LAST MILE

Was it just the wind blowing upon my skin
That sent a shiver making me draw within
Or was it the memories I could not defend
The faces and places I should have befriend

The winding path I dared to trod through life
Took its toll slicing my soul with a rusty knife
I paid the pound of flesh from my corrupt soul
Praying time not temptation would fill the hole

But I now walk the last mile of God's great gift
Balanced between heaven and hell's fiery rift
Slow going the uphill climb for judgments decree
To shed my skin, my sins and again be truly free
                            Bear

Author's Note

I leave most punctuation to the reader that they can read the poem in their own meter, mood and motility. I thank you for taking the time to read my work.

Reviews

[ReedWrite]

Wow, Bear.
I love this. Where do I begin. I hear so much passion and pain weaving through these words. An agonized soul...seeking redemption...freedom...release. I loved the lines: The winding path I dared to trod through life/Took its toll slicing my soul with a rusty knife
Great line...slicing my soul with a rusty knife...you can almost feel that pain. I also loved the lines: But I now walk the last mile of God's great gift/Balanced between heaven and hell's fiery rift
I feel that every day...balanced between heaven and hell. I think we all feel that angst. Loved this poem. Loved the flow, the rhythm, the voice. Nicely done.

[Bear]

Thank you for the incredible review, when I wrote this I wasn't sure anyone not at least a sexagenarian would catch the nuances without experiencing it but everyone seems to get it. I shall gladly return the read and review favor.

[Mary Helda]

This poems just screams redemption and freedom to me, I read through ot twice and then went ahead to look at my life and realized their are certain things that I need to forgive myself for, pain that I have to let go. Thank you for giving me that

[Bear]

Wow! There is no higher praise a writer can get than to hear their work has inspired reflection on a reader's own life. I thank you for such a great review :~)

[1VJ]

A philosophic treasure, love the rusty knife second stanza.

[Bear]

Thank you for the kind words, I almost added a line explaining how it was the tears of my life that had rusted the knife but realized I would need to add another line to list the reasons for many of the tears. That would take even more lines and before I knew it I would have an epic poem and I am not a fan of long epic poems :~)

[Rebecca Garber]

The first stanza had me think. I thought of me standing in the middle of no where. I all of a sudden got goose bumps, Having the wind blowing around me. Then i picture myself with thoughts going through my head. The are really not that beautiful of memories. The torture the pain, that I have endured. So I could picture myself questioning if it was the wind or the memories. Then when it says the faces and places i should have befriend, made me think of the things that i should not have been with. the people that I should not have be friends with would have stopped the pain. Yet the people i could have been with to help me through the pain. The winding path i dared to trod through life, made me think i were i was to were i am and to were i want to be. It took its toll slicing my soul with a rusty knife, reminded me of the pain that i have went through, the emotional and the physical. I paid the pound of flesh from my corrupt soul, made me think of the sins that i need to pay for. but the time i spend praying asking for forgiveness i have ask for the help. But i now walk the last mile of god's great gift made me think that i have been given a path to follow i need to follow it and not give up. I can succeed in this thing called life. I understand the thought of being between the lord and the devil. up until the very last moment of when and were I should be free.

You have a very amazing voice. Your readers are able to connect with your writing very well. i want to say that you are a great writer. Don't stop writing you can do it. You are amazing.

[Bear]

I thank you for your kind review and from your words it as if you walked around in my head taking note of every thought and memory at play in the creation of this poem. I compliment you on your perceptions and powers of understanding, I also want to welcome you to the poetry101. I shall gladly return the read and review favor soon :~)

[Bala Gorthi]

This is my first reading of your work. I am glad I read this one. From journey to inner journey and this drawing within is something very essential to the soul.
Talking of the last mile of God's great gift with a wish for being a true free soul at the end of the journey is something that caught me up. Life should be just a pure celebration once the purity of soul is understood as everything gets shred in the process.
I loved the way this write is written. Your writing itself is celebrating the life.
Thank you for writing this amazing piece. Keep writing.

[Bear]

Thank you for such a great review, I shall gladly return the read and review favor soon :~)

[ManasaC]

Freedom is what we all crave for. Being trapped in is suffocating. The way you build the poem is brilliant. I loved it!!!

[Bear]

Thank you, I am glad you enjoyed it :~)

[Abhilash Hegde]

It has philosophy written all over it and definitely conforms to my taste :)
Seems to me like a - walk into the sunset, a write in retrospection ?
It was nice reading, Bear. You always have a way with words. Thanks!

[Bear]

Thank you, it is good to know that some of the philosophy class I took years ago is still in my head lol.

[Daisy]

This is indeed incredible! I should have known how amazing a writer you are.
"I paid the pound of flesh from my corrupt soul
Praying time not temptation would fill the hole"

Remarkable description of how time heals the woes of the soul. Smooth and thoughtful maneuvering of words. Privileged to have read this beautiful piece of work. Well Done :)

[Bear]

Praise like that will go straight to my head and it is big enough already, to much talk like that and I will have to hire someone to walk beside me and help hold my oversized he up. Thank you, you are to kind :~)

[Daisy]

HA HA ! You deserve it :)

[brian]

Wow. This is beautiful. This is intensely spiritual, and penetrates the heart of why we're here. I loved and really enjoyed reading this. It truly connected with me. With your poem, I picture you are eaither close to death here in this life--contemplating whether you will end up in Heaven or Hell--or that you have already passed into Heaven, and are now looking back on your life. Either way, your poetry and rhyme-schemes put it all into perspective and make us realize--either way--we are going to either one or the other! Great job.

[Bear]

Thank you for the great review. I am nearing the end of my life but the truth is I was playing around with rhyme lines and connected these twelve from the fifty to sixty lines I had written. That was a game my Aunt would play with me when she started teaching me to write some fifty years ago. Your analysis is very intuitive maybe you are a poet whisperer :~)