Barren Wasteland

I want to be remembered as the girl who always smiled the one who could brighten up your day, even if she couldn't brighten her own.
~*~*~

Crying is weakness
I will not let it show
Masking my pain
Letting the hurt flow
Hiding under the covers
My only safety is night
When morning comes
I will be alright

Hidden away
I will not let it show
You hurt me once
Now is your chance to gloat
I fight back the tears
Razor in hand
Fighting to survive
My barren wasteland

Mimicking my past
Promised you would repeat
How does it feel
You took all of me
Giving up on lessons
I was hoping to send
Where do I stand
Now it has to end

Horrible impressions
My skin begins to bare
River of crimson
Won’t save me from here
Bottle it up
Let it hide
Here it will come out
In the stillness of night

I loved you more
Than my body could bare
I held you close
I tried to be there
I wanted nothing more
Than to be there with you
But will nothing stop this pain
You made to be true.

Crying is weakness
I will not let it show
Masking my pain
Letting the hurt flow
Hiding under the covers
My only safety is night
When morning comes
I will be alright

Author's Note

People are always telling me to smile, like smiling is going to just take away all the hurt and pain. Well I've tried that I've tried hiding my sorrows and covering the sadness in smiles and what I've learned is that when it hurts this much inside your heart always has a way of showing it no matter how many masks you wear.

Reviews

[joshua deathdealer]

Awesome write!! favorited

[Revolutionary]

Smiling will make them notice less.They want you to smile to make them feel better.I read this poem with an open mind.I love the way it creates an uncomfortable scene of hiding under the blankets holding back tears.
I like to cry .It is a healthy release of toxins.I watch movies that make me cry when I feel emotionaly toxic.A real full on from the throat cry your eyes out can clear your head and put everything in prespective.

[RedInk524]

True. No matter how many masks are made, they all get old and worn and none of them are perfect. People say to smile like the problem is on the outside and can easily be fixed, but what most people dont realize is that the problems are on the inside and just leak out. And whats worse is that fixing those inner issues are much more difficult than most would think.

[Helpless]

awesome write

[Kat]

this is true and i can relate to it
my friend once told me "My pain never shows out on my face" and i took her arm and uncovered it and i said "you're right instead it shows up on your arm"

[CharlesMonroe]

I want to be remembered as the girl who always smiled the one who could brighten up your day, even if she couldn't brighten her own.
i wanna be remembered this way to. I love this Ali...it describes exactlly how I feel...this is amazing..

[Tasha]

Crying is weakness
I will not let it show
Masking my pain
Letting the hurt flow
Hiding under the covers
My only safety is night
When morning comes
I will be alright

This was soo amazing, you did a really good job.!

[Spiral Panda]

I love that quote in your author note. I've used it before. Doubles the stand out nature of your poem words.

[☯]

An amazingly portrayed poem. I also like the little note, where you talked about smiling through hurt. I always tell myself to do this so I don't being the others around me down, so I don't worry them with my own burdens. I can see why you wrote this, and it's so emotional, but also very forgiving. Another amazing write :)