Burning soul

Can tears put off the fire burning in the soul..?

In the mirror I see
the guilt on my face
The flames of neglect scorches my eyes
And the heat of my burns
conflagrates states of conflictions
Inflicting afflictions
I am consumed by the fire of my promises,my vows
wretched in my lucid insanity

Smoldering aspects of my mortality
Clutches onto my lonely heart
Only sinks me further
into the labyrinth of uncertainty
I have been searching the shore of certainty
in this drowning world
Only to Spark inner confusions & incinerating accord
Precisely savage memories
bring me to down to ashes
and my dead and dry dreams
so much ignitable.

Through clouds of vexation
my eyes cannot see far
Veiled by the darkened fumes of disharmony
Visibly, I see myself dying
But I am lying to the universe
While behind smokescreens of “well-being” I hide..

Deep into my retinas
somewhere in my vision
the flame in my eyes could be seen
coming from my burning soul
something that tears can put off...?

Author's Note

When your soul burns...you're on fire at the metaphysical level...it's like being consumed by desire, only instead of desire, it could be the intense heat of guilt or some loss...or......

Reviews

[Divya Punjabi]

Beautifully written. Loved it :)

[Praveeta]

Excellent write. Thanks for sharing.

[Prritiy]

Deep into my retinas
somewhere in my vision
the flame in my eyes could be seen
coming from my burning soul
something that tears can put off...?

wow! written very nice.

yes at times guilt, or loss too burns our soul deeply.

[Tate Morgan]

Well let us hope it is a loss you do not feel any responsibility for yourself.Nothing hurts more than that

[Leslie Philibert]

another example of fine writing from India...and I like cricket too !

[Robert James Parfett]

I liked the way you compared feeling guilt to being swallowed up by fire. You could certainly feel the heat!

[Cole Hayley]

great work my friend

[David Scott]

I could feel the "burning" here. I think this is the true nature of the fires of Hell... guilt.
Two considerations from my mind that would improve the read. I did not like using "certainty" after "uncertainty"... Be more creative with your word choice here. I think you will like it better if you try.
Also, the last stanza, "Deep into my retinas", could be more powerful if you personified this thought. An example would be, "Deep into the retina of my guilt" etc... This is not a literal flame, but the burning is just as real.
Overall, I think you did a very good job with this write. I got the point for sure!

[Balkaran Sidhu]

Thank you so much..I will try making those changes someday

[Muse]

You are gooood!

conflagrates states of conflictions
Inflicting afflictions

loved those two lines, damning and said with conviction.

[Irfan Bashir Shah]

Your feelings reflect in your poem and that's what makes it stand out... Your use of vocabulary is not exaggerated..... You have kept it simple and conveyed your message...
You end it beautifully too!
Thanks for sharing...