Lower Than Low

I'm on a new level.

Lower than low.

I'm sinking into misery.

Deeper and deeper.

I don't want to be saved.

I want to feel the Earth's core

Beneath my finger tips.

Six feet under,

Down, down, down.

Just bury me deeper than a body is allowed to go.

I feel terrible,

Like I'm at blame.

For all that has happened.

For all the misery I allow to control me.

I am no longer me.

Depression has taken over.

And I'm starting to no longer care.

You say you love me,

Forever and always.

I guess I'm too much to handle,

For everyone ends up saying the same...

"I'm sorry, I don't feel the same anymore."

Maybe that's part of life,

Pain, falling in love, falling out of love.

But to me, that's all it ever will be.

For, I've fallen out of love with myself.

I can't love me for who I am,

When I can't tell you what I stand for,

What I keep fighting for,

Or who I am in the first place.

Forgive my mistakes,

But how many mistakes can I make,

Before it's no longer forgivable?

I can't tell you how much I wish

I could change everything.

Go back in time,

To save myself, to save those who matter the most.

But I can't.

What's done is done.

You made your choice,

And I'm trying to make mine.

How you can just give up so easily,

It fazes me.

So bury me deeper than the human body is allowed to go.

Six feet below?

No, give me more.

I'm on a new level.

Lower than the dirt that shaped our world.

Let me touch the Earth's core.

Let me burn, and burn, and burn.

Until I'm no more.