Translation of the WritersCafe Bio

A mockery of growing trends I've begun to notice...

XXx Hate Me Even Though I love you like Edward Likes Bella Sparkle etc. xXX 's  WritersCafe Bio

                                      (or I 'm obviously 14 and have no creative ability )

 

SOOOOO...about me:

Well I pretty much freakn' *love/obess over* Twilight!!!11!!!!1!

   (I can't type but that's fine because I freakn love twilight)

Edward is mine! Bella will die. *whahaha*

    (self explanitory)

Ummm I like to write, and people say I'm pretty good. 

   (no one says I'm good but I think so)

Most of it's really dark though so just be warned...

  (when I say "dark" I mean emo and by "emo" I mean really lame)

My friends are friggin -SWEEEEEET-! And I don't mean in the sugar way. :) :) :) :) :)

Yeah. We b*****s. So don't mess with us. Grrr. Lolzzzzzzzzzzz

  (I'm tough and so are my friends so fear me and my bad a*s attitude)

My bestie bestie friend is Lu ( aka Suga Maple Teddy Bear on here) and I love her like a possum face! Lol! :)

Read her stuff! Or else. LOL! JK JK. X)

 (No jk. I will hunt you down and hurt those you love)

I like this boy  and I'm pretty sure he likes me but things are complicated. I wrote a few poems about it all so you'll probably want to go check that out.

 (I think I love him, but I really just want a boyfriend and he's available)

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Poems about us.

"Love", "Lost", "Alone", "Hurt", "Why", "Bleed" and "Why can't we just be together and love like the movies".

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 (I picked those titles because every good poem is named one of those titles)

Uh Paramore speaks to me. I don't know just every song just perfectly matches with my life.

  (...at least until the next band comes along...)

The Jon-A*S Brothers suck and are gay. Whitch is fine if teir gay. Because people are messed up when they say gay people can't get married and have kids. B******s. Besides I'm Bi so yeah. Bite me. (EDWARD!)

   (I'm just bi because it's cool to be bi now and I really do like the jonas brothers but still really can't type and more Edward stuff)

I get depressed alot so be nice when you read my stuff because It comes from the heart and not from an ecsiclapideia and just don't judge anyone because that's wrong and that makes you just a biggot.

(I can't handle criticism and anything less than "it's amazing" will force me to jump off a bridge and yes, you'll be to blame)

I can't spell super well and stuff so just get over it.

 (I don't care that I'm illiterate)

I eat nerds for breakfest.

(I dislike literate people because they are literate)

 

^-^ OK, ok stuff I like <3:

(or whatevers popular now)

Twilight!!!1!11!!!!! <3<3<3<3

Paramore, Linkin Park, Fly Leaf, Demon Hunter, other stuff...

French fries, Sunsets, Fred  videos, THe Office, LOLcats, MTV, Chance Crawford, Angie Jolie!, koala's, peanut butter, being random with Lu-Lu and our insdie jokes ( DON"T YOU KNOW THE KIMCHEE DANCE NOLAN? LOLLOLOL), Fire, 80's stuff, writing poems and myspacing. Twilight. Edward. Me. Love. Questions?

 

Stuff that sucks:

(or things I don't understand)

Life, Drama, F-n school, Jerks, snobby plastics, unoriginal robots, school, Old people (LMFAO), my family, life, having your heart broken, news, twitter, bloggers, posers etc.

So ya add me and read my stuff and ask me about anything you want to know.

(be my friend so I can be loved)

I love reading stuff so send me yours even though I probably won't get back to you in like a year because I'm crazy and busy this semester and such. Hahahha!

(You are not worth my time or effort)

So ya catch ya later suckas! XOXOXO

(I hate that I want you to like me so much)

 

 

"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them. " walt disney

 (Something I read off a flair once)

 

( various myspace graphics featuring cute sayings, emo porn, swearing, twilight stuff, butterflies, sparkly flowers and scantily clad faeries that all somehow explain to you who I really am)

Author's Note

To no one in particular...

Reviews

[Marie Anzalone]

You get about 30 seconds to get my attention... that's it. This kept me riveted. Your commentary was dead-on, and deadpan hilarious. Are they teaching this crap in schools? I don't know about you, but I am THRILLED when someone with talent, who has something to say, takes the time to read my work, and comment on it! Wow! Why? Because I know that my little scribblings have actually been worth the time of someone who knows a thing or two about grammar, setup, plot, character, intricacy, etc. If they're reading my work... I can't be as bad as I pretend to be. The rest... well... this is why God made us all with a sense of humor, I suppose. You can laugh or cry. Sometimes, I even do both. This... made me laugh out loud. Thanks fro saying what many of us are thinking...

[Closedown]

I laughed so much!
"I eat nerds for breakfest." Can we nerds get directions to breakfest? Seems like a pretty cool festival. I hope you know that the average person can only consume seven pounds of awesome before going into a hyperawesimic coma. Just warning you, we nerds are made of pure awesome.

[Short.Nerd]

This was hilarous! Wonderful job on it. (:

[Norma M Sutton]

ROFL OK now I feel positively ANCIENT! lol I can't even remember much about being 14 . . . my life revolved around my horse back then lol.

[Taylor H.]

THis was hilarious. Loved it! I didnt know it was a spoof at first and I was like...wow...this person is retarded lol. Great job with this haha

[Invisible Ink]

Really funny and what a cool idea... I like it!
(dang, i think she will probably get first place in this contest, but it is pretty dam funny... wish i thought of this... hey, this would be a good contest to create)

[Crazy Cat Man]

awesome i love it :D

[R. L. Aversa]

This is hilarious, and competely accurate of so many of the bios you see all over the internet on various networking sites.

But you forgot the Zodiac graphic andthe little ticker with the ladybug or the frog letting everyone know how many days until their next birthday.

:)

[Unwelcomeguest]

lol, omg this is liek so total awsome. Peeps lk this should be shot ROFL!!!!!!!!
¬¬
Im so glad I dn't know any. Lol.

Thankyou for your contribution. I look forward to any more commentary you have on the stupidity/obsessions/downright creepiness of others.

[Coyote Poetry]

A excellent bio. I understand. Never enough time in a day. Have fun and be safe.
Coyote

[Georgia Gypsy]

OMG!! I was friend req by this person yesterday!!!(no joke)....denied them too!.

Marie sent me this, and I have to say I laughed all the way through!!

Great JOB!!