Confusion

Confusion

A Poem by Ralphy
"

Edited by Annalisa....eye surgery

"

 

Confusion
 
The morning of the day,
I await for something to cuddle me.
As I lay motionless in the solitude of my own room
I could not help feeling so alone.
Screaming and ringing sounded in the distance
Amplifying as my door opened
 
A milky cloud distorts my views
As they asked me the questions
--Of a personal nature
I felt the sledging,
pulverize my mind
choking my words in my throat
while trying aimlessly to utter a whisper
 
As the cool vital waters drip
Through the branches that finger my existence
My heart calmed to a gentle beat.
 
As the thoughts that once raced
Along the tracks of that vast highway
Broke the boundary and escaped
 
 
So many people around me
The confusion grappled my reality
As I ponder misery
What did I do wrong?
 
Can a single blade of grass
Conceal the lawn
Without the soil to affix its roots
 
Can a drop of pure water
Bathe an ocean and turn it blue
Without the aid of a twinkle in the sky
 
Can a single grain of sand
Fill a beach so that others
Can bask in the fruits of comfort
 
Can a single ray of sun light
Warm your soul
Without the radiance of something to hold
  
The answer is no
But without them
There is no tomorrow.
Suddenly, I can see
Perfectly clear

© 2008 Ralphy


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now thats one grand metaphorically enhanced work of heart to ponder, excellent choice of wording
ralphy, the analogies are written to height and draw the reader to dwell in the context, many favorite lines that express an over all timeless wisdom, like
"Can a single grain of sand
Fill a beach so that others
Can bask in the fruits of comfort"
such sentiments take hold of one's thoughts, to search for answers, and yet one seems to answer them all,
and that being found in the last stanza, its touching in the way the expression shows the reader new
perspectives, leaves a feeling of an added sense of knowledge, the meaning, what brings clarity into light,
as in self awareness, descriptively enhanced, an excellent read to edify the soul and mind.

Posted 16 Years Ago


5 of 5 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Good form, good choice of words, the poem flows well, and has a wonderful closing.

The whole imagery was well painted.

With regards to the message...

It was great.


I liked how you were able to draw enlightenment in the process of the poem, from the blurry vision in the start, to a crystal clear sight after. The process was seen in the middle.

This is a wonderful piece.

PS. I will be in China from tomorrow until 1st of May, you will not be getting a message until after.


Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

What a great poem, so full of metaphors great job!

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

An astounding write, and as Michael said, the metaphors are lovely.

As the cool vital waters drip
Through the branches that finger my existence

As the thoughts that once raced
Along the tracks of that vast highway
Broke the boundary and escaped

I love all of the questions at the end. It reminds me of the book of Job in the Bible when God was questioning Job so eloquently.

Beautiful-Beautiful-Beautiful!!!

2nd line....is cuddled to be cuddle? That was the ONLY thing that threw me off in this pristine piece of excellence! Very nicely done, Ralph!



Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

There are so many messages that I have seen in this beautiful piece of work. To mention them all, would be picking at the very depths of my soul and my mind. I was in the hospital not to long ago, so in a subtle way, some things were extremly familiar. I recognized them right off of the bat. Others, well, I don't even have to think about them as I read them because they make perfect sense. But they give me something to ponder even after I am done with it and far away in my own world. Your words linger in my head like a song on repeat. This one is amazing.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

now thats one grand metaphorically enhanced work of heart to ponder, excellent choice of wording
ralphy, the analogies are written to height and draw the reader to dwell in the context, many favorite lines that express an over all timeless wisdom, like
"Can a single grain of sand
Fill a beach so that others
Can bask in the fruits of comfort"
such sentiments take hold of one's thoughts, to search for answers, and yet one seems to answer them all,
and that being found in the last stanza, its touching in the way the expression shows the reader new
perspectives, leaves a feeling of an added sense of knowledge, the meaning, what brings clarity into light,
as in self awareness, descriptively enhanced, an excellent read to edify the soul and mind.

Posted 16 Years Ago


5 of 5 people found this review constructive.

I like this! How ou say lines like this....
"Can a single ray of sun light
Warm your soul
Without the radiance of something to hold"

And the last stanza eally brings the poem to a great finish manking people think. You brought good imagery in the poem.
This was a really great read-just like all of you other work.

Thanks fo sending it to me

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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46 Reviews
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Shelved in 8 Libraries
Added on April 23, 2008
Last Updated on July 30, 2008

Author

Ralphy
Ralphy

Belleville, MI



About
No matter how dark life is, or how clouded, there is always a lighter side to itone that fills you heart with love and your soul with joy Im a complex person of multiracial background, about 5.. more..

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