Frozen

 

 

 

 

 

Darkness on my shoulders

Starting to feel the frost

Never looking back

When all the hope was lost

 

I remember the days

When I didn't feel so cold

Making me feel so alive

Memories now lost and old

 

The whispers and the silence

Are like deafening screams

I should have learned my lessons then

Love is never what it seems

 

Frozen tears

My fate has been chosen

Missing you here

With my heart so frozen

The sun glitters upon the snow

As I'm waiting for something new

Hopelessly in love

I'm still missing you

Tempatures are dropping

As the snow starts to fall

So cold, my heart is frozen

Awaiting frozen tears to thaw

Reviews

[Y.F.]

I'm so glad you've suggested I'll read it (a few days ago, in a review) - this is really fantastic.
The imagery on this one is so unique, and the final two lines sums the poem up so neatly.
"So cold, my heart is frozen
Awaiting frozen tears to thaw"
A broken heart is a pain you can't escape, and so far no one have invented a full proof cure.
So sad, so true, so great.

[Bhavya Kaushik]

This is exactly what I wanted to read in my contest "Frozen tears" and thanks a lot for submitting this one...

It's really an awesome write and I literally sensed and felt the immortal pain in each and every word, every line of the piece.

"Frozen tears
My fate has been chosen
Missing you here
With my heart so frozen"--I specially loved these lines a lot and It's exactly what I'm feeling and that's the reason for which I could relate myself too much with this piece.

Definitely an awesome write :)

[Franchesca N.]

Wow. I like the way you wrote your poem.
You have a nice style. :) Can you please review my poems once I posted them? I need to improve my techniques. -_-"

[Vatsayayana]

Simply stunning!
I can feel the bitter wind of ice and snow.
The imagery is that of a frozen expanse of tundra. Endless with the falling snow.
This is beautiful, truly beautiful.
You capture the emotion of a broken heart, frozen to the core.
Brava!

[mattavelli]

This is beautiful.
I really like the flow of the last section.
Have fun. :)

[Jenny Davis]

Like the other reviewer, I too, felt the cold seep in my bones while reading this...this is a very good piece :)

[Tania Leigh]

"The whispers and the silence
Are like deafening screams
I should have learned my lessons then
Love is never what it seems"

Beautifully written....great imagery, as I can "feel" the cold