Pechschwarz

Pechschwarz

Part 1

Many a year ago a death of a mother broke a little girl’s heart into pieces. Giselle left solely in the care of her poor widowed father. Years pass and yet the burden of the woman’s death doesn’t cease. Giselle accedes a marriage for her father but he never accepts. She sees that he needs a woman’s love, but Mr. Klein refuses to partake. As Giselle’s sixteenth birthday nears Mr. Klein becomes more and more amatory with his newly blossomed daughter. Of course she refuses him, knowing what her morals are.

Days pass with silence. As Giselle bathes her drunken father enters the badezimmer with ardor.

 

“My, My Giselle, you are really starting to become like your mother, so beautiful.” he inches towards her starting to undress. He drops his bottle of Jagermeister and it flows down to the bathtub where Giselle sits, stunned. 

 

“Vater, why do you say this to me? I am your daughter… not your playmate.” she rises from the tub, dries off and puts on her nightdress. She makes up for her fathers inappropriate words because of the drink. “I am going to rest, I shall speak with you in the morning.”

 

“I may do whatever I please, I am your father, and its time you obey me!” he rushes to Giselle and throws her to the ground. He finishes undressing and rips Giselle’s gown off her and rams himself into her. Blood drips downward onto the floor, for which he slaps her. She screams and screams till her voice is gone, but nevertheless she never stops. He grips her wrists and pins them to the ground, he continues moving in her and slowly thrusts harder and harder. She screams again because the pain is too much, the pain of her first time, and the pain of her father forcing him in her. He grabs her throat in the hope of her silence, and succeeds; she soon becomes asphytic and loses consciousness. She awakens hours later to her father’s stare.

“If you so much as to tell anyone as to what I’ve done, you’ll reap the consequences.”

“Yes father”

 

Part 11

For several nights Giselle spends her time in her chamber crying and praying for her mother’s guidance. She writes in her journal that the next morning she wants to sneak into town and tell the police chief what her father has done to her, but is scared father will know.

That night she dreams of her mother and she cries, cries for her death which came too soon, and for the wrong reasons, and cries for her daughter who fears she will die in the same manner. Suddenly she awakens to crisp air rushing in on her. The room is pitch black, damp, and smells of burnt meat. She tries to stand up but notices she is chained to the floor. She cries for help but no one can hear her, there are no windows and no door. She wonders how she got in and why.

What feels like days pass when she sees a small door on the ceiling open. A small beam of light finally shows her surroundings, a small dungeon with mold and rats moving every which way to search for some kind of food. They move towards Giselle and eat the dress she is wearing until they are full. A slice of bread is thrown to her and is told, “ this is all you shall get…Enjoy!” when the door slams shut.

Weeks pass before the door opens again. The rats have had enough of the dress and move to Giselle’s exposed skin, in which she can’t defend. A multitude of twigs and leaves are thrown into the dungeon.

“What is the meaning of this? Why have you imprisoned me here?” she yells

“You were just like your mother, and I knew you had to be contained. You would’ve gone off with my secret, and I would’ve had to do what I did to your mother. She knew too much of what I’ve done, for this isn’t my first encounter in this dungeon. I think its time you know your place…with your mother” A lit match is thrown at the pile of twigs which quickly burn and produce great flames. Giselle unable to move must lie while she is burned alive. Soon she dies and is no longer in pain.

 

Part 111

            Weeks later Police find Giselle’s body. She is unrecognizable; therefore she is buried without a name. The Chief of Police comes to realize that the body found was a woman, and that she was carrying a child.

            Giselle’s father disappeared and was never found… and Giselle’s death was never avenged. 

Author's Note

Please tell me what you think, I think this is one of my favorites i've written, but i'd love feedback!

Reviews

[Wolfwind]

Technically I found only one place that could use a comma... Other than that... it was grammarically very nicely woven.

Overall, I think it's a riviting tale, very Poeish, but that I'm not surprised having read through your older works. I found this piece to be vivid in it's painting of imagery and well timed in plot flow. It's a wonderfully constucted work of ink. For that alone... Two Thumbs Up.

Personally, I was left feeling at the end like this should have been the open scene to a movie or a series where the daughter comes back as some technologically advanced Angel of retribution and hunts down the father. =) That's just what my own imagination conjured up while I read.

Great Ink! Thanks for sharing your craft! Keep up the good work.
Aaron - Wolfwind