have repeated that small mantra to myself over and over until I start to believe it.
Why is it, then, that I have allowed myself to have such a hopeless attitude about my current circumstances. Have I lost that spark of eternal optimism I have worked on cultivating for years now? Perhaps. Or perhaps I have allowed myself to succumb to my overwhelming anxiety and it has started to rule me. It is possible that my confidence and security has been worn down and chipped away over the course of the last six months. To what do I attribute this?
Moving to a new city, working insane hours every week, being isolated on the west coast without familiar friends or family, undergoing emotional tidalwaves at the hands of Narcissistic men, gaining that 15 pounds that destroyed my body image, and the stress of urgent life decisions that must be decided such as housing, nursing school, and relationships.
Sometimes it feels like I’m living small crisis to small crisis, panic attack to panic attack, relationship ultimatum to relationship ultimatum, without any emotional or situational stability.
Is this my anxiety; making every small obstacle into a fear-ridden emergency? Does the lack of actual security in my life turn difficult but relatively simple setbacks into a massive catastrophe?
I believe so.
Time to pull myself together. There’s nothing I can’t handle.