Chaos

Spoken word poem... something old but still my favorite of my rhymes.

She's falling, ends up crawling, wallowing in self-pity.

She cries because of her lies that ties her to her demise,

Her hands tremble like the skeleton they resemble.

Her sorrow binds, wrapping around her like vines, she whimpers and whines,

The unearthly rasp of her voice makes her gasp but there's nothing to grasp

As the ground falls away, there's nothign she can say, death has its way.

She is silenced in her last stance of defiance, no more reliance

On the ones who put her here, no longer filled with fear

Of what she doesn't know, doesn't have to put on a show

For what she doesn't believe in, all that wordly sin.

With the forces of light, the power unearthly, unbound take flight.

The chaos within that rages, fluctuating in stages of crimes

Of superstition she has supposedly commited against her religion.

She pines for a night, quiet, dead and without sight

Where she can pray for a day without pain and sorrow for the coming of the morrow.

Reviews

[jen -- JG]

This is a great piece of work. I really like it.

This is something that CAN NOT be read fast - it does not have a regular meter so important in most rhyming poetry but then THIS is not a regular poem.

This is a spoken word poem - where a story is told by the reader, with all the pauses and theatrical movement required - a type of monologue if you will.

It is a far cry from just reading a normal poem. When read using the punctuation as a proper guide, the feel of the story comes across better - it simply can not be rushed through.

I can see the stage where this should be read. A poets' reading den... the room filled with soft voices and the ching of coffe cups on saucers, then a spotlight sears the stage and illuminates a figue standing still.. The room falls silent and a voice begins to speak... to tell the story. Her voice is gentle, then raises in speed, volume and intensity as the story unfolds- falling to a gentle sound ... almost like a prayer as the final words are spoken. The room errupts with the sound of clicking fingers ... a reading poet's greatest award.

A lot of Shakespear's work could be read this way as he also used internal line rhyming.

This is a good theatrical monologue a spoken word poem that tells a good story.

VERY WELL DONE

jen-JG

[Krishna]

These truly are insightful, I feel again the heroic female role in this one, definately feminine and yet like a mythological character that is made stronger by the challenge. Do you think all our writing is so god-damm autobiographical in truth? I often wonder at this, the insights gain into the person from the poem? You know?

Few women could write like this, these long lines of twists and turns (more common among masculine word-play). It has a lyrical quality too, I like the fact that its a mouthful that pretty much depicts why chaos would be chasing...

[V. K. Harris]

This is breathless, I love the style, very well written Brette. :)

[Poeticpiers]

Clever use of internal rhymes to illustrate your theme. But not too easy to read aloud because it lacks meter.