Mirrored Reactions

Taken from many conversations I have had with my boyfriend. It was written in the form of a conversation to add to the effect. The parts that are bold and Italic are supposed to be him.

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes.  ~Sally Field
~*~*~

Anguished disgust
It’s written on my face
Double chins
I can never erase
Pinch the skin
My thighs look like ham
My hair is ridiculous
So much for glam
~*~
Imperfections make you, you
Love who you are
They way others see you
When you look in the mirror
Be like me
Lie to yourself
It will make it easier
You’ll see
~*~
Easy to say
Look at you
Your body is perfect
Your skin the perfect hue
Hair golden
Tanned to the core
Quit playing innocent
You know what I mean
~*~
Your going crazy
You need to eat
Your starvation lust is killing me
What does it matter
What those girls said
You are beautiful
Even when you first get out of bed
Don’t get yourself down
You’ll see soon enough
Please consider
Giving it up
~*~
Black is the new pink
Makes me thinner
Even if it’s a scheme
I want to be something
More in my life
I want to see beauty
Be divine
Uniqueness is an option
But where will that road lead
Stick to what we know
Make me skinny
~*~
If only you knew
Your running out of time
Your beautiful
The only one who doesn’t see
Give up this game
Your killing me
Giving into your lust
No food to eat
Stop critiquing
You are beautiful to me.

Author's Note

I never liked what i saw when I looked in the mirror and I still don't, I am constantly putting myself down, The tiniest flaw will send me out of control. A lot of people have told me that I lie when I say that I have problems with loving myself or Being okay with my weight. But they are wrong, I know what it is like to go days without eating for fear of becoming fat. And I know what it is like to try to hide who you are with makeup and false smiles.
I have learned to love myself, not completely but with help it is a work in progress.