craziness

I keep holding on
to the only thread of life
as the faint ghosts flow
come and go out of sight
so I wonder
 have I lost my mind?


the world changed color
now it's all in grey
is this reality true?
is it only in my brain?
I keep wondering
 have I gone insane?


Regret knocks my thoughts door
rushes in, conquers me all
takes from my flesh the soul
leaves me with a rotten core.


an advice to you that read
keep holding on to your dreams
never let them from your heart flee
remember, it's you that makes them real!


we're all a little crazy inside
search thoroughly, I know you'll find
a small hidden part that is blind
hold on to it, cherish it with pride.

Author's Note

hehe don't know where that came from :P

Reviews

[DrD]

Message poetry is always interesting and is seductive in its appeal. You message comes across clearly and with force. I am a little doubtful of the structure of the stanzas 6-6-4-4-4 and don't know why but I'm sure you do. In all, I found it to be an enjoyable read.

[Salar Majak]

thanks , and i am not sure about theses XD

[Annabelle Lee]

its good.

[Salar Majak]

thanks

[Wolfwind]

I really liked this piece. The flow and rhyme in it made it read very smooth and it's overall character spoke to me of how when we are surrounded by turmoil and things that spoil our dreams and even our realities, it's very important we cage a part of our inner spark away, deep inside us. That way when at last the world allows us to be free or to walk again along peaceful green grass, we can open the doors to that reserved piece of ourselves and not be oppressed by all the negativity of the past. At least that's what I saw in it. =)

Wonderful Ink!
Aaron

[Salar Majak]

thank you alot for this peice you respond to mine, your words were a pleasure to read, thanks alot

[Wolfwind]

You're welcome! =)

[rnuff]

This is a wonderful emotional write, like the rhyme scheme and flow.
Nicely written

[Salar Majak]

thanks alot :)

[Jordan's Back]

This is a Damn Good Write. a Story of my life in sumary to be honest. Excellent job!

[Salar Majak]

hehe thanks alot,gladyou like it

[quinfinn]

if you let your dreams go you will lose all sanity....it is a coping mechanism. this is a superb write, i feel a little "maintenance" would make it damn near perfect. oh, and....i love it!

[Salar Majak]

thanks!!!

[Siren]

I like it. lots of good advice here. (:

[Salar Majak]

thanks!

[Sid]

Sweet write, this really got me thinking and you are right I will hold onto my dreams because they have the power to define us. We definitely have that craziness inside of us and I think as writers it's that craziness that brings out write like this. This is a very well worded poem and I like it a lot. That last part "a small hidden part that is blind" does it mean the part that is unaffected by the turmoil and stays true throughout without prejudice? Well that's my interpretation...anyways this is a great write, well done!

[Salar Majak]

i love your interpretation XDthanks alot!

[Sid]

Anytime :)

[Richard Man]

Nice ideas here. Even the most stable and sane of us have a little bit of craziness locked up inside.
I really liked the verse starting " Regret knock my thoughts door...."
Strange and interesting structures of your phrases... rather like the way Yoda speaks.
1st verse: perhaps it would be better to use "float" and not "flow". As a suggestion try " In and out of sight."
The last verse.... cherish the part that is blind.... because it can't see the ghosts and thus stops the regrets?

[Salar Majak]

yup, you are right about the last part, thanks for the suggestions i'll work on them , thanks for the read :)

[Ayvid N]

No Aurora! I will not let my dreams go and let the crazy world be gone!
Well written! Thanks for sharing it.

[Salar Majak]

hehe thanks for reading