Dec 1

I know how it feels to question yourself. To wonder if you are good enough or not.

To have someone say they believe in you is great. Sometimes it's the difference between pushing harder or hanging on a little longer. Yet, too many people say it without actually standing by it. I had an old boss tell me she believed in me. I didn't believe her. I felt she was trying to use it for an ulterior motive. Get me to do a job that no one else wanted to do.
I also don't think people realize how significant it is to say to someone in general. It's something you have to stand by and have to continuously show.

I have no ulterior motives. I don't want you to think that I'm saying this only to leave not long after. Which is why I never left. I can't imagine ditching you. I knew that it would reinforce what you already thought. I didn't want to. I'm too busy getting lost in the moment talking to you. Which I can't help but think of and picture the future as well. 5, 10, 15+ years. All the things we can create, evolve and accomplish. Just you and me. Changing the world as a whole. Even if it means making it a little bit brighter or colorful in our wake. The two of us together can do anything. We cant do things alone. I want, no, I need you by my side. I would feel far more confident and at ease with you at it. You actually tend to convince me to believe in you more with each passing day.

The way I see it:
Your pain is my pain.
Your happiness is a main component to your success.
Your success? That's something everyone will benefit from. Far and wide.
I just wish I can see the glow in your eyes. I know that it's there. 🙂

Have I believed in people before? Absolutely. I still do with them. Hasn't changed.
You? There's moments in our lives that someone comes into it and we just know. We know they're different from everyone else. Something special. We know that they are meant for big and can do remarkable things.

To have you excited and passionate about the same things feels right. It's hard to be so passionate about something, try and tell someone. Only for them to not get or see it.

This is why I told you that I'm going all in with you. Pushing to find out what excites you. That way I extract the best out of you.

Like, I feel you trust me but there's still some uncertainty there. I know it's hard for you to completely trust someone still. I get it. The thought of me acting has I'm sure crossed your mind. Truth be told, I'm trying to find ways to reassure that I'm not and 100% serious with everything I say. If there wasn't an ocean between us, I would walk to see you to prove it if I had to. May have to go through a few pairs of shoes (haha) but I would have left yesterday.

I understand that you are afraid of showing your weakness. Giulia, darling, it's ok. This is why I wear my heart on my sleeve with you. You can hurt me at any time. Yet, I trust that you won't. Hopefully you feel at some point you can take a chance and do the same with me. I don't want you to feel like you have to pretend to be something in order to fool people to feel safe either. If I could, I would send you one of my shirts or sweaters to wear as much as you want. While I cannot be with you currently, to feel like I am holding you and keeping you warm. See you wear it would be kinda cute. Hehe

As a child being fascinated with Dino's, I had wondered what it was like to be an archeologist. In the dirt, rock, mud etc trying to uncover these hidden treasures. It like that with people. You have to get down and get dirty. Slowly move away pieces of the earth in order to uncover the whole skeleton. Or in the case, the whole person.

I see it as while doing that, I stumbled upon something more. Something more precious. A hidden gem. One that needed to be first brushed off. Had some shine to it. After some careful cleaning, it's really beginning to shine. The brightest of sparkle that can catch anyone's eyes. Lighting up any room.
The rarest of beauty in a world thats dark, cruel and unforgiving.

Many like to invest in stocks. I like to invest in people. To build and evolve them. Time is limited. Can't buy it and can't get it back. My belief and investment in you? Everyone will win.