Feeling it

It happened one night.

When I saw you   I knew

 

You had that look  The look that said yes

 

We had only been friends  This now changed

 

My mouth went dry   Your heart pounded

 

You smiled so sweet   My eyes so bright

 

I walked to you   You stood your space

 

You appeared unsure   My breathing was not

 

I sized you up   The momentum moved us

 

You stood in your area   The game was on

 

I touched your face   You didn't flinch

 

You looked up   I could hear your heart

 

You smiled sweetly   I kissed your lips

 

We knew

Reviews

[Lorelei1969]

I love the way love is portrayed in this poem; the differences in the reactions, the knowing, the start to finish. When you know, you know and I honestly believe in most situations we know! I was able to envision the looks, the expressions, the gestures. Even writing this review I can picture each face. Well done!

[Ballpark Frank]

Oh my! Thank you! It was completely fiction but it flowed somehow. I appreciate you reading this. Very kind.

[ETERNITY]

Yes, it is a beautiful love story told in condensed form. The comments usually help me to write a review. I've experienced love unrequited and it hurts until it's justified. Thanks for sharing this "fiction".

[Elena Damjanovic]

Ooh I felt this on a deep level. This made me feel like I was in that place again, I love it. ❤️

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you Elena. That's a wonderful comment and review.

[Fran Marie]

Sounds like the connection
was made ..well penned
and nicely expressed poem
well conveyed

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you Fran. I appreciate that.

[Temperance]

Lovely poem and the title fits it perfectly! Sometimes, someone's eyes can say it all. It is so great when the feeling is mutual. Nicely done! Temp

[Ballpark Frank]

I am thrilled you liked it! Thank you so much. 💓

[Temperance]

You are welcome!

[Kelly Scheppers]

The heart wants what it wants, and we are mere chess pieces in its play. Good to meet you, Frankie!

[Ballpark Frank]

You have wonderful way with words. I agree too!

[Jenni Bailey]

So suspenseful in how how it's written! Good job!

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you! You are kind. Thanks for reading.

[Jenni Bailey]

You're welcome!

[Robert Haigh]

When it happens it happens. If one feels that way but the other doesn't, it can ruin a friendship. But if you feel sure it's for both of you, then why not? Like Lisa, I found the font a little distracting, but I could read it, so no great problem. The poem itself is fine. I enjoyed the read.

[Ballpark Frank]

Is it the font color, or the font itself? I could change it easily.

[Robert Haigh]

I think it's the font itself. Although it is in bold type it looks slightly blurry to my eyes.

[Ballpark Frank]

Any better?

[Robert Haigh]

I find this easier to read, personally. I wear spectacles and I think that makes a difference in that bright, heavy text can sometimes look slightly blurred. This font is nice and clear.

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you so much for your feedback.

[Lisasview]

Since i never heard back from you regarding my honest review I can only assume that I offended you... Which of course was not my intention...
If so I am sorry.
Lisa, now in Spain

[Ballpark Frank]

I apologize. I am not offended. I'm curious though, Is the font distracting or the color of the print?

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
Sorry for such a long delay in responding to you.
Just now saw that you responded to me... but I never got it...so weird... I should have received a message....Anyway, no the color is not distracting...
I just felt that you could have used a different font and perhaps made it a bit larger. I felt there was too much separation between your lines and that because you used no punctuation I also felt that although I liked the poem...using punctuation would have made your words more powerful.
Please let me know your thoughts,
Lisa, now in Spain

[Dilan Gray]

The images and feelings are so strong. Your writing is amazing.

[Ballpark Frank]

thank you! you are too kind.

[Dilan Gray]

You're so welcome, I really enjoyed reading it.

[Ballpark Frank]

I know that this encouragment from you is helping me to want to continue writing.
sometimes hurtful or thoughtless comments can make some want to quit. So thank you!!

[Dilan Gray]

I understand completely and you're welcome! I hope you continue writing because I want to keep reading.

[Aura]

The uncertainty between two friends, a friendship growing into something more, blossoming into a new relationship. You capture that intital awkwardness between two people, who have feelings for each other but who are unsure how to show it to the other person. In the end, they knew it was going to happen, the chemistry is there. Beautifully written!

[Ballpark Frank]

You.nailed it. That's what I wanted to show. Thanks!!

[Aura]

My pleasure!

[Lisasview]

Although, I liked your words and definitely relate, I found it rather difficult to read because of the font you used and also because there is no punctuation...
I hope I have not offended you, and if so I am sorry...that is not my intention...
I just want to be 100% honest when leaving a review...especially if I really like the poem..
I feel this is important..
Just saying "Oh I love it" or " What a great poem" is not always good..
Lisa, now in Spain